Soccer Page 372 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Copa Del Rey Trophy Ended Up Lodged Under A Bus Bumper Last Night
As we alluded to earlier, Real Madrid's Sergio Ramos dropped the team's fresh Copa del Rey trophy off the top of a promenading bus in Madrid last night. Just hours after the team earned the title for the first time in 18 years (thanks to Cristiano Ronaldo's header against Barcelona), Ramos let go....

Here's Video Of The Cristiano Ronaldo Goal That Beat Barcelona Today
Real Madrid won the Copa del Rey over blood rival Barcelona 1-0 on an extra-time goal by pretty boy Cristiano Ronaldo. Great, chippy game settled on a header in the 103rd minute. As it stands, Real now leads the four-pronged El Clasico 1-0-1....

Your Barcelona-Real Madrid Segundo Clásico Open Thread
The Spanish Superbowl enters its second stage today in Valencia. This one is for the championship of the Copa del Rey. On Saturday, Real Madrid managed a shorthanded come-from-behind 1-1 draw in a league game. Over the next two weeks, the teams will play twice more to decide a Champions League semif...

British Soccer Announcer Makes Most British Goal Call Ever
Dejan Stankovic scored a beautiful goal for Inter Milan in their 1-0 win over Roma in the Coppa Italia semifinal yesterday, and the great Ray Hudson was there for Gol TV's call. Magisterial, indeed....

The Most Deliberate Own Goal You'll Ever See
A week old, but just making the rounds now. From England's fifth-tier Blue Square Premier, a striker is instructed to get back to help cover on defense. With a lob coming his way, reflexes take over, and rather than clear, he volleys it past his own keeper. Poor bastard....

Qatari Government Begins Arresting World Cup Reporters 11 Years Before World Cup In Qatar
These Qataris don't wait around. The World Cup is set to kick off in Arabia during the summer of 2022, when temperatures will exceed the boiling point of steel and most life forms will already be extinct. So why not start oppressing reporters now?...

Lionel Messi Smacks The Ball At Real Madrid Fans But Doesn’t Mean It. Honest.
Lionel Messi has always been seen as the exception to the rule that to be a proper good footballer you needed to be a bit of a 'orrible git. You needed to like head-butting people (Zidane), make well-late tackles (Scholes), be outrageously arrogant (CR7), shag prozzies (Wayne), or just do loads of...

Here's Video Of A Really Cool Goal From A Dutch Soccer Match Yesterday
In yesterday's Dutch league action, Roda was up 4-2 on VVV Venlo. That's when Pa Modou Kah, described as a Gambian/Norwegian defender, decided to go all "pretty scissor kick" to add a fifth goal to the tally....

The NBA And NHL Playoffs Are Fine And All, But The Rest Of The World Is Watching El Clasico Open Thread
Big game's about to start. (GolTV's pregame show starts at 3 p.m. eastern; game itself an hour later). FC Barcelona's beaten up enough on defense to give Real Madrid a legitimate shot at avenging their 5-0 throttling from earlier in the season....

Soccer Fans In Portland Behave Curiously Like Soccer Fans In Any City Outside The United States
Look at all these throaty buggers backing MLS's new team — the Portland Timbers. The Timbers made their home debut last night. Portland fans got to sing the national anthem. So what if the Star Spangled Banner is the only song most Americans have at least some handle on that's not Top 40 dreck? (P...

This Uruguayan Striker Sets The Standard For The 360 Spin-Move Goal
Last night in Bolivia, Blooming and the Destroyers played their annual friendly, the Copa Fundacion de Santa Cruz. Blooming won the match 2-1, and this beautiful self-assisted spin-move goal from Uruguayan Diego Martinones was the game-winner. He nearly one-upped the Swedish kid's back-flip penalt...

The Owl-Kicking Panamanian Soccer Player Has Acquired A Taste For Human Ribs
Remember when Luis Moreno of Deportivo Pereira kicked an opposing team's mascot — a living, breathing, hooting owl — to help save its wide-eyed soul in February, but it ended up dying of shock? Yeah, well, Moreno's back in the kicking-creatures business, and business is good....

Rio Ferdinand Is Cyberbullying Piers Morgan And His Moobs, For Some Reason
Cyberbullying is not funny. And it's certainly not funny when the former captain of England and the host of one of America's most influential talk shows [Deadspin editor's note: No.] start having a go at each other on Twitter....

Here's Your Champions League Open Thread
Two games on this afternoon: Shakhtar Donetsk takes on Barcelona at Donbass Arena, and Manchester United hosts Chelsea at Old Trafford Stadium. They both start at 2:45, and with Chelsea down a goal on aggregate, they must win to advance. But Wayne Rooney, threat to already-cursing children everywher...

Charlie Davies Attempts To Save His Failed Goal Celebration By Doing "The Bernie"
Since he returned to professional soccer in late March, Charlie Davies appears to be having a great time. The 24-year-old has scored four goals in three games for D.C. United, which has him on loan from the French club FC Sochaux; the latest tally was this late-game penalty kick against the Galaxy...

Brazilian Striker Neymar Does A Nice Bit Of Skill And Finishes With A Pass
Apart from the fact that The Spoiler has yet to spell his name correctly at the first time of asking (it's Neymar, not Naymer, you idiot), we're growing rather fond of the young Brazilian....

Wayne Rooney Curses And The World Heaves
Shrek got angry after scoring a hat trick against West Ham last Saturday and spat a few acrid words into the camera. Now Shrek will lose 250,000 squid and miss an FA Cup semifinal because some asinine arbiters of morality in sports have decided there's no cursing on the pitch....

This Swedish Kid Sets The Standard For The Back-Flip Penalty Kick
In a game between FC Baar and FC Sempach, two youth clubs in Sweden, Baar's Joonas Jokinen debuted the back-flip penalty kick. We're quite certain this has never been done in a game before. A few places have referred to this as a "somersault" kick; we'll give young Joonas the credit he deserves....

LeBron James Gets Stake In Liverpool, Joins Unofficial Club For The Filthy Rich
LeBron James is smiling because even after an embarrassing hour-long ESPN special this summer that maligned him to the majority of humans not residing in South Beach, and even after his hometown fans burned his Cleveland jerseys and turned his name into a curse word, and even after his new team face...

Watch Dejan Stankovic Air Out A Goal From Midfield
Inter Milan's Dejan Stankovic scored a goal just 20 seconds into a Champions League game against Schalke last night in Milan. More accurately, Stankovic fluidly picked the ball out of the air from midfield and sent it searing past Schalke goalkeeper Manuel Neuer with one touch. From fifty meters o...