1 Page 219 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here's Some Wholly Believable Donald Trump Jr. Gossip<em></em>
Earlier today, Miami-based DJ Scott Melker posted a story on Facebook from his time at the University of Pennsylvania—time that he shared with none other than First Son-hopeful Donald J. Trump Jr. And according to Melker, Don Jr. (and his father, for that matter) behaves pretty much exactly like you...
Liam McGeary Enjoys Violence
Thirty-four-year-old Liam McGeary is undefeated over the course of his MMA career. The lanky, British-born fighter won Bellator’s light-heavyweight championship in February of 2015, and went on to defend it that fall. But having nursed a nagging leg injury since 2014, McGeary stopped competing to fo...
The Cubs Were Built For That
When a championship is decided under circumstances as historic as those that saw the Chicago Cubs claim their first World Series title in 108 years, the impossible becomes overdetermined. The evaporation of a 3-1 series lead leaves behind chokers, miraculous individual feats, and moments of immense ...
I'm The Big Boy
In 2011, The Metropolitan Golf Writer’s Association awarded the Trump family the honor of Golf Family of the Year. Also in 2011, Donald J. Trump Jr. was a big, fancy booster chair boy....
Dying Is Easy, Making Famous Politicians Seem Funny Is Hard
Disclaimer: Any assumption that the political jokes contained in this article are funny will lead to disappointment....
Ted Cruz's Children Finally Happy In Public As Dad Hides Most Of Face<em></em><em></em><em></em>
“Two little girls... very excited to trick or treat with Mommy and Daddy.” Words that would be perfectly fine-ish under normal circumstances. Unfortunately, tonight, they come from this man:...
Report: Trump Dodged Paying Tens Of Millions In Taxes<em></em>
According to a report from the New York Times, Donald Trump avoided paying “tens of millions of dollars” in taxes after he failed to declare hundreds of millions of dollars in income, thus exploiting a IRS loophole so legally murky that his own advisers told him that the IRS would probably penalize ...
Trump Supporter Arrested For Vote Fraud Claims Polls Are Rigged
An Iowa woman arrested on charges she voted twice for Donald Trump attempted to explain her behavior by stating that “the polls are rigged,” according to Iowa Public Radio....
Anthony Weiner's Dong Tipped The FBI Off About New Clinton Emails
The FBI announced this morning that they plan to investigate a new batch of emails from Hillary Clinton, after finding them in “connection with an unrelated case.” That unrelated case? Disgraced horny former congressman Anthony Weiner sending dong shots to a 15-year-old....
Can You Spot The Tiffany Trump In These Photos?<em></em>
Earlier today, the Trump campaign published a press release with photos from Ivanka’s big day campaigning for her father in South Florida. But there’s allegedly another Trump daughter in there, too. Can you spot the Tiffany Trump?...
Senator Mark Kirk Mocks Tammy Duckworth's Mixed-Race Background During Debate
Rep. Tammy Duckworth is challenging Sen. Mark Kirk for his U.S. Senate seat in Illinois, and the incumbent unleashed an incredible comment about her mixed-race heritage during tonight’s debate in Springfield....
Trump "Speaks" Hindi In Surreal Attempt To Pander To Indian-Americans
Donald Trump mega-donor Shalabh Kumar has posted an ad in which the Trump himself speaks Hindi. In fact, the deflated egg sac emits just a few words before the video cuts ahead, suggesting that he couldn’t muster five words in a row, one of which was his own name. ...
Trump Supporter Wrong
A political reporter for a national news outlet has located a supporter of Donald Trump’s presidential campaign who is factually wrong....
Trump Ally Alex Jones: I'm Not Anti-Semitic, It's Just That The Jews Control Everything
You see, it’s not that Alex Jones—whom Donald Trump has previously called a “nice guy” with an “amazing” reputation—hates the Jews. It’s just that he knows how how devious and money-hungry they really are. And also that they control the Ubers....
Trump Eventually Remembers Daughter<em></em>
As Donald Trump took some time off from the campaign trail to unveil his brand new D.C. hotel, he took a moment to bring his much beloved children on stage at the inaugural press conference, so he could show them off to the world. Tiffany Trump was also in attendance. ...
Remember When Donald Trump Got Booed For Butchering "Take Me Out To The Ballgame”?<em></em>
The day: July 9, 2000. The place: Wrigley Field. A young, 54-year-old fake billionaire with wild aspirations had been practicing singing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” for two full weeks in preparation for his big debut. And as Donald Trump gleefully tore into the mic, an entire stadium began to boo....
Andrew Bogut Dunked On, This Time On Twitter <em></em>
Dallas Mavericks and former Golden State Warriors center Andrew Bogut’s political beliefs are exactly what you would expect them to be. He complains about the rappers, cars, and the bling bling in the NBA; goes on random right-wing podcasts; is anti-workers rights; and frequently tweets profoundly u...
Can Donald Trump Grow A Beard? An Investigation
Donald Trump’s sense of self-worth seems to be based entirely on his status as an alpha male. He’s obscenely competitive, feels entitled to women, and is apparently fixated on the size of his dick. One hyper-masculine symbol, however, appears to have eluded Trump his entire life, for Donald Trump ha...
Bobby Bowden Rambled For A Few Minutes At A Trump Rally Tonight
Legendary former FSU football coach Bobby Bowden spoke at a rally for Donald Trump this evening in Tampa. He mostly talked about the importance of having a strong military, and asked the crowd “Aren’t you getting tired of these other nations embarrassing us?”...
Let's Just Fix The Busted System Instead??
If your nation has a political system that is, by design, unfair for an enormous portion of your population, don’t bend yourself into pretzels trying to accommodate this bad system. Change the system, idiots! ...