ale Page 244 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Wait 'Til Next Year (When It Grows Out)
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Tom Izzo Might Be The New Cavs Coach
Tom Izzo might be telling his MSU players that he intends to take the Cavaliers position; Dick Vitale might be wrong; and any grad students in the 216 might hold off on getting a new cellphone. Your move, Tad Carper. [WFNY]...
Chicago Faces Epidemic Of Jersey-Wearing Statues
It is official: Chicago is a hockey town. If the Michael Jordan statue is wearing Hawks threads, it's only a matter of time before Mayor Daley is mispronouncing players' names and crudely dyeing the city's fountain waters red. Oh wait....
A-Rod Ignores Unwritten Rule About Reveling In Near-Death Of Opponent
David Huff thanked Alex Rodriguez for going to visit him in the hospital after A-Rod's line drive nearly broke Huff's brain. That's not how they do things in the 209! In the 209, they would have urinated on Huff's prone body! [Facebook]...
Kendry Morales's Brittle Leg Teaches Us A Valuable Lesson About...Something
Someone in that Angels dugout is kicking themselves for not just simply wishing Morales "good luck" before coming to the plate in the tenth, instead of saying "break a leg." Ugh, that was terrible. I apologize....
Simona Halep Loses The Boobs, Loses
Simona Halep did indeed show up to the French Open significantly less top-heavy than she was a year ago, but she still lost in the first round. Hey, you don't just bounce back from something like that. [Mirror/Daily Mail]...
40-Year-Old Video Exonerates A-Rod In Dumb Mound-Crossing Controversy
This is a screengrab from the 1971 World Series. And will you look at that? A batter runs across the mound, and somehow the world doesn't launch into a spasm of cock-waggling outrage over a breach of baseball's supposedly inviolable unwritten rules....
Santana Moss Is Your PED Bogeyman Of The Moment
According to the Washington Post, Moss received SCARY SCARY DRUG Human Growth Hormone from Canadian pixie Anthony Galea. [Washington Post]...
Canadian HGH Doc Charged, Inevitable NFL Leaks Ahead
Anthony Galea was charged today in connection with smuggling HGH into the country, and three star witnesses are unnamed NFL players. When their names invariably come out, will the witch hunt begin?...
What To Do With Hanley Ramirez?
Ramirez embarrassed his team by jogging after a ball. His manager returned the favor, benching him immediately thereafter. Ramirez spouted off to the press about it. We've got a problem here that can't be fixed by the usual news cycle....
A Special Balls Deep Message To The Class Of 2010
It's graduation time across the country. I've done this post the past two years running, and I don't see new college grads getting any less annoying. So we'd best do it again....
Dallas Braden's Dumb Feud With A-Rod Manages To Get Dumber
The A's lefthander took exception a few weeks ago when A-Rod ran across the mound, a violation of one of a thousand unwritten rules in baseball that remain unwritten for the simple reason that they're stupid. And we're still talking about it....
Bobby V Comes Out Of The Closet As Someone Who Doesn't Quite Understand The Closet Metaphor
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...
Jason Campbell Traded to the Raiders, LenDale White and Leon Washington Go to the Seahawks
Said Campbell to ESPN: "I talked to [Al] Davis, and he... wants me to help their team to a new level." Presumably Davis meant the 9th level, so he can take over for Lucifer in a frozen lake of ice....
Ovechkin Gives Child A Snow Shower
Ovie stops short, spraying the Canadiens tyke. Probably all in good fun (and part over Ovechkin's pregame routine), but still: wouldn't it have been great if the kid had dropped the gloves?...
Farewell, Peggy Noonan
The Deadspin part-time author is moving on with life/work. We wish her the best of luck. [Gawker]...
Color Me Fucking Shocked: Dick Vitale Loves Tim Tebow
You had to know Vitale would have a chubby for Tebow, the embodiment of heart. It was inevitable. The college basketball sportscaster chimes in today with an unbearable column about why Tebow should be taken high in the draft....
Anyone Want A Photo Of David Aardsma's Penis?
The Mariners closer has allegedly taken a nude photo of himself and sent it to someone via cell phone, and now one enterprising individual wants to find it a suitable home....