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To Get The Benefit Of It, Honey, You Really Need To Be Sitting In Our Seat
You didn't say we shouldn't do that ever again; you said we ain't ever gonna do that again. You said not only are we never gonna play ship's mast again, you also said if you ever do what you're trying to do now, to not only refuse, but that we had permission to physically restrain your ass if necess...

Some Minor Changes Around These Here Parts
You might have noticed some changes around here — not least of which tech issues that didn't allow us to put up our first post until 10 a.m. — so we thought we'd try to walk you through the best we understand, which is to say, not much at all....

Week In Deadspin: We Can Watch Baseball Again
• Baseball's back! • Bill Simmons, staying above ground. • Nothing is funnier than when Frank Thomas pegs a child. • Even though the team's not looking so hot right now, Cardinals fans remain the best. • Beer bong! • Don't fag out on us now, Packer. • We never made it to Atlanta, but Florida didn't ...

We Now Return You To "The Man From Rio" Already In Progress
Now Ted, a person's life is filled with a zillion little experiences. Some which are insignificant, have no meaning, and, you know, you forget them. Others, you remember for the rest of your natural life. Now, since what we're proposing here is so unusual, so outside the norm, this is a good bet tha...

Meet Your D—-spin Pants Party Winner (Kind Of)
Well, the final standings are in from the D—-spin Pants Party Pool, and we have a mostly anonymous winner we suspect we'll be hearing from today....

Week In Review: Yes, Virgina, There Is A Final Four
• Screw off, Selig. • Goodbye, George Solomon. • Peyton Manning blows us away with his ability to be vaguely amusing. • Look what happens when you get these guys together in a room. • Dance, Gus Johnson, dance. • Duke ladies. • See ya, Joe Theismann. • You, too, can coach the Wolverines. • David Hir...

Don't Smoke Crack. It's A Ghetto Drug
Some people will work / Some never will / But they'll complain and complain and complain and complain and complain ......

Nothing Better Than A Sports Dad
Sports dads creep us out, generally speaking, and yeah: Dads of world-class female athletes actually do creep us out more, whether that's fair or not. We have no children, but if we did, we think we would discourage them to play sports, or at least discouraging them to do so around us. We think, lik...

Your Final Four Pants Party Update
All right, with just three games left in the NCAA Tournament, we thought we'd check in with the ole D—-spin Pants Party NCAA Tournament pool....

Week In Deadspin: Live Forever
• Barbaro ... the Chee-to! • Ahhhhhhh! • Iowa wants to control exactly who wants to fire their coaches. • Boy, the NIT sure is exciting. • Don't worry, you're not weird for reading more ESPN than FoxSports. • If you have a low seed, you will take your rat hotel and you will LIKE it. • Tony LaRussa s...

You More Or Less Walk With A Limp
Who should we sleep with, Terry? Women like you? Your age? Our age? We don't. You know why? 'Cause younger women are nice. You take them out, and they're actually grateful. "Oh look, a steak. Yummy." You go for a walk after dinner, the air smells nice, they say, "Thank you. This was nice. This was f...

Look, It's A Survey! Wee!
Sometimes the Gawker folks ask us to give you surveys....

Checking In On The Pants Party
On this tournament off-day, we thought we'd check in and see how our D—-spin Pants Party pool on ESPN was going....

Week In Deadspin: Waiting For Upsets
• We can't look at these NBAer photos enough. • We had many tournament previews. • ESPN has many enemies. Including us! • This kid loves some N.C. State. • Misinterpreting Pete Rose. • Tommy Lasorda, sleeping and dreaming. • Blah blah blah, Syracuse is pissed, blah blah blah. • Aw ... Duke lost. Dam...

Dirty Dee, You're A Baddy Daddy Lamatai Tabby Chai
Follow The NCAA Live Blog!...

Final Hour For Deadspin Pants Party Pool
All right, kids, we're just more than an hour from the beginning of this whole NCAA tournament business — Who has Maryland-Davidson fever? We do, we do! — and this is pretty much your last chance to Join The Deadspin Pants Party tournament pool. As of this typing, there are 3,315 people in the pool,...

The Big Deadspin PDF Preview Is Here
For those of you who like to have a handy, printed-out guide to bring with to the bar for the start of the tournament tomorrow, hey, you're in luck. Like last year, we have compiled all our NCAA tournament capsules into an easy-to-handle, digestible, HAPPY FUN TIME pretty PDF file for all your NCAA ...

Join The D—-spin Pants Party Pool!
All right, it wouldn't be the NCAA tournament if we weren't overkilling the entire thing with endless previews, discussions, tidbits and, of course ... our yearly tournament pool....

Welcome To The Frothing-At-The-Mouth Insanity
We'll get more into our thoughts on the bracket tomorrow — and before you yell at us, we really didn't expect Illinois to make it, and we're far from certain they deserve it ... not that we mind! — but first off, we wanted to get our Deadspin PDF bracket up there and ready for you ASAP....

Week In Review: Sixteen Candles
• Screw off, Selig. • Good night, George Solomon. • Rough week for Ron Borges. • No guns at Miami? Wha? • We're wearing one of these right now. • Competitive wanking. • Billy Packer minister of information. • Father knows best. • Speaking of which, Tom Brady, hitting open receivers. • Peyton Manning...