ball Page 1602 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
UNC Freshmen Start The Summer Off Right By Drinking On A Party Boat
Pictured is UNC freshmore John Henson with two girls who are likely in his statistics study group. At least they appear to be having as much — if not more — fun as stuntman-to-be Tyler Hansbrough. [COED Magazine, via]...
Greatest Football Chants Of The Season REVEALED
Football fans love a good chant, and this season has heard plenty of them....
Shouldn’t All Priests Be Castrated?
It's Tuesday. Let's look in the funbag and see what's inside. Oooh! Big League Chew! Man, do I love Big League Chew. It's like tobacco, but for children! Do I chew the entire pack all at once? FUCK AND YES, I do. Oh, and there are some letters in here. Let's read them....
Wolpfack Typo Makes For Efic Pail
NC State issued their baseball media guide last week — then quickly took it down. Study it long enough, and you'll see why. Dyslexics of Raleigh...untie! [StateFansNation]...
Softball Conference Champs Just Want To Dance It Out (WINNER'S UPDATE)
Fresh off winning an Atlantic Sun conference championship, the Lipscomb Lady Bisons debuted a coordinated dance routine. Unfortunately, it brought them neither the replenishing rains that would ensure a bountiful harvest nor a Women's College World Series title....
Meet Tyler Lewis: The No-Look-Passing, Ankle-Breaking Teenager
Here's video of a high school sophomore who, since he's white, will be compared endlessly to Steve Nash. While not Nash-level yet, he has a lot going for him: great floor-vision, superior play-making skills, and not being Guerdwich Montimere. [Hoops Doctors, ONEentertainmentHOOPS.com]...
A Special Balls Deep Message To The Class Of 2010
It's graduation time across the country. I've done this post the past two years running, and I don't see new college grads getting any less annoying. So we'd best do it again....
Reliving High School Days More Rape-y Than Hollywood Makes It Seem
Remember Guerdwich Montimere, the 22-year-old man who posed as a 16-year-old to have another go-round at playing high school hoops? Turns out he slept with a 15-year-old girl while living the lie. Guess he was really committed to the part. [AP]...
The Condom Follies. GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Is The Best Buy Geek Squad Stealing Your Donkey Porn?
No time to waste. My hand hurts a lot from talking with my kid while using a cow puppet yesterday. I used the puppet for, like, an hour. Now I have carpal tunnel. Lamest injury ever? Lamest injury ever. Fucking cow puppet. Right to the letters:...
Eric Byrnes Was Released Into His Natural Habitat
Byrnes has slipped nicely into the cleanup spot for his beer league softball team, going 2-for-3 with two home runs in his second game last night. And unlike his last gig in Seattle, napping during games is encouraged. [PRO Rumors]...
Stanford Guard Dismissed From Team After Golf Cart DUI
Fifth-year senior JJ Hones was arrested last week for "driving under the influence, reckless driving, evading a police officer and resisting arrest." Not bad considering her vehicle runs on batteries and easily tips over on fairways. [Fanhouse]...
Sixteen-Year-Old High School Basketball Star Is Actually 22-Year-Old Liar
Jerry Joseph was simply living the American dream—lying about his age so that he could go back to high school and relive his glory days as the big man on campus. Didn't Bob Dylan sing about this?...
Washed-Up Coach Reduced To Shamelessly Peddling Crap On Twitter
Judging by his Twitter account, Florida Atlantic's Mike Jarvis is now a celebrity spokesman for something called the EnergyCare Dream Pillow, which apparently worked so well for Jarvis that he slept through an entire basketball season. [@coachmikejarvis]...
Lebron Undergoes Elbow Surgery
Sure, it's an Orioles minor league pitcher named Luis Lebron. But still, could you imagine? (Did you folks forget this little gem?) [Balt Sun]...
Dave Bliss, Terrible Human Being Of Note, Now Shaping The Minds Of Tomorrow
Congratulations to Dave Bliss, the former Baylor coach, who, despite having presided over one of college sports' ugliest episodes, and despite having enlisted his team in an effort to smear a player, Patrick Dennehy, who had just been murdered by a teammate......
Are Happy Facebook Assholes Really That Happy?
I grind my teeth at night. I've done it all my life, and it's so bad that the sharp ends of my cuspids have been sanded down flat. Which means I totally can't be a phony vampire anymore....
Dallas Braden's Perfecto: A Musical Retrospective
Dallas Braden became the world's most notable mound-owning, finger-mustache-tattoo enthusiast on Sunday when he threw the 19th perfect game in MLB history. To celebrate, here are all 27 outs set to a song Braden undoubtedly likes. [Tune-age via The Misfits]...
Dwight Howard Copies That One Thing That LeBron Copied
Dwight Howard, the clown prince of the NBA, imitated LeBron James' sorta-not-really-his chalk toss before Game 2 against the Hawks. Dwight should go for broke next time; do MJ's tongue waggle while coming out of an Eagle County courthouse. [The Hoops Doctors]...
A Lovely Short Film For A Warm Spring Day: "Wiffleball '79"
"AJ,I thought you might enjoy my short film "Wiffleball '79." I did. I really did. You will, too. [YouTube]...