aba Page 140 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Here's A Video Of A Hot Chick Wearing Gator Colors And A 6'5" Guy Who Probably Won't Live Much Longer
The Florida/Alabama kickoff ain't for six days but after this video makes the rounds, the pack of Crimson Tide fans seeking blood shall form at the "northwest side of the stadium" or "Gate 42, Section U-1, Row 1, Seats 3-8."...

The One Where A Lady Sends Us Pictures Of Her Boobs In The Hope Of Getting A Job (NSFW)
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. If you're new, read this to figure out what we do here. If not, well, let's get down to business. (NSFW)...

Last Night's Winner: Felix Hernandez's Chances Of Not Getting Jobbed Out Of A Cy Young
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Felix Hernandez, who probably locked up his Cy Young last night along about the time the Rays hung their seventh run on CC Sabathia....

Little Kid Definitely Does Not Want To Be Put In The Auburn Store
This tyke has an SEC-Speed meltdown at the mall after a seemingly empty threat. Laugh now, until it comes out that "The Auburn Store" is code for some kind of sex dungeon. [via Gossip Sports]...

God Gave Mark Dantonio A Heart Attack For Beating Notre Dame, Says Soon-To-Be-Suspended Radio Guy
We said it's time to let the MSU/ND game go. Matt Patrick, of a South Bend talk radio station, should probably have read us before he insinuated that God struck Dantonio down for cheating against the Catholics....

Here's a Video of a Cat on the Turntables
Meet DJ Kitty. He's kind of a rally monkey but from the looks at this official MLB video of him attempting to get Tampa Bay Rays fans to jumpjumpjump..., he's got strings all over him for marketing's sake. [MLB.com]...

Guy Without Arms or Legs Swims the English Channel
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Naked Photo Of Someone Who's Probably Not Nick Saban's Daughter Is About To Go Viral
It started off with an email from a man named David: "Any interest in Nick Saban's daughter, who is a sophomore at Alabama, topless?" And then some other dude sent us the pic rapidly circulating around SEC cell phones. (NSFW)...

Oh Look, Someone Compared a South Carolina Win to 9/11 (Updated)
You gotta hand it to Doug Jolley of the illustrious GameCockAnthem.com. He captures what an early-season SEC loss must feel like....

Moroccan Keeper Jumps The Gun In Penalty Shootout
Hilarious scenes during a penalty shootout between Moroccan top division teams Maghreb Fez and FAR Rabat, in the brilliantly named ‘Throne Cup'....

Last Night's Winner: Mike Krzyzewski, Restarting The Cold War
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the revival of Soviet-American tensions, exacerbated by a little trash talking from Coach K at the FIBA World Championships. Duck and cover, kids...

Now We Know Where MLS Stands In The Sports Pecking Order, And It's Not Pretty
The KC Wizards are forced to reschedule a game because the semi-pro Kansas City T-Bones need the stadium for a Northern League playoff game that night. Let's hope the new date doesn't conflict with any 4-H meetings. [KCWizards.com]...

For Fuck's Sake, Bama Fans
Tide fans spend way too much time debating whether this cloud looks like Bear Bryant, or maybe "Abe Lincoln on a personal watercraft." Way to live up to your stereotypes, folks. [ABC33, via EDSBS]...

Download Those MLB Financial Statements For Your Own Enjoyment
By popular demand, here are those MLB documents as PDF files: Pittsburgh Pirates; Pirates again; Florida Marlins; Tampa Bay Rays; Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim; and Seattle Mariners. The Rangers' Excel files can be downloaded here and here. Enjoy....

Waiver Wire Drama Sends AL East Into A Tizzy
The Red Sox's nefarious plan to lose a bunch of games finally comes to fruition, as they put in a claim on Johnny Damon — to block the Rays from landing him. [Boston Herald]...

Spider-Man 2: Yet Another Japanese Outfielder Makes Incredible Catch
Mere weeks after introducing the world to the original Spider-Man's home run saving grab, it happens again. Same ballpark, same teams, same pitcher on the mound....

MLB Confidential: The Financial Documents Baseball Doesn't Want You To See, Part 1
We've obtained financial statements for a number of baseball teams — containing perhaps some of the most closely guarded information in sports — and they offer a rare glimpse at how MLB franchises do brisk business in the modern era....

Alabama Candidate Uses Horrible Photoshop To Gain Nick Saban's "Endorsement"
A Bessemer, Ala., mayoral candidate put a picture of her and Coach Saban on a campaign poster. It looks shopped. I can tell from some of the pixels and from seeing quite a few shops in my time....

Is Jorge Posada a Stone-Cold Killer?
Here's slo-mo footage of the Yankees catcher's home-run yesterday at whatever field the Kansas City Royals "play" on....
