ant Page 699 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

I Hereby Demand That This Be Added To The Olympics
Where else but on Japanese television would one find something called Human Trebuchet; in which a person is flung by a large, wooden contraption into a distant net? And it looks pretty easy to build ... and suddenly, you are never late for an appointment again....

Manning "Reception" Is Everything You'd Imagine It Would Be
Sadly, there are no Village People moments like Brady Quinn had at his sister's wedding to A.J. Hawk, but if you do scroll through the lovely photo album, there are plenty of Manning-like moments that will clearly be cherished always. The New York Giants' quarterback appears to be coming out of his ...

Jelena Jankovic Gets Proactive About That Not-So-Fresh Feeling
You know, back in the days before I was married it used to take panties coming off to get me excited. Now panties going on does the trick just as well. In related news noted women's right advocate Justin Gimelstob announced that all women should play without panties on the WTA....

Introducing The Loneliest Boy In The World
Poor Brandon. Back in April of last year, the Barry Zito Fathead seemed like a very cool thing to have. But 170 innings and 24 losses later, this young man is not only reevaluating his choice of room decor, but also his very existence on this earth. Young Brandon is now a virtual shutin; ostracized ...

Meet The Stripper Who Saved The Red Sox
Alex Rodriguez's various alleged dalliances with females of the non-wife persuasion may have cost the Yankees more than anyone thought. Did ex-stripper Candice Houlihan break the Boston jinx and hand the Red Sox their World Series championship in 2004? Houlihan claims that a two-night stand with Rod...

Aaron Rowand Is The Illusionist
Well, the All-Star rosters are complete, except for one spot on each team. Internet voting to determine those last two spots ends on Thursday at 2 p.m. PST, and Aaron Rowand of the San Francisco Giants would like your vote. Following the jump you will find his campaign video. The action is from Frid...

Ritzy Town's Attempt To Keep Aaron McKie From Endangering Them Falls Short
Former NBA player Aaron McKie was nabbed for minor gun charges a couple of weeks ago, which prompted some of his soon-to-be Gladwyne, Pa. neighbors to start their own pamphleteering club in an attempt to warn others about his impending arrival....

Warriors To Be Decidedly Less Whiskery In 2009
OK, it's not a lock that Baron Davis is leaving the Warriors. But by opting out of the final year of his contract — leaving $17.8 million on the table in the process — it's pretty clear that there was more to that dustup with Don Nelson in the Phoenix game than we were told. But while that may be tr...

About Last Night
What you missed while celebrating your city's choice as the Nation's Sweatiest City ... • NBA: Jermaine O’Neal to be sent from Pacers to Raptors for T.J. Ford, Rasho Nesterovic, 17th pick in the draft and a player to be named. But it's not official yet, so don't spread this around. [Yahoo Sports] • ...

The Fantasy Impact Of Steven Jackson's Cleansed Colon
During yesterday's story about Rams running back Steven Jackson and his messy colon cleanse, I questioned the potential fantasy football impact such a procedure would have on the top five running back. Thankfully, some of the wise men from Yahoo!'s Fantasy Football think tank decided it was worthy ...

The Politically Incorrect Cow
There's no way we're not seeing that cow in our nightmares. We had no idea he was so ... tall....

ESPN Still Desperately Wants To Be Cool Again
A couple of years ago, some of ESPN's on-air talent was being lured away by another competing cable network that promised them a Daily Show-style vehicle, centered around sports instead of politics. Some were very interested — and some were very disappointed when the deal never went through, especia...

Shaquille O'Neal Won't Mince Words About Kobe Bryant
Gossip scoundrels TMZ have released probably one of the most entertaining videos you'll ever see in your whole entire life, as Phoenix Sun center Shaquille O'Neal revisits his Shaq-Fu roots and burns Kobe Bryant with an impromptu free-style at a New York City club....

Eli Manning And Wife In Desperate Need Of A Queer-Eyeing
The evolution of Eli Manning from underachieving dim-expressioned yokel to high society Super Bowl hero has hit a rough patch, as the fashionistas of the New York Post have lashed out at Eli and his new bride, Abby McGrew, for their questionable fashion sense during the recent snob-infested Contem...

About Last Night
The joke is on the leopard ... he got off at the wrong stop ... • It was awfully nice of the Lakers to allow the Celtics to win the NBA title at home. (NOTE: Should LA come back and win this, this post never happened. Got it?). • MLB: Yankees beat Astros 13-0, and you can make your own damned Wang j...

Paul Pierce Is One DUI Away From Becoming Carmelo Anthony
Come on. It's the NBA Finals. Only two teams should be relevant at this point. And since you can't walk three steps without sniffing the history of the Lakers-Celtics rivalry, you'd hope that someone would talk a little jive toward the other. It probably wouldn't be sportsmanlike, but it's definitel...

Delving Into That Creepy NASCAR Discrimination Case
Pretty sure we haven't mentioned that whole NASCAR $225 million racial/sexual discrimination lawsuit around these parts, perhaps because it appears to be so bad that Jason Whitlock said, "We owe Isiah Thomas and Sean Salisbury an apology." I'm not sure if I'd go that far, but if you haven't seen the...

Chipper Jones Is Hitting EVERYTHING This Season
And I mean everything. Don't believe me? let's go through the ways. He's hitting for power, hitting for average, hitting lefties, hitting righties, hitting to all fields, hitting fastballs, hitting breaking balls, hitting sideways and slantways and longways and backways and frontways and squareways ...

Kobe Bryant, Experienced Drinker
Of all the weird, vaguely insane things that Kobe Bryant has done in his weird, vaguely insane life — this is still our favorite — the most public and quietly strange might have been his claim at his press conference last night that he would go home and “whine about it tonight ... lot of wine ... lo...

Jay Gibbons Finally Finds A Home
After his rather famous letter to 29 major league teams recently in which he asked for another shot at baseball with a minor league contract, former Oriole and HGH connoisseur Jay Gibbons was rather surprised to get exactly zero offers. But determined to get back into the game somehow, Gibbons has p...