bayern-munich Page 1 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cupcakes aren't just reserved for American football
We see it in American sports every year. Usually in the first few college football games of the season, powerhouses take on an FCS team to inspire confidence and have the entire roster see the field and get in-game experience. Oddly enough, that matchup for Alabama takes place as the penultimate gam...
Life ain’t easy for Bayern Munich… according to Bayern Munich
Wherever he is, George Steinbrenner must’ve smiled and nodded at the news of Bayern Munich firing their manager with three-quarters of the season gone. Not only would that have reminded Big Steinn of his “glory” days (obviously the Yankees didn’t regain their spot atop the baseball world until Stein...
Is there actually hope in the Bundesliga? Well no, but it’s fun to pretend
On the opening day of the Bundesliga season, when Bayern Munich were getting in up to the elbow on Eintracht Frankfurt, just the defending Europa League champions, the joke on Twitter was that the league title was already decided. It was only half in jest. Munich have piled up the last 10 league tit...
der Fußballbundesliga?
The partnership between the NFL and the German Bundesliga, the top tier of the country’s professional soccer scene, is an interesting pair on its own. They both dominate their domestic markets. Dirk Nowitzki and Leon Draisaitl have come from Deutschland to dominate in North America. Steve Cherundolo...
For one day, Yann Sommer channeled the spirit of Ron Tugnutt (wait Ron Tugnutt isn’t dead, right?)
Most soccer analysts, especially those who really get in up to the elbow in the analytics, say that the sport is pretty random. Most games are only decided by a single moment (or rarely more than a handful), and those moments can bounce any which way no matter what the trends of a match or a season ...
Can the Bundesliga ever be competitive again?
I start a lot of these with the phrase, “I knew better.” Whether it’s tuning into Monday Night Raw, or believing in the Carolina Hurricanes, or something else, you say that phrase enough and it becomes clear that, no, I don’t actually know better. I’m just a gullible giblet. ...
Another barrier broken as Jesse Marsch looks set to replace Julian Nagelsmann
It’s Red Bull/Bundesliga manager tilt-a-whirl! Watch it spin! Where it stops...well, we actually have some idea. And where it stops provides yet another landmark for Americans in European soccer, this time the first Yank to manage in the Bundesliga. ...
Bayern Munich did that thing again
It was at the same point last season, though not in the calendar thanks to the pandemic, that this happened. Less than 10 games left in the season, Bayern Munich facing an away date against their closest rival and looking … well, vulnerable is too strong a word. Less godly, let’s say. The chasing te...
Robert Lewandowski Is The Best Striker In The World, ’Bout Time He Won a Ballon D’or
As Bayern Munich’s uncompromising, methodical, and callous march to their 8th consecutive Bundesliga title continued yesterday with a 4-2 win over Bayer Leverkusen. It was highlighted by their geriatric duo. Thirty-year-old Thomas Muller broke the Bundesliga record for assists with his 20th (this se...
Bayern Munich Are Inevitable, Time Marches On, Bells Toll, The Whole Thing
While the return of the Bundesliga has provided something to watch and discuss (and something of a roadmap for how other leagues could get back on the field), what it couldn’t promise was actual drama, especially in its title race. This afternoon, as is their way, Bayern Munich eliminated any chance...
Suspected Olympiakos Fans Invade Stadium, Leave Four Bayern Munich Fans Bloody During U-19 Match
Before Bayern Munich and Olympiakos faced off in the Champions League on Tuesday, mayhem broke out during a match between the clubs’ respective U-19 sides in Athens. In the 84th minute of the UEFA Youth League match between the sides, a stadium invasion left four Bayern fans bloody and injured....
Germany Rose And Fell With Bastian Schweinsteiger
Bastian Schweinsteiger was three different players. The German superstar, who announced his retirement from soccer on Tuesday, is leaving behind one of the most peculiar careers in recent soccer memory. From a wide player breaking into Germany’s 2006 World Cup side, to one of the best and most idios...
Philippe Coutinho Never Made Sense At Barcelona, And Now He's Gone
Turns out, there was no happy ending, only a long, sad breakup. ...
Bayern Munich Had No Answer For Jadon Sancho
Super Cup matches are usually glorified friendlies—unless your team wins, then they’re vastly important—but they can still tell us something about the upcoming soccer season. This is doubly true when two bitter rivals battle over a trophy no one cares about, and so I’m prepared to declare Jadon Sanc...
Moroccan Soccer Player Tries To Quit In The Middle Of A Preseason Ass-Kicking
Turkish side Fenerbahce took on German giants Bayern Munich in a preseason friendly yesterday. Things did not go well for the Fenerbahce players, who were dominated throughout the game and lost 6-1. That performance earned them plenty of boos from the home fans, which were enough to drive team capta...
Borussia Dortmund Are Coming For Bayern Munich's Crown
While no one bottled the Premier League this season, it can be said that Borussia Dortmund blew it in their pursuit of the Bundesliga title. Dortmund had a nine-point lead over arch rivals Bayern Munich in late January, only to let it slip through their fingers. Rather than sit and stew about their ...
Liverpool Will Go As Far As Sadio Mané Takes Them<em></em>
Faced with a most unenviable task—walking into Bayern Munich’s home stadium and needing to come away with a win or, at the very least, a scoring draw—Liverpool turned to their streaky African forward, who drove them to a commanding 3-1 victory and into the quarterfinals of the Champions League. No, ...
Two Good Bayern Munich Fans Thwart A Dickhead's Attempted Jersey Thievery
A little Bayern Munich fan’s dream was almost dashed this weekend when defender Joshua Kimmich came over to toss the kid his jersey, only for a rude man to reach out and snag it. Thanks to the help of Kimmich and two other justice-minded fans nearby, though, the culprit was immediately shown the err...
Franck Ribéry Defends Right To Eat Salt Bae's Garbage, Tells His Haters' Grandmothers And Mothers To Get Fucked
No sane person would flush gold down a toilet, nor would one consume gold-encrusted meat, but Bayern Munich forward Franck Ribéry essentially did both when he filmed himself at a Dubai restaurant preparing to put a steak flecked with the precious metal into what he later demonstrated to be his potty...
Thomas Müller Sent Off For Karate-Kicking Opponent Upside The Head Like A True Maniac
Bayern Munich will advance into the Champions League knockout rounds atop their group after a wild draw with Ajax today that saw two red cards within eight minutes of each other and four goals after the 82nd minute. Bayern had to score their equalizing and go-ahead goals without Thomas Müller on the...