aba Page 76 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jimmy Butler Did Not Enjoy That Football Game
The Wolves whomped the Cavs last night, 127-99, as LeBron James played one of the spottiest games of his career. But for Jimmy Butler—heard here hollering in the background—the night’s real emotional stakes only came afterwards, as he watched the final moments of the college football championship. K...
On Final Play, Tua Tagovailoa Took Everything Georgia Gave Him<em></em>
Tua Tagovailoa turned the Alabama offense into something it hasn’t been in living memory: fun. The true freshman, cannon-armed, fleet-legged quarterback who hadn’t played a snap of football that wasn’t in garbage time came on at halftime against Georgia and utterly transformed the moribund Crimson T...
Alabama's National Championship-Winning Touchdown, As Called On Radio & TV Around The Globe
As is our tradition, it’s time for us to compare how broadcasters on radio & TV locally, nationally, and internationally called DeVonta Smith’s 41-yard overtime touchdown pass from Tua Tagovailoa:...
Alabama Completes Comeback With Legendary Overtime Touchdown By Backup Quarterback<em></em>
Alabama overcame being shut out at the half to beat Georgia in overtime, 26-23, to win this year’s College Football Championship national championship. ...
What Weird New Behavior Will Donald Trump Display At The National Championship Game?<em></em>
A year and change into his first term in office, it’s still honestly kind of hard to tell why Donald Trump ran for president. At this point, we know enough about him to assume both 1) that it had nothing to do with any of the reasons he offered on the campaign trail and 2) that it’s probably somethi...
Your <i>Tecmo Super Bowl</i> National Championship Simulation Is LIVE
It’s time for everyone’s favorite tradition: the CPU vs CPU simulation of tonight’s national championship game, using the original Tecmo Super Bowl on NES with fully-updated rosters. CLICK THROUGH TO WATCH:...
Dan Girardi Leaves Game After Taking A Slap Shot To The Head
Tampa Bay Lightning defenseman Dan Girardi suffered a brutal injury in the second period of the team’s 5-2 win against the Red Wings Sunday night. As Detroit’s Martin Frk fired a one-timer from the faceoff circle, Girardi went down on one knee to try and block it from close range. Frk’s shot hit G...
Alabama Strength Coach Obliterates Last Year's Runner-Up Trophy
If you are not PUMPED UP and ready to THROTTLE MEDIOCRITY after watching cartoonishly burly Alabama strength coach Scott Cochran SHATTER Crimson Tide’s second-place trophy from last year’s College Football Playoff final with gravity and also a large hammer, then you’re not ready to TACKLE GREATNESS....
Nick Saban Found Something To Grump About
Two days after his team won its College Football Playoff semifinal and advanced to the national title game for the third straight year, Alabama head coach Nick Saban groused that there was only one week between semifinals and the championship. This has more or less been the case since the College Fo...
Alabama Beats Clemson, Sets Up All-SEC Championship Game
Alabama manhandled top seed Clemson 24-6 in a downer of a Sugar Bowl unworthy of being the headliner to the double-OT Rose Bowl opening act, and now you’re all going to enjoy a week of gripes about the SEC and the Tide vs. Georgia national championship matchup. Our response to those complaints is th...
319-Pound Defensive Lineman Da'Ron Payne Gets Interception, Catches TD Pass In Five-Minute Span
Alabama’s Da’Ron Payne pushes well past 300 pounds and bench presses 500. He is a large man. Here’s the large man catching two passes in five minutes—one of them from his own team, for a touchdown—and making us all very happy to be alive. Except for those of us who went to Clemson, and I didn’t go t...
Sean Payton And Dirk Koetter Get Into Weird Chest-Slapping Contest During Postgame Handshake
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers beat the New Orleans Saints 31-24 Sunday, and although the game didn’t carry too much weight, there were clearly feelings left over from the two teams’ first divisional matchup in November. During the postgame handshake, Saints head coach Sean Payton gave Bucs head coach Dir...
What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
If Christmas is all about putting stuff up butts, New Year’s Day is the day to read about the many methods of absolute destruction of America’s dick and balls, and to be thankful it wasn’t you. Unless it was....
Shabazz Napier Had One Of The Sickest Assists Of The Year
The Trail Blazers made a very impressive comeback against the 76ers tonight, starting the fourth quarter down 13 and finishing it as the victors, 114-110. In that final quarter, no one in Portland made a more amazing play than Shabazz Napier. With his team up four, Napier drove, drew two defenders, ...
Nikita Kucherov And Steven Stamkos Have Beautiful Chemistry<em></em>
Tampa Bay Lightning scorers Nikita Kucherov and Steven Stamkos have only been teammates since 2013, but at the end of the second period tonight against Montreal, the pair showed off the communication skills of a longtime married couple. As the Lightning pushed the puck down deep in the Canadiens’ zo...
Penn Scores 100 Points, Wins Fans Free Cheesesteaks
Penn achieved culinary satisfaction last night....
Report: Car Registered To DeSean Jackson Found Wrecked, Abandoned On Christmas Eve
A car registered to Buccaneers wide receiver DeSean Jackson was found abandoned on Sunday night in Tampa, Fla., according to a police report reviewed by NFL.com. The car, a Chevrolet Silverado, at some point struck a tree, and inside police found a misdemeanor-level amount of marijuana and two legal...
What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?
If it’s Christmas, it must be time to learn what America shoved inside itself. The only worthwhile holiday tradition pushes on....
Jameis Winston Melts Down After Panthers Comeback
Cam Newton scored a touchdown with 35 seconds left to push the Panthers past the Buccaneers, 22-19. On the ensuing drive, Jameis Winston fumbled on the first play after a sack from Kawann Short. Carolina defensive end Julius Peppers recovered. That’s when things got messy....
Rays Trade Away Face Of The Franchise For Bad Reasons
Various baseball insiders are reporting that the stove is hot this morning. Rays third baseman Evan Longoria has been shipped to the Giants in exchange for Denard Span and some other stuff:...