aba Page 139 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Iroquois Nationals' Long Nightmare Is Almost Over
The fourth-seeded Iroquois Nationals were supposed to play host-country England today at the lacrosse world championships. Instead they're taking tourist photos in Times Square and loitering outside JFK. What went wrong for the guys whose ancestors invented our most cherished sport?...

Cavs Owner Channels Crazy Person: "Some People Think They Should Go To Heaven But NOT Have To Die To Get There"
Owner Dan Gilbert has written an open letter to Cavs fans in the sort of prose you normally find wrapped around a brick. Note the font: The guy makes Comic Sans seem sinister....

My Complicated Relationship With Alabama
I get a fair amount of hate mail. It comes with the territory and part of me enjoys actually reading and responding to it. But there isn't really hate mail quite like Alabama hate mail....

Yet Another Kid Caught Drinking Beer At A Baseball Game
Great. Our third boozing tyke this month was spotted at a Rays game next to (presumably) the best dad since those hockey dudes. Or maybe he's just enjoying some delicious Tropicana Apple Juice™! [MJ Morning Show]...

Bucs Coach On What Happens In Training Camp: "You Take Off Your Underwear"
Here's Tampa Bay coach Raheem Morris giving his thoughts on what happens at a NFL training camp: "You take off your underwear, you put on your big boy pads and you put your face on people." The Bucs were 3-13 last year....

Spirit Airlines Graduates From Hornball Puns About Oral Sex To Hornball Puns About Catastrophic Oil Spills
The crappy budget carrier, known for its studiedly edgy marketing tailored to the Cocks-hats-and-Rohypnol crowd, is now cracking wise about the BP oil spill: "Check Out The Oil On Our Beaches." Seriously? Who besides Joe Hazelwood is this supposed to appeal to? [Sparty & Friends]...

World Cup Open Thread: Greece-Nigeria
Does Greece have any of the magic left that took it to Victoryopolis in Euro 2004? Order the souvlaki and comment below....

World Cup Open Thread: South Africa-Uruguay
So, these two both played to draws in their respective first games. Uruguay shamed France, but "Bafana Bafana" is really fun to write, so let's root for them....

Your Culturally Insensitive World Cup Goal Roundup Of The Day (Video)
Two games today, two goals. Both of them in the first game. Bafana Bafana's Siphiwe Tshabalala knocked in a real beaut at the 55-minute mark, but Mexico's Rafael Marquez nailed the equalizer in the 79th. See, ties are fun....

How One Energy Company Will Prevent Catastrophic Oil Spills: Swivel-Chair Safety
What you are about to read sums up everything that's boneheaded about corporate America — and it all begins with a swivel chair. Read, weep, and learn....

Thurman Munson Was Lucky To Die Young, Says Writer
Okay, so maybe Munson's death in a 1979 plane was one of the more horrible tragedies in sports. But at least he never had to DH!...

Professional Sports Reaches Its Apogee: Drunken Little Person Berates Red Sox Fan
What's the only thing better than an intoxicated Rays fan — who happens to be a little person — threatening to fight a fat Red Sox fan? When somebody catches it on video....

LA Times Writer Kicks Off Finals Fever With Questionable Paul-Pierce-Stabbing "Joke"
Championships are great. They force cities to lambaste other cities, get mayors to make cutesy bets with each other and let writers fire up the ol' Template-O-Tron 5000 and write "Guide to Hating [Opponent]" columns. The LA Times's Ted Green began early....

Yankees Fans Pull Ahead In Basebrawl Standings
Ah, spring. When a young man's fancy turns to getting loaded and fighting other young men at a sporting event. This video, taken at a recent Rays-Yankees game covers all the hits: a brief brawl, people shouting "YouTube," and finger-pointing galore....

Tampa Bay Ray Falls Prey To Actual Stingray
Sean Rodriguez was stung in the surf off of St. Pete Monday. Geez, lose the first two to Boston, and already the ocean is rebelling. Or maybe the Ray was just another Northeast transplant. [St. Petersburg Times]...

"Tall Pitcher and Short Stop." This Fall On NBC!
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Young Boozer Carries On Boozer Family Tradition In Alabama
Meet Young Boozer III, future state treasurer of Alabama. His dad, Young Boozer Jr., played football for the Crimson Tide and was Bear Bryant's roommate. Alabama continues to be awesome....

Watch A Waitress Get Absolutely <em>Trucked</em> At An AFL Game
The good part about Arena Football — the front row is right on top of the players. The bad part, for one Orlando waitress, is that the players occasionally end up in the front row. [NFL.com]...

Was This Sports Blog Post Written By A Sports Blogging Robot Who Might Be Evolving Into A Less-Bad Writer?
No. But if it were, you might not know! At least, that's sort of the premise of this follow-up about an army of sportswriting robots — you know, the ones that may just render sports writing obsolete. Except, they won't....

Drew Brees, <em>Times-Picayune</em> Leave The Yard In Entirely Different Ways
"A packed house at Zephyr Field learned two things Wednesday night. One, that child sexual abuse is a big problem, and two, that New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees can smack home runs from either side of the plate." [Times-Picayune; related]...