art Page 262 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Pregnant Man Is Very Upset With Chaz Bono
Where to begin? Ok, the cast....
Kansas State's EcoKat Mascot Will Reduce Energy Usage And Humiliate The School
The Kansas State administration may need a refresher in the 2011 version of "braggin' rights." The school is taking on rival Kansas in something called the Take Charge! Challenge, which aims to increase recycling and conservation efforts at the two institutions....
Jeremy Shockey Saves Choking Teammate
Lots of words might come to mind when you think of Jeremy Shockey: thug, crybaby, and even choker. But lifesaver, trachea-clearer—those are new for Shockey....
Why Is Bill Belichick Stockpiling Mediocre Former Jets This Offseason?
The Patriots have a thing for acquiring former Jets to play small roles on their team. (The Jets sometimes do the same thing.) We wonder why....
Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Conquered By Optimism
How can hope be the enemy of human endeavor? That was the question facing Bartolo Colon Sunday afternoon, as the Yankees pitcher-philosopher took the mound against Zach Britton of the Baltimore Orioles—veteran against rookie, righty against lefty, metaphor for inexorable despair against metaphor for...
Not So Fast: Ron Artest Not Permitted To Change His Name Just Yet
"A court official said, 'Ron has to clear outstanding traffic warrants' before a name change can take effect. ... His next court date is set for Sept. 16." [Los Angeles Times, via SLAM Online]...
Ron Artest's Name Change Becomes Official Today
From now on, he really is going to be known as Metta World Peace. And he's changing his number. No, not that one. [Yahoo]...
Here's Video Of MLB.com's Fantasy 411 Guys Coming To Grips With The Earthquake
Thanks to the chaps over at BroBible for sending this footage of MLB Network's Jeremy Brisiel, Cory Schwartz, and Mike Siano at the moment their studio started shaking Tuesday afternoon. Say they, "The look of doom and gloom on Cory Schwartz's face is a thing of beauty." And they're right. It is....
Rival Soccer Players Know To Expect That Newcastle United's Joey Barton "Will Come In Your Face"
If your tongue absolutely, positively must slip during a sports interview, why not sound as if you're talking sexually when, in fact, you're talking about a rival's tenacity on the English Premier League pitch? This is what happened to Fulham's Philippe Senderos when asked about Newcastle United's...
Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: It's A Fine Line Between Failure And Non-Failure
What did Bartolo Colon teach us about our place in the universe last night? Special philosophical correspondent David Roher was at the ballpark to witness the veteran Yankee's performance against Oakland, as Colon fell behind the A's 5-0—with two of the runs scoring after he'd left the game, on a do...
The Ravens' Torrey Smith, In The Safest Place Imaginable, Ran For His Life When The Earthquake Hit
Smith, the Ravens' second-round draft pick out of Maryland, was doing a UM commercial when the earth moved. Owings Mills is 120 miles as the crow raven flies from the epicenter of the quake, so we're sure it was intense. We're also sure that a wide open football field is precisely the safest place...
US Marines Serving In Afghanistan Warned Not To Fart So Audibly
Battle Rattle, a Military Times blog, has an important dispatch from the front lines, which they wanted us to share with you. So often we forget about the sacrifices our troops abroad make to protect this nation's freedom. Sacrifices like sphincter clenching....
Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Judgment Without Pity
Bartolo Colon, Yankee pitcher and existential protagonist, found himself beset by 14 men last night. Nine of his antagonists were Kansas City Royals hitters-including Billy Butler, who launched a fly ball to somewhere around the top of the outfield fence in the third inning. Four more of his opponen...
<em>GQ</em>'s Michael Vick Story Will Just Make White People Angry Again
This one, penned by Yahoo! movie blogger Will Leitch, drops tomorrow at 7 a.m. so the mag has started to send out embargoed teases to other media outlets to get the buzziest buzz going on this thing but, shit, why wait 12 hours for the good stuff? You'll read it all tomorrow on GQ's website, right? ...
Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: The Annihilation Of The Self Into A Greater Cosmos
Veteran pitcher Bartolo Colon resumed his philosophical explorations yesterday afternoon, facing the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. Angels! Emissaries of the divine! But Colon met the Halos with yet another stolid performance: 6.0 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 3 K. One more no-decision, in one more eventual Yankees...
Total QB Rating: Everything Great About ESPN Multiplied By Everything Insufferable
It's been fascinating to watch ESPN roll out its new, proprietary Total Quarterback Rating over the past few days, and not just because we got to see Tirico, Gruden, and Jaws huffing and grunting and puzzling over the thing as if it were the first stone tool. ("This new measure of stats," Tirico cal...
Ron Artest Will Play In The Worst Basketball League In Europe
England could use a little peace right now, and they're getting Metta World Peace. Ron Artest, against the advice of his agent, his sponsors, and anyone who knows anything about basketball, has signed a deal to play for the Cheshire Jets of the British Basketball League....
Bartolo Colon-O-Meter: Boone Logan Ex Machina
New York Yankees starting pitcher Bartolo Colon threw himself-and all humanity-on the mercy of the universe Friday night, by daring to pitch against the Boston Red Sox. And the universe delivered a mixed verdict: 4.2 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 K, hooked for Boone Logan with the bases loaded in the fifth. The Y...
Ron Artest Put Away His Cellphone Last Night To Take In A Celine Dion Concert
Lakers forward/funnyman/dong-texter Ron "Metta World Peace" Artest has, with good reason, captured our imagination lately. Sometimes for good, sometimes for bad....
Manscaping And A Mankini Helped MMA Reach Its Aesthetic Nadir At UFC 133
No one watches UFC—what with its bloody noses, sweaty chests, cauliflower ears—for beauty's sake. No one would confuse Dana White with Donna Karan. But holy lord, things got ugly in one of the undercard fights last night....