ac Page 1110 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Judge: No, You Can't Replace Volleyball With Cheerleaders
A federal judge has decreed that Quinnipiac can't just ax its women's volleyball team to trim the budget — especially when, you know, it wouldn't actually save money if the team is replaced by a new varsity cheerleading squad. Something about Title IX. Proceed with your day. [News-Times]...

The South Rises Again, And The NAACP Calls A Balk
The ACC voted recently to move its baseball tournament to Myrtle Beach from 2011-2013, but don't expect the NAACP to buy peanuts and cracker jacks. They're condemning the league for breaking a boycott of South Carolina, which flies the Confederate flag. The real beef: Myrtle? Seriously? [The Sun New...

Obama's Two Favorite Things Are The Steelers, Making Children Cry
A group of kindergarteners had their hearts broken yesterday when they showed up for a White House tour and were told they couldn't come in because staff had to prepare for the President's visit with the Pittsburgh Steelers. Also, because the tears of the innocent give Barack Obama sustenance....

Yankee Stadium Threatening To Get 100 Percent More Insufferable
Great news! The most obnoxiously self-indulgent team in college football wants to join forces with the most obnoxiously self-indulgent team in baseball. Yes, folks: Notre Dame wants to play football in shiny new Yankee Stadium....

Fake Ben Roethlisberger Has Internet Cancer
Terrible news, everybody. The cyber weirdo who is trolling the internet pretending to be Ben Roethlisberger has imaginary cancer. There's a PayPal link below where you can help send him an virtual bouquet of AOL sign-up CDs....

March Of The Cohn Heads
My ex-girlfriend, Linda Cohn, has started a new personal blog for her fans. There are lots of photos, words, etc.. And Cohn Heads. Plenty of Cohn Heads. [Linda Cohn Fan Club]...

Wife Of Pitcher Scott Schoeneweis Found Dead
Gabrielle Dawn Schoeneweis, the wife of Arizona Diamondbacks reliever Scott Schoeneweis, was found unconscious in the family's home today and sheriff's deputies were unable to revive her when they arrived. No cause of death has been determined yet. She was 39. Terrible news. [Arizona Republic]...

Rudy Giuliani's Son Loses The Case Of "Duke vs. Spackler"
Andrew Giuliani used to play golf at Duke University until the coach that recruited him died, and the new coach realized that he was a terrible golfer. Andy sued after being booted from the team and the judge made him look stupid by quoting Caddyshack as he dismissed the case....

Shocker: Larry King's Horsey Tale Is Full Of Holes
Yesterday, excerpting from his memoirs, Larry King spun a sweet little tale of hitting it big at the racetrack, thanks to a plucky horse named Lady Forli. Are you sitting down? It's all a lie!...

Rich Person Wonders Why Rich People Are So Bad At Sports
"It seems logical that children of privilege who have access to world-class coaching and state-of-the-art facilities should develop professional-level talent, but for some reason that almost never happens." The answer, he says, "is elusive." [VF.com]...

James Harrison Has A Fear Of Flying, Not Of White House
Just when James Harrison became 1000% scarier due to his seemingly bizarre decision and reasoning to not visit the White House with his Steeler teammates, we find out he's not the anti-authoritarian lunatic we thought....

A Day At The Races, With Larry King!
Item: CNN's Larry King, the former USA Today Beat poet and godfather of Twitter, has a new memoir dropping. Today's excerpt, in which a down-and-out Larry hits the racetrack, is as awesome as you'd expect....

Jim Edmonds: Cougar Bait
This not-so-young lady walked into the centerfelder's 15 Club in St. Louis with a little black dress and a white-stripped smile and walked out with a "Jim Edmonds Mowed My Lawn" t-shirt. [St. Louis Today]...

A Sad Postmortem On NYT's <em>Play</em> Magazine
Sigh. Columbia's New York Review of Magazines has a lengthy look at the "the short, happy, tragic life" of Play, the Times' much-beloved sports magazine and, for my money, sportswriting's last good shot....

Yep, Brett Favre Is Definitely Coming Back
Non-retired football star Brett Favre has called in Dr. Andrews and will (reportedly!) have surgery on his bicep next week—which is not something a 39-year-old typically does unless he wants to play more professional football....

Adam Burish Survives Horrifying Decapitation Attempt
The Blackhawks lost Game One of the Western Conference Finals yesterday, but Burish's head is still attached to the rest of his body so I guess he has that going for him. Teammate Ben Eager got tangled up with a Red Wing player in the second period and his foot—you know the one with the freshly shar...

Jack Kerouac's Fantasy Baseball Dorkdom
Jack Kerouac led a busy life boozing, writing, bee-bopping, and banging Neal Cassady's wife, but he was also quite the nerdsworth when it came to fantasy baseball. Heavy emphasis on the "fantasy."...

Red Hawks. Black Wings. Open Thread.
Puckheads...enjoy. [Yahoo Sports]...

John Lackey's Two-Pitch Debut Was Inspiring
What's with pitchers throwing at Ian Kinsler? First it was Bobby Jenks' $750 high heat, and now Angels' starter John Lackey decided the Rangers' second baseman needed a good plunking....