ball Page 1799 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
When An Old Athlete Is Put Out To Stud
Nothing in sports makes us feel older than when an athlete retires; often, we remember when they first came into the league, and realize that an entire career has passed while we slowly lurched closer to death. It's an uplifting feeling....
Restless And Bored In Seattle, But Well Fed
We're excited to be heading to Safeco Field this September, and not just because of the Mariners, U-Dub and Seahawks games; apparently, the Safeco Field stands are going the way of the house call....
Another Perfect Moment Spoiled By Assheads
Like many of you, our favorite moment from last year's college football season was the thrilling Fiesta Bowl, in which Boise State beat Oklahoma with the Statue of Liberty play and running back Ian Johnson proposed to his cheerleader girlfriend after scoring the winning points. It was one of those s...
Charlie Weis, Unsuccessful In Obese Litigation
Say what you will about Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis, but you can't say he isn't constantly charging forward. Whether it's recruiting, attacking a Cover 2 or, you know, gastric bypass surgery, the guy makes up his mind and just GOES FOR IT, MAN. Suck Off The Fat Like A Champion. Unfortunately, such...
Dice-K And The Red Sox: Part Of This Complete Breakfast
The resignation on Bud Selig's face, and the fact that he's packed his giant swimming trunks, must mean that he's given in and will follow Barry Bonds around for a month or so until Hank's record is broken. So with that crisis solved, we can turn our attention to happier things ... super, terrific f...
The End Of July Ain't What It Used To Be
As much as we might try, we can't muster up much enthusiasm for the trading deadline this year, which is in week. No matter scenarios they give us, we just don't believe anyone too huge will end up switching teams. The days of the Mark McGwire, Mike Piazza trades seem over. (Not that we ever conside...
Jeff Pearlman, On His Subject Barry Bonds
Barry Bonds remains just two homers away from Hank Aaron's record, and in the wake of this historic and confounding achievement, we felt we should talk to a guy who knows the life of Bonds better than anyone else in the media: Jeff Pearlman, Bonds' biographer in Love Me, Hate Me. We've interviewed...
Some Inspiring News For A Change, OK?
Forgive me for skipping the lovefest that is Bonds vs. Aaron today (no homers, Giants lose to Braves if you must know). All things being equal, I would have much rather attended Boston's 6-2 win over the Indians at Jacobs Field, because Jon Lester started for the Sox, went six innings and earned the...
Selig Won't Watch, But We'll Have To
Well, if that whole Barry Bonds Won't Play On ESPN thing turns out to be based in reality, we're all in luck; Bonds is never going to break Hank Aaron's record. Because everyone of his at-bats is gonna be on The Worldwide Leader until, well, until he breaks it, or dies. So, you know, enjoy....
Help This Guy Write His Gay Yankees Book
About a decade ago, a Yankees clubhouse attendant filed a lawsuit against the team claiming he was fired because he was gay, and that he was taunted by players calling him "faggot." (The team says he was fired for theft.") Well, he's now writing a book....
Shelley Duncan Needs A Nickname
It happens all too often in sports; a youngster bursts onto the scene with a noteworthy accomplishment so quickly that even our best broadcasters and journalists have not had time to supply him with a ridiculous, hackneyed nickname, or overreaching home run call. From the New York Daily News:...
Remembering Harry Caray's Last Broadcast
The intrepid souls at Joe Sports Fan have dug up tape of the final game Harry Caray every broadcast. The game was September 21, 1997. So much has changed, but Harry was always the same....
Hope Can Be Found In The Heart Of Miguel Batista
Kids, if you're having trouble in your current relationship, if you and your significant other are finding it difficult to communicate with each other, if you're feeling the spark slowly drain away ... well, only two people can save you. David Copperfield, and Miguel Batista....
No Bonds For You!
As you may have noticed, Barry Bonds is being held out of the final game of San Francisco's series at Milwaukee (in progress). So it looks like he won't be making any progress towards Henry Aaron's prized record on my watch. Oh well, I'll just have to keep staring at my Arizona State throwback jerse...
Tim "Douche" Donaghy Did It and I Called It
The now ex-NBA referee has had a really shitty week, and deservedly so. Just as I predicted Donaghy was identified as the target of the FBI's gambling investigation. While part of me feels for a guy who obviously suffers from a gambling addiction the rest of me is fucking ecstatic. The reason I kept...
My VORP Is Phenomenal
Everything was clicking in Boston last night and Terry Francona's jaw was no exception. The Red Sox pounded Chicago 10-3 despite a botched (non) homerun call by the umpires leading to Francona's righteous ejection. The Red Sox were led by another dominant performance by Josh Beckett. He struck out t...
Bonds Might Do This This Weekend
After his two home runs yesterday, everybody's favorite beacon of light Barry Bonds is just two home runs away from tying Hank Aaron. Perhaps you've heard about this. He's got three games in Bud Selig's hometown of Milwaukee to go for it this weekend, and then comes home for a week. It's possible he...
The Kansas City T-Bones, The Universe, And Everything
Time once again to check in with the world of minor league baseball; it's Rick Chandler's Minor Enterprise!...
That Sound You Hear Is Cardinals Fans Tightening The Noose
This photo, shot in the wake of the Cardinals' announcement that Chris Carpenter will have Tommy John surgery, reveals just how matters are going in St. Louis right now. 2006 World Series ... 2006 World Series ... 2006 World Series ... we must remember while we still can. We miss Jeff Weaver alread...
No Time For Pitchers
If this is a preview of the NLCS (sorry, Central Division! A fruit basket is on its way), we don't plan to miss a single game. Tom Glavine (he's still stuck at 299 career wins) and Derek Lowe both stunk, which is always fun, because the Mets and Dodgers combined for 35 hits in a 13-9 win by New York...