a Page 7506 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Brett Favre Victimized By Improv Comedy Group
New York Giants lineman David Diehl makes his comedy club debut by mocking Brett Favre—and doing a pretty good job of it, actually. It was such a spot on impersonation that he even told his jokes to the wrong audience. Video below....

A Closer Look At Michael Strahan's <i>Brothers</i>
Any comedy show staring some who has played for the New York Giants in automatically funny, of course, but what exactly can you expect from Michael Strahan's new Fox sitcom? I've just seen the first trailer, so let's break it down, shall we?...

Cricket Player Sidelined Due To Violent Case Of The G-dubs
"The medical board has reported that Shoaib Akhtar was suffering from genital viral warts and the wound needs further care and treatment for another 10 days," the PCB said in a statement."[GuardianUK]...

Obama's Two Favorite Things Are The Steelers, Making Children Cry
A group of kindergarteners had their hearts broken yesterday when they showed up for a White House tour and were told they couldn't come in because staff had to prepare for the President's visit with the Pittsburgh Steelers. Also, because the tears of the innocent give Barack Obama sustenance....

Ryan Leaf Used To Be Carried In The Arms Of Cheerleaders, Redux
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Jake Peavy Says "Thanks But No Thanks" To White Sox
Jake Peavy loves batting so much that he can't bear to leave the National League, so he decided to reject the trade that would have sent him to the Chicago White Sox. Also, he knows how to read a box score. [MLB]...

Yuk It Up, Stoners. The Olympics Torch Looks Like A Doob.
At left is the official torch of the 2010 Vancouver Olympics, and, yes, I realize it looks like someone rolled up half of Humboldt County in the world's biggest Zig Zag....

Jeter On The Lam After Bank Robbery, Support Of PatriotsBlue Jays
Chad Floyd Jeter is wanted by police after allegedly robbing a bank in Alabama, while wearing a New England PatriotsBlue Jays cap misidentified by Alabama police as a Patriots hat. (Who did you think I was talking about?) He is considered armed and dangerously clutch. [Wicked Good Sports]...

And You Thought Winning The Spelling Bee Was A Longshot
"Over the years words like "Ilanders" (Islanders), "Leaes" (Leafs) and "Bqstqn" (Boston) have found their way onto the Stanley Cup, while more than a dozen players and coaches have had their names butchered." That's Sidney with an I, Louise St. Jacques! Someone with a silent S should know better. [W...

Royals Fans Turn Children's Playground Into Thunderdome
Two couples started an all-out brawl at a Kansas City Royals game on Sunday after a woman walked in front another woman as she was taking a picture, a breech of etiquette that clearly deserves a head stomping. If a few kids got hurt along the way, that's just business....

Why Do The White Sox Need Think They Need Pitching Help Anyway?
Poor Bartolo Colon. 8 runs (only one earned, though!) in two innings of work and then the world caved in. [Yahoo!]...

La La Vazquez Says Dallas Fans Have Racist Family Values
So the Dallas-Denver brouhaha is not going away. La La Vazquez is still talking about her long night in Big D, only the language is getting much more colorful. She says fans were throwing around words like "bastard" and "fuck" and that one that even I won't spell without asterisks....

Raiders Come To Terms With Fast, Toolsy Budget Airliner
The Raiders are teaming up with "low-budget, long-haul" Air Asia X and sticking their logo on the tailfin of an aircraft, now dubbed the "Commitment To Excellence" plane. A sad metaphor waiting to happen. [Examiner]...

For The Young Self-Starter Looking For A New Challenge This Summer
Apparently all 10 teams of the Lingerie Football League are now interviewing applicants for their internship program. Goldman Sachs now has competition. [NBC Los Angeles]...

Yankee Stadium Threatening To Get 100 Percent More Insufferable
Great news! The most obnoxiously self-indulgent team in college football wants to join forces with the most obnoxiously self-indulgent team in baseball. Yes, folks: Notre Dame wants to play football in shiny new Yankee Stadium....

Fake Ben Roethlisberger Has Internet Cancer
Terrible news, everybody. The cyber weirdo who is trolling the internet pretending to be Ben Roethlisberger has imaginary cancer. There's a PayPal link below where you can help send him an virtual bouquet of AOL sign-up CDs....

Beware The Flying Sausage Casings At Nat's Games
The Nationals are having a helluva year. Misspelled uniforms. Misspelled bats. They suck. Now sausage-shooting meltdowns: "They were very clearly exploding as they were shot out, and we could easily see the bun and foil that were laying on the warning track." [WaPo]...

Ricky Rubio Is Already Getting The Hang Of The American Game
The ping-pong balls have barely settled, and already Ricky Rubio, the mopheaded Spaniard who reminds everyone of Pistol Pete if Pistol Pete had discovered the defensive crouch, is strongarming teams in the NBA draft....

The NFL's Alarming DUI Problem
Interesting story by Yahoo's Josh Peter about the NFL's most under-reported problem: "At least 73 players on NFL rosters during the 2008 season have been arrested on charges of driving under the influence..."Yahoo!]...

At Least One Person Still Collects Football Cards
I was not aware that anyone still manufactured or collected football cards—I kind of chose not to be aware—but the market is apparently still strong enough that an on-duty police officer recently felt compelled to shoplift some from a general store....