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Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee
As the world holds its collective breath awaiting official word on Tom Brady's knee injury, bloggers are working through their apprehension and grief the only way they know how; with wild, panicky speculation. Here's a sampling ... • A Letter From God Addressed To New England Patriot Fans. Let's fac...

Tom Brady Possibly Done For The Season
Yahoo! Sports' Michael Silver is reporting that Tom Brady might be out for the year with ligament damage to his knee. ...

Reebok Benches Ocho Cinco
Those of you who watched the Bengals game today and were expecting Chad OchoCinco got Chad Johnson instead. At the last minute, Chad was forced to wear a "C. Johnson" nameplate on his jersey. Apparently, while the NFL has decided not to get in his way, Reebok wants their money. ...

NFL Season Previews: Philadelphia Eagles
The NFL season has officially started, so it's time to finish the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Clearly, these previews will be running until, o...

Ocho Cinco's Name Change Papers Reveal His Creative Kids' Names
Tired of hearing about Chad Ocho Cinco yet? Me neither. The Smoking Gun has his name change documents and while they are mostly unexciting, we've learned a few things about the man. Apparently he claims to have no ulterior reasons for changing his name. I guess "Sticking it to Roger Goodell" wasn't ...

Nightmare Ant Shall Have His Revenge, In This Life Or The Next
I've always said it: Deadspin will never really make it until we can count D-League basketball owners among our readership. Well now we've achieved that lofty goal. In an open letter in his blog on Thursday, Ft. Wayne Mad Ants co-owner Jeff Potter described last month's thrilling Deadspin Hall of Fa...

Chase Utley Ain't No Broad, According To Charlie Manuel
As the Phillies maintain their pursuit of The Bastard Mets in the National League East, there were some questions about whether or not this team was capable of hanging on through this final month of the season due to an overall lack of clubhouse leadership. There are no shit-stirrers, save for the o...

The Beijing Bureau Says Goodbye
The Olympics have ended, yet our three young lads who dutifully covered them for Deadspin for the past month are still there. They've requested a farewell post. Here it is. Things are pretty quiet here at the Bureau now that the Olympics have (mercifully) ended. Media organizations around the world ...

A Tale Of Two Cycles
I guess Stephen Drew isn't a big name, except for writers of slash fiction. All he did on Monday was hit for the cycle, and AP called him Scott Drew (11th graph). Later Monday, Adrian Beltre also hit for the cycle. What are odds of two players hitting for the cycle on the same day? About the same as...

Tom Brady to Miss a Month?
Make of this what you will, but there is a yet-to-be-confirmed rumour floating out there that Tom Brady's foot injury may be worse than he's been letting on. Like, "out for four games" worse. From NFL Juice: ...
![Pre-Draft Fantasy Update: Fred Taylor To Split Carries, Arrested [UPDATED]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18s6bmaogsulyjpg.jpg)
Pre-Draft Fantasy Update: Fred Taylor To Split Carries, Arrested [UPDATED]
It's stories like this that give the phrase "arrested at 4 a.m. outside a South Beach Club" a bad name. Miami Beach police charged Jacksonville Jaguars running back Fred Taylor with disorderly conduct yesterday outside the awesomely named "Club Cristal". Taylor wasn't jailed, but instead pinky-swore...

Utes and Young Manhood
Nice storyline from today's Michigan/Utah game: Paul Kruger, victim of a vicious stabbing earlier this year, is playing for the Utes. Utah's starting defensive end, along with his younger brother Dave and teammate Greg Newman, were attacked back in January by a group of unknown tough guys outside a ...

Just Don't Follow Him to Any Golden Clubs
You've got to give the kid credit: he does not shy away from insurmountable expectations. After following in his father's legendary footsteps at Georgetown, Patrick Ewing Jr., son of NBA Hall of Famer (scans NBA almanac) Patrick Ewing, is now a New York Knick. It's already Junior's third team, and h...

Aye Carumba! Chad Johnson Changes Last Name To Ocho Cinco
So Bengals wideout Chad Johnson has legally changed his name to "Chad Javon Ocho Cinco." Which I guess is only slightly better than "Chad Javon GoldenPalace.com." Chad expects to play in the Bengals' season opener, despite suffering a dislocated shoulder in the preseason and creating more needlework...

Cops Tell Different Tale About Fan Who Was Ejected Over "God Bless America"
The above video is of Yankee Stadium God-dismissing, anti-American Brad Campeau Laurion who enlightened us (and, seemingly, hundreds of other media outlets) about being forcibly escorted out of Yankee Stadium Tuesday night after he tried to go to the bathroom during the traditional 7th-inning rendi...

Kid Who Fell Onto Field Further Traumatized By Dopey Matt Lauer Interview
It pays to be a klutz in Philadelphia: The kid who tumbled from the stands onto the warning track at Citizens Bank Ballpark on Thursday woke up the next day to new-found celebrity, collecting a bunch of Phillies memorabilia, game tickets and a trip to New York for an interview on the Today Show. The...

Bow Wow, The Game Wager $100k on Madden 09 Contest
No word on whether field goals are allowed. The loser's donating the money to charity. And by money I mean, part of the record company's marketing budget. Which then becomes a tax deduction. Bow Wow (nee Shad Moss), who will also be appearing in the upcoming season of Entourage (that's really unfor...

Mitch "Wild Thing" Williams Ringing The NASDAQ Opening Bell Tomorrow
This is the most incongruous pairing of sports and the financial markets since Lenny Dykstra first emailed Jim Cramer. How did this happen? What in the world has the Wild Thing been up to since his baseball career ended? He started his own Wild Thing Southpaw Salsa. Well, of course he did. Mitch Wi...

This Is Why Rock Fights Are Fun
So, there was this predictable exchange between the front desk guy in my apartment building and another guy as I went out to grab some smokes while the Phillies were down 7-1 in the 4th inning last night to the Mets. "Of course they'd come down to earth. Take 4 from the Dodgers then they get blown o...

Mr. Met Sez: Damn It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta
If there's one thing I've learned in this world, it's that you do not f—- with Mr. Met. He has a bad attitude and a collection of shivs he made in prison, so watch out. Just look at this photo, where Mr. Met is saying "Don't f—- with my hos, or I will STICK YOU, man!" And witness the video following...