art Page 298 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here At Deadspin, We Don't Just Inform, We Uplift
Because it's Daulerio's last column, and the level of discourse is about to elevated dramatically, we thought we'd toss a little scatty humor in your general direction....
Jessica Simpson Won't Be In Romo's Head, More Like Against It
It might seem a skosh ridiculous that Carolina Panthers fans are going balls out on this Jessica Simpson cutout distraction thingy tonight against Tony Romo and the Dallas Cowboys, considering that Terrell Owens has said repeatedly that Simpson really isn't a distraction to the team after all. So th...
A spy on the NBA on ESPN Christmas Day media conference call informs us that Stuart Scott is returning to the air tomorrow night but will undergo chemotherapy for colon cancer this winter. Expect a podcast on ESPN.com from Stu later today. We wish him well. (UPDATE: Scott does not have colon cancer:...
About Last Night
What you missed while battling the Rodents of Unusual Size ... • NFL: Vikings win 20-13, oust Bears from playoff hunt. Mini-Ditka still alive, however. • NBA: Suns beat Spurs, and to add insult to injury they do it while wearing those funky orange-and-gray uniforms. • NHL: Red Wings beat Capitals 4-...
Make Your Case To Attend The ESPN Holiday Party
Yesterday, we told you about the lack of hard alcohol at tonight's ESPN Holiday Party. Well, we can do you one better this morning: The official Web site for the party. It's a doozy....
It's The Festive Season In Bristol
We missed the official Gawker Media holiday party last week, which is probably for the best; it's all just a bunch of drunk 22-year-olds over there anymore anyway. And, unfortunately, we're not gonna be able to sneak into the ESPN party tomorrow night. Actually, it's not that unfortunate; it sounds ...
We Congratulate "Florida Quarterback" On His Heisman Trophy
One of the nice things about college athletes is that you don't have to pay them. Heck, it might be the best thing about college athletes. Seriously, look at them: They can put their bodies and lives on the line every week, and we don't have to give 'em nothin'. Amazing, right? And if they do really...
Canadian Football Has Strange Celebrations
Click to view I'm just going to sit back and let the video speak for itself. Sometimes a Saturday afternoon just isn't complete without a video of some schmuck getting hit in the balls with a football. Via College Humor...
Submit Your Body Shots to Bruno Fierce
Craigslist is an almost endless source of entertainment if you're coming down off of a coke bender, otherwise it's good for the occasional laugh. Sometimes it's even a great source of information for the hot young trollops of New York who are looking for a chance to have champagne spilled on them by...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as firefighters attempt to "Free Willy" ... • College football: NCAA Division I Championship Subdivision playoffs, semifinal, Richmond at Appalachian State. 'Nuff said. [ESPN2] • College women's soccer: NCAA Division I College Cup, semifinal, Notre Dame vs. Florida State, College Stati...
Time For More Fun And Games With ESPN Memos
After the infamous ESPN Memo from this summer, the folks at ESPN wised up and stopped widely distributing their interoffice "Town Meeting" emails. It appears, however, they have gotten lazy: We have another one....
Marty Brodeur Is Happy Again
We are proud to welcome famed hockey journalist James Mirtle to the post of NHL Closer writer this week....
A Wagon Fulla Channels? For The Champeenship?
• In Progress — MAC Championship: Central Michigan-Miami U. [ESPN2] • 12 noon — Army-Navy [CBS] • 12 noon — C-USA Championship: Central Florida-Tulsa [ESPN] • 12 noon — NCAA Basketball: Duke-Davidson [ESPNU] • 1 p.m. — ACC Championship: Boston College-Virginia Tech [ABC] • 1:30 p.m. — Movie: Jingle ...
Al Davis Is Not At All Insane
We thought you should know that Al Davis stated recently that he will not retire until the Oakland Raiders win two more Super Bowls. We're not saying that it may take a few years, but we did immediately think of this photo. "Al, if you want a two tight end set, beep twice. For a running play, beep o...
This Tattoo Should Cause No Problems Whatsoever
Know how I know your team is gay? It's, um, tattooed right on your arm there. Let this be a lesson to you kids: Beer, Aussie Rules football and Thai tattoo parlors generally don't mix. That's always been my motto, anyway....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch with your new invisible Spanish friend ... • College Football: Florida Gators at South Carolina Gamecocks. Gamecocks. Insert Beavis-like laugh here. [ESPN] • College Football: Come say goodbye to the Orange Bowl. [ESPN2] • Movie: Love & Basketball. Stevie and Cuttino are pumped! [ABC F...
Pedro's Offseason Workout Regimen
Far be it from us to tell a professional athlete how to live his/her life, but heavens, Pedro, you're turning into Schilling....