apes Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Trump Conspiracy Theorists Are Losing Their Shit<em></em>
It’s not an easy time to be a Trump supporter. After all, the globalists are about to get their way, their once invincible champion has fallen at the hands of Billy Bush, and Truth as they know it as good as dead. The alt-right wingnuts are in panic mode, and the view is phenomenal....
Why Won't Tic Tac Renounce Donald Trump?
Late Friday afternoon, a collective shudder made its way across the nation as millions of people listened to a 2005 recording of Donald Trump explaining how he liked to grab women “by the pussy.” Since then, dozens of Republican lawmakers have publicly renounced Donald Trump and rescinded their endo...
Accused Serial Groper Arnold Schwarzenegger Denounces Confessed Groper Donald Trump
Now joining the parade of prominent Republicans who have declared that, as of yesterday, Donald Trump became insupportable: former California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. In a statement posted to Twitter, the muscleman and action-movie hero wrote: ...
Fine, The Cavs And The Warriors Are Going To Play Another Game
Noted Golden State Warriors stan and fanboy blogger Kevin Draper was too busy getting drunk tonight, so we’re the ones helping you cope with the game you watched. It was neither a memorable nor horrible game, but even the NBA gets a case of the Mondays. Here are some thoughts ......
Hum While You Eat; Gorillas Do
Maybe you hum a little tune while assembling a sandwich, and maybe even contentedly between good bites. You wouldn’t be the only one on the evolutionary family tree to do so—so do our cousins, the great apes. Specifically, a set of western lowland gorillas in the Republic of Congo. A recently releas...
Karim Benzema's Explanation For Role In Sex Tape Blackmail Plot Sounds Like Total Bullshit
When we last checked in on the most insane scandal going on in sports, the big news was that a transcript of a phone call between Real Madrid striker Karim Benzema and a good friend of his strongly suggested 1) that the good friend was trying to blackmail Lyon midfielder Mathieu Valbuena over a sex ...
Your Guide To The Craziest Sports Scandal You Aren't Paying Attention To
I get it. You see a headline like “Real Madrid Star Karim Benzema Charged In Sextape Blackmail Case” or “Transcript: Karim Benzema Helped Facilitate Blackmail Plot Against Teammate Over Sextape” and you aren’t quite moved. Sure, words like sex tape and blackmail seem juicy, but who is Karim Benzema ...
Transcript: Karim Benzema Helped Facilitate Blackmail Plot Against Teammate Over Sextape
Furthering the bizarre saga of Karim Benzema and the criminal charges he faces for his involvement in an alleged plot to blackmail his international teammate Mathieu Valbuena over a sextape, L’Équipe has now produced a full transcript of a phone call between the Real Madrid striker and the accused b...
Real Madrid Star Karim Benzema Charged In Sextape Blackmail Case
After being arrested and questioned by police in France yesterday morning for his possible involvement in a blackmail plot against fellow France international Mathieu Valbuena, Real Madrid’s Karim Benzema has been charged today for “complicity in an attempted extortion.”...
Russian Idiot On The Field Uses MacGyver Skills To Escape Security
The only thing more stereotypically Russian than the urge to sprint out onto the pitch in celebration of your team scoring is successfully fleeing back into the crowd before security apprehends you. Shouts out to the crowd for their teamwork. (Warning: video’s kinda loud.)...
Classic Man: "The Great Thing About VCRs"
Frequently in this space, we will consult a different entry in the 1987 book The Modern Man’s Guide to Life to see how the advice therein has aged. Last week, we discussed STDs; today, we’re talking home entertainment....
Lil Wayne Mixtapes, Ranked
For most of the 21st century, you could argue that Lil Wayne was the best rapper on the planet without sounding as insane as he usually did. A Cash Money Records foot soldier in his teens, the New Orleans native slowly morphed from an underground sensation into an unlikely pop superstar best known f...
Heroic Chicagoan Escapes Tyrant Tow Truck
We are all born into and struggle against the confines of a system that denies our individuality and seeks to limit us. Some struggle more effectively than others....
Mixtape Drake Is My Favorite Drake
There are so many different versions of Drake now: the Drake Who Loves Nicki, the Drake Who Still Holds A Candle For Rihanna, and the ever-present Drake Who Loves His Mom. Plus there's Internet-Savvy And Emoji-Tatted Drake, Sports-Fan Drake, Houston Drake, Toronto Drake, Album Drake, and Mixtape Dra...
Why You Should Still Care About Lil Wayne
Sorry 4 the Wait 2, Lil Wayne's mixtape-length apology for the fact that his new album, Tha Carter V, hasn't been released yet, isn't exactly a home run. It's remix-heavy and frankly, a little boring. But that doesn't mean you should stop caring about him....
Rap's Love Guru: Why Plies Is Smarter Than You Think
Plies's decade in the rap game—in which he navigated through his native Florida's underground, ascended briefly to mainstream fame via two Gold-selling albums, and has since returned to the Southern rap mixtape circuit—immediately calls to mind one word: "realness." There are the titles of his first...
<em>The Basement Tapes Complete</em> Gives You All The Bob Dylan You Can Stand
Chronology imposes narrative when all else fails. So thank the tape-crawlers who've assembled Bob Dylan and the Band's The Basement Tapes Complete, the 11th volume of The Bootleg Series, Dylan and Sony Music's shrewd posterity-burnishing enterprise, for putting the thing together in as close to prop...
Great Ape: <em>Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes</em>, Reviewed
Three years ago, expectations for Rise of the Planet of the Apes were understandably low. The director (Rupert Wyatt) wasn't well-known, a lot of people despised the film's star (James Franco) for his Renaissance Man routine, and we all remembered how terrible Tim Burton's 2001 Planet of the Apes...
The Grierson & Leitch Top 12 Movies Of The First Half Of 2014
As of today, we are halfway through 2014. Most of your "prestige" movies aren't out yet—only a third of our top 10s last year were from the first half of 2013 —but that doesn't mean this year's first six months didn't have its delights. Surprisingly, many of the standouts were bigger-budgeted studio...