Bayern Munich Page 2 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Report: Not Even FIFA Wants To Back This Stupid European Super League
Arguably the most corrupt sporting body in the world announced on Wednesday that it would actively work against the potential creation of a breakaway European Super League. The announcement was in response to a report from Der Spiegel that showed clubs like Bayern Munich and Real Madrid were alleged...
I Can't Stop Watching This Gorgeous Long Ball
Ajax midfielder Hakim Ziyech’s soaring cross-field pass in yesterday’s match against Bayern Munich was always beautiful, but watching it from this particular camera angle on loop sends it from “wow, that was cool” to “it’s been 30 minutes since I hit play on this video and I still haven’t moved”:...
Canada Has Its Own Wonderteen And Bayern Munich Just Paid $13 Million For Him
Bayern Munich have completed a deal today with the Vancouver Whitecaps for the MLS team’s 17-year-old winger, Alphonso Davies, effective at the January transfer window after he turns 18. The German giants will pay $13 million for Davies up front, with various bonuses kicking in if the young Canadian...
Bayern Munich President Brutally And Inexplicably Owns Mesut Özil
Germany and Arsenal midfielder Mesut Ozil announced his retirement from international soccer on Sunday, citing racism from fans, criticism of a photo he took with Turkish president Recep Tayyip Erdoğan, and unfair scapegoating by German’s top soccer officials. For no obvious reason, Bayern Munich pr...
Blame Bayern Munich, And All The Rest Of Them
If, after watching Bayern Munich’s appalling display of simultaneous superiority and ineptitude that granted the evil white empire of Real Madrid entry to the Champions League final, you found it a little difficult to maintain the furious, righteous anger in your belly once you saw the agonizing, te...
Historically Horrendous Boner By Bayern Munich's Keeper Gifts Real Madrid A Goal
If ever there were any doubt that Real Madrid are the luckiest team in the history of the world, this staggering gaffe by Bayern Munich’s Sven Ulreich that set up Karim Benzema for the easiest goal he’ll ever score in his life should remove all doubt:...
Soulless Avatars Of Late Capitalism Set Up Nicely To Acquire Another European Cup
European Soccer Market (ESM) analysts the world over are still abuzz about the big step Real Madrid (ESM:RMD) took on their path to consolidating their ownership of the European Cup for the third consecutive year....
UEFA Rudely Fines Besiktas For Delightful Cat On Pitch
Yesterday’s Champions League match between Bayern Munich and Besiktas experienced a brief interruption in the second half, courtesy of a friendly little kitty-cat scampering onto the pitch:...
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Neymar Ignores Edinson Cavani During Goal Celebration, But I'm Sure It's Totally Fine
PSG beat Bayern Munich by a score of 3-0 in the Champions League today. Edinson Cavani scored his team’s second goal after being set up nicely by Kylian Mbappé. Here is video of that goal, which you should watch for the goal’s coolness and for Cavani’s demonstrated happiness after he scores, but you...
Bayern Munich's Awful Backup Keeper Is Demonstrating How Great Manuel Neuer Is
If walking the Bundesliga, winning the World Cup, and consolidating his place as the world’s very best goalkeeper weren’t enough to win Manuel Neuer the Ballon d’Or in 2014, when he finished third in the voting, then maybe atrocious blunders like this one today by Sven Ulreich, Bayern’s No. 2 keeper...
James Rodriguez Escapes Real Madrid's Bench For Bayern Munich
At the 2014 World Cup, James Rodriguez appeared to cement himself as the next international superstar. Scoring six goals in five matches, including one of the best of the year, James won the Golden Boot and immediately caught the attention of Real Madrid. The La Liga giants bought him from Monaco fo...
Dortmund's Other Teenage Star Slams The Door On Bayern Munich To Reach German Cup Final
With Bayern Munich and Borussia Dortmund tied 2-2 late in their German Cup semifinal match, Dortmund’s teenage star (no, not that one) blasted the game-winning goal from behind a screen of defenders. Ousmane Dembele’s late winner sent his club to their fourth consecutive German Cup final, leaving Ge...
Referee Blunders Spur On Real Madrid's Murdalization Of Bayern Munich
Real Madrid scored three goals in about 10 rampaging minutes of extra time against 10-man Bayern Munich in the Champions League quarterfinals to win 4-2, and advance to the semifinals, 6-3 on aggregate. And while Bayern blew it and Real made the plays they needed to win it, it’s hard not to come awa...
Sergio Ramos Orchestrates Nearly Perfect Set Piece With Just A Few Nods Of His Head<em></em>
We’ve previously extolled the virtues of Real Madrid’s header-scoring genius, Sergio Ramos, and our appreciation for this set piece savant has only grown after seeing the following video. Watching Ramos’s mind work in realtime—as he interprets the situation, visualizes the best outcome, then effectu...
Cristiano Ronaldo Is Old And Slow And Still The Best
Because of the enduring nature of athletic greatness, it’s often difficult to notice in real time the inevitable fall as the best players slip from amazing to very good to eventually old and bad. The greatest players are great for so long, then begin to peter off so subtlety before the inexorable ef...
Arsenal's Champions League Comeback Fantasy Ruined By Penalty And Red Card
Welp, it was fun while it lasted. Despite putting together a lively first-half display, the last vestiges of what little hope Arsenal had of beating Bayern Munich by a huge margin died in this sequence of events early in the second half:...
Alexis Sánchez Does Two Bad Things, Saves Self By Doing Good Thing
Arsenal’s Alexis Sánchez had a chance to level up the game against Bayern Munich with a penalty. He took a bad one, and it was saved. Oops! Thankfully, the ball bounced kindly into his path for an easy rebound. Only he botched that with a whiffed shot. Oops again! The soccer gods smiled on Alexis, t...
Arjen Robben Teaches Arsenal Why You Can't Let Him Cut In On His Left Foot
Yes, everyone knows it’s coming. And everyone also knows that the whole point is that even though everyone knows it’s coming, it’s still impossible to stop. And yet it remains hard to watch a team allow Arjen Robben to get onto his left foot and do what he always does, as he’s just done to Arsenal:...
Bayern Munich Player Passes Ball To Advertisement
Things move fast in the wild world of sport. Sometimes you just react to a flash of color. Bayern Munich’s Thiago Alcántara saw a man in red streaking down the pitch, thought to himself “I’m wearing red,” and passed him the ball....