ball Page 1735 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Your NCAA Champion Kansas Jayhawks
You have to admire a national championship game in which most of the final possessions late in regulation are fast breaks. In a relentlessly entertaining national championship game, the Kansas Jayhawks win their first national championship in 20 years. Bill Self gets his title, and Mario Chalmers s...
A College National Championship Game That Actually Crowns A Champion
We're of the idea that Memphis is going to win tonight, which is why they're probably toast. Though if they win, you can make the case that they're a historic team, which is kind of crazy to contemplate....
For You Few Humans Still Paying Attention To Your NCAA Bracket
With the end of the NCAA Tournament tonight, that means not only that One Shining moment is upon us, but also that: Hey! Time to wrap up your tournament pools....
Milwaukee's Tailgaters Highly Evolved In All Things Toilet-Related
Where have you publicly evacuated when confronted with an overactive beer-filled bladder and nary a port-o-potty in site to relieve yourself during tailgating? Some duck behind cars and unleash right on the asphalt; others use their empty beer bottles as rudimentary urine containers....
The NCAA Tournament, Like Everything Else, Is Run By Larry Brown
Storming The Floor previews today's NCAA Championship Game between the Kansas Jayhawks and the Memphis Tigers....
Roy Williams Will Scribble Near Your Naughty Bits
Should Roy Williams be enjoying himself this much, considering how completely he screwed up your office pool brackets? Well, at least he's not trying to make money off of the back of the young lady, like someone we know....
Will Bill Self Be The Next To Forsake Kansas?
OK, Kansas fans, we give: After Saturday's first-half shellacking of North Carolina by Kansas, we can no longer deny you the proper admiration, even if your coach did break our Illini fan heart. Bill Self, just one week ago known as the guy who couldn't get past the Elite Eight, might be the most re...
Jake Peavy Doesn't Have Hand
Before we get to Sunday's action, here's what they're saying about the Jake Peavy spitball controversy from over the weekend ......
We've Secretly Switched Canseco's Coffee With Mind Control Serum, Let's See If He Notices
You've seen the excerpts. You've heard the stories. Now prepare for the book tour. Jose Canseco is gallivanting about America, pubbing his second book, "Vindicated," the gripping tale of one man trying to figure out how to use a word processor to burn every bridge he had in baseball. And he doesn't ...
Jake Peavy Packed Kenny Rogers' Hand Cream By Mistake
Earlier we told you of Jake Peavy's masterful one-run complete game win over the Los Angeles Dodgers. A reader sent in these "shots of the screen" indicting a smudginess of the index and middle fingers, and possibly the thumb....
That's A Working Microphone, Derrick Rose
Now one has to wonder what Rose was afraid his teammate was going to say about him. "What do we think of him? I mean, once you get past the premature ejaculating and toenail eating, he's a pretty nice kid who can make things happen on the court. It's a good thing too, we almost forgot his Cabbage Pa...
Shades Of A Very Expensive 2003
And there it is. The dreaded comparison: "Detroit is 0-5 for the first time since the Tigers dropped their first nine games in 2003 en route to an AL-record 119 losses." For the record, the 2008 Tigers are in no way similar to the 2003 variety, with the exception of players named Brandon Inge, Jerem...
Kansas, Memphis Sprint Past Everybody
Storming The Floor wraps up last night's non-live-blogged Final Four action....
I'm Your Beer Bong Man, Stop Me As I'm Passing By
Last year on Opening Day, the Milwaukee Brewers faithful unveiled the beer pong orgy. This year they've made it a more intimate occasion, ensuring that each and every Brewers fan gets adequately blasted. Bringing the love back into binge drinking, now that's what it's all about....
NCAA Takes Rigid Anti-Hot Girl Stance
Never have I eaten at a Hooters Restaurant, although I always found it amusing that in Toledo there was a Hooters across the street from a Catholic grade school. (Fun infallible fact: Growing up, Katie Holmes went to school there.) I guess when one hears the food isn't that great, and the only gimmi...
Bill James's Steroid Accusations Have Higher Range Factor Than Canseco's
By now even most casual baseball fans know the story of Bill James. Baseball thought of stats one way, he thought of them another, using complex equations using the quadratic formula and integrals and grep. Easy enough. But perhaps Mr. James has another e=mc² up his sleeve when it comes to the way w...
Blue Jays Fan Bares ... Nothing
What is it about that vast field of indoor turf that compels individuals to sashay onto it? Was it the powder blue throwbacks? That's the only excuse I'm taking on an otherwise standard Blue Jays opening night. Toronto beat the visiting Red Sox 6-3, thanks to Frank Thomas's go-ahead double. Roberto ...
NCAA Pants Party: Final Four
All right, well, the games finally tip back off tomorrow, and it's about time: Without any major storyline — The Chalk Bracket just doesn't tend to inspire people — it's been a bit of a slog this week....
Posing As An Unknown ESPN Analyst Not The Way To Score Teens
That man to your right is ESPN college basketball analyst Mark Adams. Some of you may recognize him; most of you may not. That still didn't stop a 48-year-old New Jersey man from posing as Mark Adams in a failed attempt to shack up with a teenage girl....