ant Page 697 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Draft Kevin Durant Meets Its Namesake
You may remember the great Draft Kevin Durant site, which implored the Blazers to draft Durant over Greg Oden. One might say the pick worked out well for both the Sonics and the Blazers; the Sonics have their franchise player to take with them to Oklahoma City and the Blazers are the NBA's hottest t...
Today's Episode: Isiah Has An Epiphany
Skeets is off celebrating Christmas Eve the way that all Canadians do; pantsless and migrating with a herd of elk. So your NBA Closer today is being written by United States Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Alphonso Jackson. Do enjoy....
Tony Romo Distracted By Watching Marion Barber Run Through Linebackers
I'm sure everyone involved in the Dallas Cowboys organization would love to get home to their families by Sol Invictus, but they all have some unfinished business even after beating the Carolina Panthers 20-13 last night....
Jessica Simpson Won't Be In Romo's Head, More Like Against It
It might seem a skosh ridiculous that Carolina Panthers fans are going balls out on this Jessica Simpson cutout distraction thingy tonight against Tony Romo and the Dallas Cowboys, considering that Terrell Owens has said repeatedly that Simpson really isn't a distraction to the team after all. So th...
Florida Atlantic Is Used To Sticking It To Tennessee Schools
Knowing that Howard Schnellenberger built Florida Atlantic's football program using nothing but MacGyver-approved ingredients in a seven-year span, last night's victory over Memphis in the New Orleans Bowl is an extremely uplifting story. They really came out of nowhere to steal the title of Best Up...
Playoff Ball In December
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or stretching, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy!...
The Day Your Fantasy League Went Nuts
Just about any fantasy team that's had any sort of success this season has had either Tony Romo or Tom Brady as their quarterback. Both have had outstanding seasons that few expected; in our own league, one guy has Brady and Randy Moss. He has been dominating all season. Until yesterday....
Duncan Returns, Does Little, Spurs Still Win
The NBA Closer is still written by me. I only kept this awkward italicized intro here so I could link to The Basketball Jones podcast. Why? Because hits brings a big ol' smile to Tas' face. Enjoy!...
He's Baaaaaaaaaaack!
If it were up to me I would not be reposting this. I find 'Nightmare Ant' creepy, intimidating and more than a little demonic. But the truth is, I have very little control over this site anymore. Neither does Will. Yeah, it's 'Nightmare Ant' calling the shots now. And if 'Nightmare Ant' wants his ph...
About Last Night
What you missed while sitting in a giant inflatable snow globe ... • College Football. Appalachian St. becomes Div. I-AA's first three-peat champs. • NBA. Rip City re-rising; Blazers win sixth straight 99-91 over Utah. • NHL. Bloody Alexei Ponikarovsky scores two; Leafs thrash Atlanta 4-0. (And yes,...
Bobby Cox And Friends
This picture was taken at a recent charity event in Atlanta for homeless pets. We cannot put a finger on why it mesmerizes us so, but man, it does. We feel like we just watched that home movie in "The Ring." And we're not sure why. But hey: No Chipper in the steroid report!...
Lawyer Milloy Is A Demon With The Red Pen
New Arkansas coach Bobby Petrino wrote this nice little letter to his team after bolting on them in the middle of the season. (Wisely, but still.) Falcons cornerback Lawyer Milloy was eager to add his own addendum....
We Congratulate "Florida Quarterback" On His Heisman Trophy
One of the nice things about college athletes is that you don't have to pay them. Heck, it might be the best thing about college athletes. Seriously, look at them: They can put their bodies and lives on the line every week, and we don't have to give 'em nothin'. Amazing, right? And if they do really...
Bobby Petrino Ends Up A Smashing Success In Atlanta
Ah, the halcyon days of January 7, 2007. Bobby Petrino was coming off a thrilling year as coach of Louisville, and he was seen as an offensive mastermind. He was Steve Spurrier, except, you know, he didn't mind working hard either. And then, very quickly, it all imploded....
Why Vick's Gonna Be In The Slammer So Long
We remember Ron Mexico's contrite, emotional press conference from August, when he nearly broke down and talked about his love for the Lord. We found it an impressive confession. His initial confession was a bit less graceful....
Tonight's Episode Of The Vick Bowl
Under normal circumstances, this would be what we'd call a "dull" Monday Night Football game, the Saints at the Falcons. In the wake of the Ron Mexico business today, it is upgraded/downgraded to "insufferable."...
Shake Your Rump For Jeremy Shockey
This is the time of year when everyone starts freaking out about their New Years Eve plans. If you're one of those hot ladies we keep hearing so much about, Jeremy Shockey has a potential party plan for you....
Tebow Wins Heisman, Loves Jesus
I didn't watch the Heisman Trophy presentation show (what's the point?) but I've been assured that Tim Tebow did in fact win. As a Gator fan of some 20 years I'm quite happy for Superman, but I'm not going to bludgeon you over the head with my homerism the way Tebow does with all of that god talk. O...
Mayweather Disposes of Hatton In 10
Floyd Mayweather Jr. is simply better than everybody else on the planet, and now even the Brits have to admit that. In front of a raucous crowd high rollers, A-list celebrities, and Manchester's loudest drunks (that's a compliment!) Mayweather went toe-to-toe with the previously undefeated Ricky Hat...
Submit Your Body Shots to Bruno Fierce
Craigslist is an almost endless source of entertainment if you're coming down off of a coke bender, otherwise it's good for the occasional laugh. Sometimes it's even a great source of information for the hot young trollops of New York who are looking for a chance to have champagne spilled on them by...