a Page 7786 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

An Actual Umpire Bump
• If you're a manager, it's best if the ump doesn't bump you. [UmpBump] • Interviewing the national rock, paper, scissors champion. [Red Sox Monster] • Could the Twins contend in the second half? [Icy Hot Sensations] • What should Candace Parker's nickname be? [So-Cal Sports Hub] • Now here's a team...

The Western Michigan Whitecaps Will Restore Balance To The Universe
Welcome to Minor Enterprise. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy....

Media Approval Ratings: John Saunders
We learned last year that John Saunders had been shopping memoir about his rough-and-tumble life on the streets of Toronto. We wouldn't have guessed his life was that rough-and-tumble, but what do we know?...

A Love Letter To The Deadspinners
We say this in all seriousness, and mean it about as much as we could possibly mean anything: The main goal of this site was to give people something entertaining to distract themselves from their desk jobs. We feel like we somewhat succeeded in this role; it's terrifying to contemplate how many law...

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured it's message boards to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......

It's NBA Draft Night! Check Out The Suits!
The NFL Draft might be for the obsessives, but the NBA Draft is for fans who just want to watch a good show. We've mentioned this before, but we think the NBA Draft, with the recognizable names, outstanding outfit and vague sense of looming David Stern menace, is infinitely more entertaining than t...

Look At Those Crazy Rays, And The Dead Fish
• Battered Fish. A 10-run inning? Wha? The Battle of Florida is not going well for the Marlins, as Tampa Bay enjoyed a 10-run, 14-batter, 32-minute fifth inning on its way to a 15-3 win. Carl Crawford had two homers and five RBI. Believe it or not, it wasn't a franchise record for the Rays, who once...

Shawn Chacon's Guide To Punching Your Boss In The Face
You know what baseball needs more of? Physical fistfights between general managers and players. Imagine the fisticuffs that would ensue between Jon Daniels and Milton Bradley. Jim Bowden and Elijah Dukes. Heavens, Theo Epstein and David Ortiz. We might buy a pay-per-view of that....

The Post Is Certain To Experience Technical Difficulties
“It's like how much more black could this be? And the answer is none, none more black.” – Nigel Tufnel...

Your Morning Video Wake Up Call
Good morning, sunshines. Today's video recap features your College World Series, Mike and Mike throwing out first pitches, Tony Reali giggling and, yes, Erin Andrews. Enjoy....

About Last Night
What you missed while celebrating your city's choice as the Nation's Sweatiest City ... • NBA: Jermaine O’Neal to be sent from Pacers to Raptors for T.J. Ford, Rasho Nesterovic, 17th pick in the draft and a player to be named. But it's not official yet, so don't spread this around. [Yahoo Sports] • ...

Yes, No, Dude, Catfish
"Girls Gone Grabblin'" is a video featuring women of all types and ages, swimming around in dirty water trying to wrestle catfish (sorry, "grabble") out of their mud holes. The image on the front of the box is deceiving: the accompanying film footage and website do not feature buxom Southern gals in...

To Watch Tonight
Irony, thy name is Pittsburgh ... • Boxing: Lightweights, Julio Diaz vs. David Torres, in Beverly Hills, Calif. (11 p.m., ET). No better place for this than the mean streets of The BH. [ESPN2] • College World Series: Championship series, Game 3, Georgia vs. Fresno State, in Omaha (7 p.m., ET). There...

Jason Giambi Has Become A '70s Porn King
Jason Giambi has dyed his mustache. That made this happen. Heavens to Betsy....

2008 NBA Draft Rankings: 1-15
I'm not going to bother trying to figure out who's taking whom. I mean, it would be easy if teams used common sense and drafted based on need ... but who does that anymore? So instead, I'm going to rank the available players based solely on talent, potential, and whether the coin I'm flipping lands...

Wimbledon To Pigeons: Die, You Filthy, Winged Demons
Apparently, there are others besides Mike Tyson and homeless people who still think pigeons are animals worthy of protection. The organizers of Wimbledon are not in this group and have done everything besides hiring armed guards to keep pigeons from entering their precious, precious air space — unt...

SuperYid Youkilis Drubs The Hardly Punchless RedBirds
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's best baseball g...

Dee Mirich Says Goodbye To Our Editor In Her Own Special Way
She doesn't actually mention him by name, but we know that prolific Internet horse poet Dee Mirich has been touched in a profound way by Will's imminent departure. Just read between the lines of her latest poem and you'll find a stirring tribute to Will, Deadspin, and of course Grade II Peter Pan St...

Youth Golfers Get Blindsided By Boob-Infested Golf Outing
A golf team of pre-teen youngsters got a little more than they expected when they showed up for their junior club golf outing on Monday. Due to a scheduling "miscommunication" the lucky kids got to share the clubhouse with the annual Shotgun Willie's Charity Golf Tournament, an event sponsored by a ...

A Day Playing Catch With Charlie Brown
I've been a Peanuts fan pretty much my entire life, but it took the new Baseball as Allegory exhibit to finally drag my sorry butt out to the Charles M. Schulz Museum in Santa Rosa, Calif. I highly recommend the experience if you happen to be in the neighborhood, if for no other reason than to sit ...