ball Page 1932 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Harris Interactive Poll Already On Its Death Bed
The Chicago Sun-Times noticed something that we found rather peculiar in college football's new "Harris Poll," designed to replace the Associated Press poll in the so-hated-by-everyone-you-almost-want-it-to-survive BCS standings: The 2-2 Illinois Fighting Illini, a team that lost 61-14 and gave up...

Roger Clemens And His Funny Shirts
More Webshot findings from the ladies of On The DL, and though none are quite as damning as the married Brandon Arroyo housing poor college students on his lap, there's still some pretty fun stuff. Not least of which are creative shirt designs from Phillies outfielder Pat Burrell (whom this blind ...

Fighting The Real Enemy: Fuchsia
From the Professors With Way Too Much Time On Their Hands Department: A professor at the University of Iowa has been receiving Internet threats after she claimed that the Iowa football team's propensity to color the locker room pink was sexist and homophobic. First off, we'd like to tell everyone ...

Football Outsiders Join The Happy Family Of Fox
Some Web business news this morning: The crazy kids at Football Outsiders have signed a deal with Fox Sports to provide NFL content for their site. Editor-in-chief Aaron Schatz — who previously had been doing work for ESPN Page 2 — says Fox Sports will run original FO content Monday-Wednesday. Fox...

Nobody Puts The Admiral In A Corner!
Everybody loves David Robinson. He's a military man, a two-time NBA champion and the type of guy who seems to clearly mean well for his fellow man (and DARE Lion). But that's no matter in the world of copyright infringement; the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim — a team name with so many words that j...

Bob Knight's Kid Keeps Falling Upward
According to the Lubbock Avalanche-Journal — which has to be the strangest name for a newspaper we've ever seen — Texas Tech assistant basketball coach Pat Knight will succeed his father (his dad goes by "Bob") as the Red Raiders' head coach. We are wary of calling this eventual promotion "nepotis...

Derek Jeter ... REVEALED! (Uh, by CBS.)
After its rather incomprehensible look at Miami Dolphins hemp advocate Ricky Williams last week, "60 Minutes" continues to scrape the filthy underbelly of the sports world with a cutting look at Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter. You won't believe the dirt they've uncovered. It's Derek Jeter LIKE YOU'...

The Lactating Rafael Palmeiro
Well, now it appears that the "secret source" for Rafael Palmeiro's steroid wasn't a "source" or, for that matter, a "steroid." (But Palmeiro's name was, in fact, spelled correctly.) It turns out that Palmeiro told Congress that Orioles shortstop Miguel Tejada gave Palmeiro a B-12 Vitamin, which i...

Do Not Spam Ozzie Guillen
In case you missed it from Sports Illustrated earlier this year — or its reprinting in the Chicago Daily Southtown — Chicago White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen has a publicly available email account: OzzieGuillen13@ hotmail.com. Now that the White Sox are in danger of a historic collapse, he says he'...

Rickey's Gonna Do What Rickey's Gonna Do
Great, great, great news: Rickey Henderson could finally make it back to the majors. It might not necessarily be in the way we'd prefer — we'd like to see Rickey a top some sort of wild animal, an elephant or giraffe maybe, as the United Nations holds a special session up in a skybox in his honor;...

Raffy's Mystery Roiding Buddy
Having exhausted the bottomless well of information that is Jorge Piedra, Congress is now investigating whether a teammate might have provided Orioles mustachio Rafael Palmeiro with steroids. Supposedly, Palmeiro said in closed-door testimony that he was given the substance by a fellow Oriole "by ...

Ladies Help Manny Be Manny
More great Webshots searching by On the DL today: The above picture is of Red Sox dingbat Manny Ramirez partying it up with a bunch of ladies he met at a bar earlier that night. (He appears to be teaching them how to "dance.")...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. NFL with Michael Smith: Wait, my bad, I thought you were Michael David Smith, from Football Outsiders. You know, the interesting one. You must get that a lot. • Noon. NCAA FB with Joe Schad: Covering the Dolphins for the Orland...

Just A Bunch Of Nerds, Debating Nerdom
We're big fans of Fire Joe Morgan's weekly deconstructions of ESPN analyst Joe Morgan's chats on ESPN.com — even if the chats of late, in the words of Fire Joe Morgan itself, have had "entirely un-Morgan-like reason and coherence" — and, to have some fun themselves, the folks at St. Louis Cardinals ...

Could Bonds Be The New Karl Rove?
We'd never thought about this before — mainly because politics scares and confuses us — but in a weird way, this kind of makes perfect sense: Barry Bonds is the Karl Rove of sports. Think about it. Bonds sticks to his guns no matter how ridiculous his position; he says he's going to do something, ...

And So It Begins ...
Prepare for the gnashing of teeth and rending of garments: The Yankees have passed the Red Sox in the American League East. With only 11 games left to go — and an ominous three-game set at Fenway to end the season — we have yet another chapter of Yankees-Red Sox drama. Please do not accuse of East...

We're Assuming Lou Pinella Stayed Home
What happens when you put actor Charlie Sheen, professional assbag Rob Dibble and a plethora of porn stars in a room together? Oh, did we mention the year was 1990? You can probably guess: It's a Big Red Orgy! According to Dibble in FHM magazine, notorious baseball fan Sheen "entertained" that Red...

A-Rod Takes His Swings
So far, we've revealed that Cubs 2B Todd Walker is a strip club hound and that Braves closer Kyle Farnsworth likes him some booze. For the final of the three On the DL items revealed this week, we unveil the biggest name yet. First, the item:...

Showing Love For Texas Tech (And Yourself)
Great, great link from The Mighty MJD this morning: At Texas Tech, whenever the Red Raiders do something great during a football game, a certain student fan is supposed to ring a bell on the sideline like a madman. We're not sure why ringing a bell gets fans excited, but we don't understand lots o...

Ryan Church, Theologian
Because we love baseball so much, we sometimes forget that the average athlete often lacks some basic education on fundamental issues. Take Ryan Church, Washington Nationals outfielder. As reported by The Washington Post — that is to say, he told this to a reporter — Church went to his team's chap...