as Page 2447 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Clinton Portis. Clinton Portis. Say It With Us Now.
If it's Friday, it must be time to check in on the weird shit Clinton Portis came up with yesterday. We've documented Portis' antics extensively, and he did not disappoint yesterday with his new character: "Dollah Bill." This character's a little less inspired than "Dr. 'I Don't Know'" and "Sheri...

Theo Epstein Is STOKED, Dude!
We admire Theo Epstein as much as anyone — OK, maybe a little less — but secretly we've always kind of suspected that, for all the Yale and sabremetrics and what-not, he's pretty much just a big dumb likable Boston frat guy like pretty much everybody else our age we run into while out in Boston. (...

Chan Ho As You've Never Seen Him Before
One of the weirder Web sites we've seen in a while: The self-explanatory ChanHoParkInCompromisingPositions.com . It appears to be nothing but Chan Ho Park being stretched by a trainer, and their ongoing dialogue. And you know what? That's enough....

Two Great Tastes That Taste Great Together
Yep, that's right: Dennis Rodman was on "Quite Frankly With Stephen A. Smith" last night. This is like seeing L. Ron Hubbard and Tony Robbins in the same room together. Our mind is officially blown....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while waiting in line for the new Harry Potter movie ... • NBA: Horry's 3-pointer leads Spurs over Rockets. Now you may go on with your day. • College Basketball: Syracuse beats Texas Tech 81-46, Knight gnaws off own left hand at the wrist. • NHL: Martin St. Louis' surprise return le...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while making elaborate plans to beat the urinalysis ... • NBA: Kobe's 42 lead Jackson's Lakers over Brown's Knicks (yes, those are their official team names now). • NBA: Not to be outdone, Iverson scores 42 as 76ers win sixth straight. • NHL: Flames beat Red Wings for eighth straight...

Targeting Jittery Ballplayers
One of the most common emails we receive around here is a request to look further into the rampant use of amphetamines in Major League Baseball. We don't think this is because fans necessarily care, mind you. We just think fans think it's funny to imagine all the favorite players all jittery and j...

Stephen A. Smith, Today's Murrow
Yesterday we looked at Stephen A. Smith, expert columnist and sports reporter. We then came across a story in the Winston State-Salem News Argus, the student newspaper of the college Stephen A. attended....

How Not To Beat A Drug Test
Respectable journalist (and apparent blog reader) Jon Heyman of Newsday was the first person yesterday to break the news of baseball's new steroid agreement yesterday, so our eyebrows raised when we saw, in his column today, him point out a specific Web site one of his sources says is vital in hel...

About Last Night ...
You stayed up until the wee hours. But the dance, Maria, now she is over ... • Detroit Pistons win to go 7-0: All hail Flip Saunders, unchallenged coaching God. • NHL: Ducks trade Federov to Blue Jackets, sending the earth wobbling into a new orbit. • College Basketball: Temple's John Chaney gets 50...

Tommy Lasorda's World Still Quiet, Full Of Penne
The Los Angeles Dodgers are very close to hiring a new general manager, the team leaning toward current assistant GM Kim Ng or assistant San Francisco Giants GM Ned Colletti to succeed Paul DePodesta, according to the Los Angeles Times. Of course, in the latest post over on his blog at MLB Blogs....

Mark Cuban's Crush On Ayn Rand
In a new story as part of "college week" on Slate.com, various "famous people" talk about the books they read in college that made a huge difference in their lives. 40 Year Old Virgin writer and director Judd Apatow says A Death In The Family. Chris Matthews says A Thousand Days. Bill Simmons even...

New Steroid Agreement Reached
Well, we didn't have the scoop this time, but our main man Jon Heyman did: Major League Baseball and the players union have reached an agreement on a new steroid penalty policy. The details: 50 games for a first offense, 100 games for a second offense and a lifetime ban for the third offense. Thos...

Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Stephen A. Smith
We're not even going to get into his show on ESPN, which we've well-documented elsewhere. We are here to discuss the many sins of Stephen A. Smith the writer, the columnist. The man absolutely refuses to back up any of his written assertions with sources or facts. A guy who routinely sends in colu...

Leaks: Pujols Wins MVP, Finally
Well, today's the day they announced the National League MVP, and you can probably guess which way we're rooting. (We'll give you a hint; it's not the Cub. Or the guy from that Southern team that has no fans.) The vote is expected to be close, but, according to unfortunately named Cardinals blogge...

The Woe Of The Eagles Fan
There was a moment last night, during the Eagles' season-crushing 21-20 loss to the Cowboys, when you really grasped just how difficult it must be to be an Eagles fan. Ordinarily, we scoff when fans of successful teams complain about their suffering; we root for the Arizona freaking Cardinals, so ...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while taking your kids to the movies to see animated chickens ... • NFL: Cowboys rally to down Eagles in fourth quarter. We're gonna keep our distance from Eagles fans this morning, just to be safe. • Your eventual NCAA Basketball Tournament Pool bracket, Day One: Duke handles Boston...

Alex Rodriguez Wins Even MORE Fans!
MLB.com just announced that Yankees third baseman/lipstick model Alex Rodriguez has won the American League MVP award. We salute A-Rod on this "victory."...

Oskee-Wow-Wow
We are honored — since we've mentioned it only sparingly, though expect that to change as college hoops gets going — that so many of you have noted that we are proud graduates of the University of Illinois and have asked our opinion of the NCAA ruling that the Chief Illiniwek nickname and "symbol"...

About Last Night ...
What you missed while having a tea party in your tree fort with your mom ... • NFL: Manning, Colts stay undefeated after carving up Texans. • NBA: LeBron youngest ever to 4,000 points as Cavaliers beat Magic. • NASCAR: Kyle Busch wins Checker Auto Parts 500, brother watches on TV from jail....