ants Page 115 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Miss USA Candidates Attempt To Answer A Question About Evolution, Fail At It
I'll warn you that this video, compiled and edited by the Miami New Times, is uniquely horrific. In it, Miss USA Pageant 2011 contestants attempt to answer — or simply to formulate words in a coherent sentence about the idea proposed — whether or not evolution should be taught in schools. The New ...

Cock-Sucking Son Of A Bitch MLB Players Were Warned About Swearing, Those Cunt-Lapping Bastards
As part of an 1898 campaign to curb the use of foul language in baseball, this memo was purportedly sent to every team. It stands as a fascinating record of Gay Nineties profanity, which doesn't actually sound outdated at all....

LeBron James Is STILL A Cocksucker
If you missed last night's schaudenfreudegasm with LeBron and the Heat getting lane-raped by J.J. Barea for 48 minutes, oh how you missed out. There hasn't been a more gratifying moment for sports haters since the Saints beat Favre and Manning back-to-back in the NFC title game and Super Bowl. It w...

Why Men Send Dong Shots To People
We've all had a good laugh about Anthony Weiner using his Twitter account to show the world that white Congressmen can have surprisingly decent-sized cocks. And we here at Deadspin have gotten a great deal of mileage out of men who, in fit of passion, decided to take pictures of their dicks and send...

OK, For The Last Time: Plaxico Burress Was Not Wearing Sweatpants The Night He Shot Himself
The night he busted a cap in his thigh, Plaxico Burress was wearing jeans. This is a fact confirmed both by the New York County District Attorney's Office and Burress himself. He was not wearing sweatpants. There is as much proof that he wore sweatpants that night as there is that he wore a crinolin...

Here's The Giants' "It Gets Better" Video
This isn't a huge thing, but it's a good thing. [Giants.com, Itgetsbetter.org]...

Buster Posey's Foot Bent The Wrong Way After A Home Plate Collision Last Night
Scott Cousins sealed a Marlins win in the 12th inning last night, by way of a full-force collision with Giants catcher Buster Posey at home plate. The tackle left Posey with a serious leg injury (in the last second-to-last angle here, especially, you can see his right ankle bend in such a way that...

I’ll Wear Shorts If I Goddamn Want To
Memorial Day weekend is coming to mark the start of summer, and once again I find myself confronted with assholes all over the place telling me I can't wear shorts. First there's designer Tom Ford:...

Cool Old Photos Show Willie Mays As You've Never Seen Him, I.E. Starting A Pillow Fight
Today, as they tend to do, the LIFE photography archives released a beautiful selection of never-before-seen photographs. The new collection, released 60 years to the day after Willie Mays' major league debut on May 25, 1951, is of the Hall of Famer's earlier years as a professional baseball player....

Barry Bonds Will Pay To Send Beaten Giants Fan's Kids To College
This is actually great: Barry Bonds, the star of Bob Costas's nightmares, will provide scholarships for Bryan Stow's two grade-school-age children. Stow was brutally beaten at Dodger Stadium in March for wearing a Giants jersey. His condition is slowly improving, and police recently arrested a suspe...

Tortured Analogy Leads Tiki Barber To Declare Himself A "Reverse Anne Frank"
The Tiki Barber image rehab tour kicks off in earnest (remember, he's planning to play again) with a big Sports Illustrated profile dropping tomorrow. In it, he tells a story of the time he went into hiding in the attic of his agent, Mark Lepselter....

In Making A Video About An Annoying Giants Fan, Dodgers Fan Proves To Be Equally Annoying
In the pro column, there's no violence in this "Behold, the world's most annoying Giants fan" video....

Bryan Stow Opens His Eyes, But Doctors Still Can't Predict His Chances Of Recovery
Bryan Stow, the 42-year-old paramedic and San Francisco Giants fan brutally beaten by a pair of moral-maggot Dodger fans who have yet to be caught but most certainly will sizzle in Hell if such a place exists, has shown signs of improvement in recent days. Opening his eyes. No seizure activity in h...

Here's The Voice Of Oregon State Sports, Drunk And Eating A Napkin At Denny's
This video's been floating around for a couple months under the description Drunk Man Eats Napkin At West Hollywood Denny's at 3:10 am. But this week, some folks near Corvallis noticed the subject looked a little familar. And indeed, it's Mike Parker, the radio play-by-play guy for the Beavers. Wh...

Today In Stories You Don't Have To Read Past The Headline
"Knife Wielding Robber Takes Bobble Head." [NBC Bay Area]...

To Celebrate Willie Mays's 80th, Here's A Rare Photo Of The Catch
Mays turns 80 today, and it's amazing that one of the greatest all-around baseball players ever can still be known for a single moment....

Some Drunk Giants Players Got Into It With Drunk Capitals Fans At A Hockey Game
In town to play the Nationals, a few members of the San Francisco Giants took in the Lightning/Capitals game yesterday. According to a fan who was there, there was some good-natured ribbing going on with the next luxury box over, including Pat Burrell telling a screaming fan that the players on the ...

Roger Goodell Is Going To Be A Big Baby About This Lockout Until The Very End
Yesterday we brought you the gripping tales of players showing up to training facilities, only to find nothing going on and heading home. But at least one team grew a pair for a few hours: the Giants not only let DT Chris Canty into the complex to work in the weight room, but he met with Tom Coughli...

It Sure Looks Like Brian Wilson's Pal The Machine Had A Lovely Day After The Closer's Hair-Metal Birthday Bash
About an hour and a half after the Brian Wilson Hair-Metal Birthday Extravaganza gallery was posted this time yesterday, tipster Kevin F. chimed in to say, "the beard's b-day has some nice pics, but the video from the baseball game the next day was better. The Machine streaks through the bleachers...

Semin Leads The Capitals To Sweet, Sweaty Extended-Time Victory
Your morning roundup for April 14, the day San Dimas High School football no longer rules in the eyes of the Chinese government....