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VCU Has Now Forced Its Unbearable Victory Song Upon Us
Your morning roundup for March 30, the day Peter Venkman signed on to play FDR....

Chad Ochocinco's Soccer Career Gets Shown A Red Card
Your morning roundup for March 29, the day we got arrested for going helicopter waterskiing....

The Weeping Kansas Jayhawk, In Happier Times
Your morning roundup for March 28, the day Lindsay became the artist formerly known as Lindsay Lohan....

Let's Start The Day With A Story About Kindness
Your morning roundup for March 27, the day people continue to concern themselves with Dennis W. Peterson losing his front teeth at a Hooters....

Richmond Fought The Good Fight Against Kansas Until The Game Started
Your morning roundup for March 26, when James Corley of Conroe, Texas mulls the misfortune of not stopping after his 15th DUI conviction. Now, he'll have 99 years to practice counting to 1,030....

Cockblocked By The Evening News!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Jimmer Left The Court With A Bandage On His Chin, But Kyle Singler Probably Saw His Mom Crying
Your morning roundup for March 25, the day rockhopper penguins fight for their oil-slicked lives....

Let's Watch Some Guy Named Vinny D. Dispense Love Advice
To quote Vinny D. of FloodTheClub.com party promotions on Strong Island (and tha boroughs), "Stay single. Have a good time. There's no parole officer. There's no cop. There's nobody to answer to at the end of the night. I mean, your mother stops being your mother when you turn 18. You don't need a...

Identity Of The Lady Who Bared Her Rump For All To See In The Seventies Is Finally Exposed
Your morning roundup for March 24, the day an 8.5-point underdog taps into its inner Jersey Shore, all Socs-versus-Greasers style....

Horny 92-Year-Old Woman Couldn't Get A Kiss, So She Got Her Gun
When 92-year-old Helen Staudinger's boytoy neighbor Dwight Bettner refused to kiss her on Monday, she turned her .380 semi-automatic pistol on 'im. She missed, but it's the thought that counts....

Elizabeth Taylor, As Remembered By Fake Robert Evans
In light of the recent passing of Hollywood screen icon Liz Taylor, we asked legendary Hollywood producer and Jamboroo contributor Robert Evans to join us to share some of his fondest memories of the actress. Take it away, Mr. Evans....

Derrick Rose Made This Young Hawks Fan Cry
Your morning roundup for March 22 23, the day Glenn Beck contemplated launching his own channel, and we all contemplated launching ourselves off bridges....

Jerking Off In Congress: A Bipartisan Debate
Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Find more of Drew's stuff at KSK or on Twitter. Email the Funbag here. Today, we're covering semen, allergies, boogers, and more....

Bruce Pearl Between Rock And Hard Place
Your morning roundup for March 22, the day our road signs finally warned us of the zombie menace....

Even Through The Tears, Young Texas Fan Manages A Brave Hook 'Em Horns
Your morning roundup for March 21, the day shots were fired over the price of a Beefy Crunch Burrito....

The Man Born Without A Right Leg Is America's Best 125-Pound Wrestler
Your morning roundup for March 20, the day Haitian frustrations still have a Fugee in hand pain....

Taking a Punch Like a Man — Just Not From One
Felice Herrig has taken a punch from a man before. Many. She's also hit back. Hard. She's a mixed martial arts fighter, in a comparatively small population of women professionals, and, like it or not, in many gyms her only… [Kotaku] ...

Your Early Round-Of-32 Games Open Thread
In the early game, a Kentucky team that barely beat Princeton faces a West Virginia team with a coach who's 8-1 against the head Wildcat....

LeBron James Turned The Atlanta Hawks Into The Cleveland Cavaliers For 12 Minutes
Your morning roundup for March 19, the day after it became wise to snatch a few domain names ending in ".xxx"....
