ball Page 1603 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Today In Things Making You Fatter: Baseball
Shocking news out of the halls of SI today: all-you-can-eat deals at baseball games are extremely unhealthy, and teams might have some ethical obligation to stop such promotions. To the pull-quotes!...
Time To Talk Wife Swapping
I ate a steak last night with béarnaise sauce, and I'm now of the age where doing something like that has definitive and brutal consequences. Oh yes. I'm talking about meat sweats. You know the kind. You wake up at 4AM sweating beefy juices. Your heart feels like a fucking 90-ton weight. You feel li...
Jennie Finch Retiring From Leisure Activity
She's calling it quits at age 29, even though softball is designed for 50-year-olds. Oh no! Without Finch as a draw, how will we — well, continue not paying attention to professional softball? [AP]...
<em>Inception</em> Was Great, Now Please Stop Talking About It, Assholes
I went and saw Inception on Friday night. I like any movie that includes mid-air hand-to-hand combat and Marion Cotillard's cleavage. But it's clear this movie is about to supplant "Lost" for annoying fanboy overanalysis....
Now They're Tasing Fans At Minor League Baseball Games
Another cop tased another unruly sports fan on Saturday, this time at a Daytona-Fort Myers Class A game. Between this and the explosions, minor league baseball is starting to resemble Greek basketball far more than anyone should be comfortable with. [Busted Coverage]...
Incredibly Fun Video Of A Fireworks Mishap At A Minor League Baseball Game
Everyone loves a good minor league baseball fireworks show. Unfortunately, whether you've bused in a group of epileptics or not, these things just don't go according to plan....
A Straight Man's Gay Softball Odyssey
Dedicated as we are to covering the sport, we'd be remiss in not sending you to the story of one man who loves his gay softball team almost as much as he loves kissing ladies. [Good Men Project]...
Cockblocked by Nick Swisher! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase a few heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
SMU's Focus On Academics Is Destroying Its Football Program
Fans, boosters and even the coach are up in arms over the rejection of two recruits on academic grounds, even though they qualify for almost any other program in the country. It's the polar opposite of the classic debate, and it's fascinating....
How To Protect Yourself From Excessive Rimjobbing
No time to waste. We again go right to your letters:...
The Stadium Capacity Arms Race Is On
Michigan Stadium, opening after renovations, will again be the nation's largest with a capacity of 109,901. They've still got a ways to go to catch Pyongyang's Rŭngrado May Day Stadium, which seats 150,000. [Free Press]...
How To Perfect Your Imaginary Serial Killer Technique
Your letters:...
Last Night's Winner: People With Functioning Mute Buttons
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Home Run Derby viewers who mercifully put Chris Berman on mute and didn't hear him say "backbackback" all night. For you, we've made this little video....
Toddler Mows Down Referee With Golf Cart
With a 2-year-old child wedged on the pedal, the golf cart careened out of control across a high school football field, leaving bodies in its wake. Well, one body....
Pro Football Hall Of Fame Awards, Woooop, Slide Back, Back, Back Into Irrelevance
Awful, awful leatherhead Chris Berman is the recipient of this year's Pete Rozelle Radio-Television Award, an award that had been previously given to actual sportscasters like Pat Summerall for their "exceptional contributions" to TV pigskin. World, stop honoring this man....
Silent Farts Vs. Loud Farts — WHO YA GOT?!
I love to fart. I really do....
Florida Manages To Commit Recruiting Violations On Facebook
Today in "Snitches Get Stitches" news, a rival school—not necessarily an SEC rival—has tattled on two Florida coaches for improperly communicating with recruits over Facebook on separate occasions. The improper method: public wall postings. Wait, what?...
Timofey Mozgov Is Cocksucker
Today is day Timofey Mozgov becomes most unlikable person in Russian Basketball Super League, and perhaps all Russian sports. I think he is okay a year ago. No more. He is villain now....
Out-Of-Breath Broccoli-Costumed Man Proposes To Lady At Minor League Game
Joining the ranks of the other marriage proposal video we've posted comes this one from a recent Reading Phillies game, where a racing broccoli mascot won both the race and the heart of the fair maiden in the stands. [The 700 Level]...
A Wheelchair-Bound Fan Storms Field During CFL Game
Now this is how you disrupt a game. I assume this person is handicapped but the details on his great murderball ride to freedom are scarce. Provide them if you can, please. Thank God they didn't tase him. [YouTube via Orlando Kurtenblog]...