baltimore-orioles Page 4 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

What The Fuck Are The Orioles Even Trying To Do Here?

The Orioles are putting MLB on notice with a new standard of uselessness never before seen at this level of the sport. The latest example came on Thursday against Cleveland when they put together one of the worst plays in baseball history. Everything about it was wrong in a way I’ve never seen base...

Jackie Bradley Jr.'s Latest Insane Feat Is Robbing A Walk-Off Dong

Wednesday’s Red Sox-Orioles game was much more eventful than you might expect from a game featuring a Red Sox team climbing back from a rotten start and, well, the Orioles, who are trash. Chris Sale took a no-hitter into the sixth inning; later, after losing the no-no, Sale took out his frustration ...

Orioles Fan Experiences Embarrassment, Elation, Denial, And Resignation After Interfering With Live Ball

In the bottom of the first inning of Monday’s Red Sox-Orioles game, Jonathan Villar lifted a long fly ball to left field, where J.D. Martinez tracked it to the wall. The wall seemed to sneak up on Martinez a little bit, and he was unable to make the catch, with the ball dropping and Villar racing to...

Here Is A Horrifying Orioles Statistic That Somehow Has Nothing To Do With Chris Davis [CORRECTED]

Baseball fans are going to be treated to some gruesome numbers this season, courtesy of the bottom five or so teams in baseball, mired in that group of organizations that have no intention of being good in 2019. But the Orioles, man, those poor suckers are rowing out to heretofore unknown new horizo...

Holy Shit, Chris Davis Actually Got A Hit

A historic weight was lifted off of Chris Davis’s shoulders on Saturday. After 54 consecutive at bats without a hit—a streak that started in September of last season—Davis did the unthinkable and finally smacked one into the outfield for a single. The unfortunate soul who helped Davis break the stre...

Chris Davis Is Now Officially Part Of Miserable Baseball History [Update]

Chris Davis has done it, it being a thing he definitely didn’t want to do. The Baltimore Orioles’ slugger—uh, hitter—uh, statue—lined out to left in the bottom of the fifth in tonight’s game against the Oakland Athletics. In doing so, he reached an 0-for-47 mark which began Sept. 14 of last season, ...

Chris Davis Is Closing In On Some Miserable History

How bad are things for Orioles first baseman/futilityman Chris Davis? He’s so lost at the plate right now, he’s losing pitching assignments over it. ...

Chris Davis Is Really Bumming Me Out

In what threatens to become an Orioles home-opener tradition, Chris Davis went 0-for-3 with three strikeouts and was increasingly booed for each....

This Is The Face Of A Man Getting Pulled In The Seventh Inning Of A No-Hitter

It didn’t take too long for the Baltimore Orioles, who came into this season with one of the most clown-ass rosters ever assembled in the history of clown-ass rosters, to do away with whatever good will might have been earned by taking two of three from the Yankees to open the season. They did so by...

Dear God

The Baltimore Orioles Have Been Even Worse Than They Look

In 2005, the Baltimore Orioles shocked the world with a 42-28 start, good enough to keep them in first place in the AL East into mid-summer. This was before Rafael Palmeiro, fresh off his 3000th hit, lied to Congress and tested positive for steroids; before ostensible ace Sidney Ponson was arrested ...

Orioles Rookie's First Career Base Hit Turns Into Ridiculous Clown Show<em></em>

The Orioles and Blue Jays are currently playing a series that has no significance whatsoever to the greater baseball universe. The only reason to have these games is so such-and-such youngster can get his first taste of life in the majors. In this case the youngster is Orioles rookie outfielder DJ S...

Orioles Catcher Caleb Joseph Wants All His Teammates To Think About How Badly They Suck

The​ Orioles​ have won 43 games this season. They’ve lost 107. They are tied with the 1988 team for most losses in franchise history. Given all this, it’d be bigger news if players weren’t talking about how much the team sucks, but catcher Caleb Joseph, who’s been with the organization since he was ...

Was This Raccoon Witch Cursing The Baltimore Orioles? An Investigation

The Baltimore Orioles came into Wednesday night a horrendous 52.5 games out of first place in the AL East, and an equally shocking and horrifying 40.5 games back of the AL Wild Card. All of that sucking and losing happened before 8:33 p.m. Eastern Standard Time, when it was announced that this devi...

Whatever Caleb Joseph Was Doing On This Home-Plate Play, It Didn't Work<em></em>

With two outs in the top of the fifth in today’s game between the last-place Orioles and the Yankees, Baltimore catcher Caleb Joseph tried to score from first base on a double, but he was out by a mile. As Yankees catcher Austin Romine squared up in front of the plate to make the tag, Joseph went to...

Adam Jones Wouldn't Let The Orioles Trade Him, Is Awesome

It’s no secret that the Baltimore Orioles are, uh, resetting. Over the past month they’ve had the big Manny Machado deal, and yesterday the team traded three more veterans: Jonathan Schoop, Darren O’Day, and Kevin Gausman. It might have been four, but Adam Jones, the longtime face of the club, decid...

Outfielder Carlos Gomez Takes Mound, Pitches Exactly Like Non-Pitcher

The position-player-as-pitcher trend continues piling up numbers at a record pace. Three more position players took the mound Friday night; the total across MLB is now up to 45, by far the most ever for a full season, and it’s still July. One of the recent unfortunate fellows was Rays outfielder Ca...

The Dodgers Have Won The Manny Machado Sweepstakes, Finally

Manny Machado is heading west. USA Today’s Bob Nightengale reported yesterday that the Baltimore Orioles had the framework of a deal in place to trade Machado to the Dodgers for a bushel of prospects, and the trade finally went through today after a “brief medical blip” caused both parties to stay a...

There's A New Co-Leader In The Manny Machado Sweepstakes

Manny Machado homered in his first-at bat, his 24th of the year, and then left the game after the fourth inning, because of wet grass following a rain delay. Baltimore manager Buck Showalter said, without outright saying, what we all know: that Machado is currently more valuable to the Orioles on th...

Manny Machado Is Smashing Dongs Against The Yankees While He Still Has The Chance

Orioles shortstop Manny Machado is very likely going to be out of Baltimore by the end of the month, and if you believe the whispers, the Yankees are one of the teams that badly want to trade for him. For now, though, as the Yanks battle the Orioles at Camden, Machado remains an enemy of all that is...