bo Page 980 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
We Say Replace Theismann With Borat Right Now
The Borat movie — Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan — is almost here, which pleases us greatly. We're kind of confounded by the release schedule, though. There was a premiere in Los Angeles on Monday (Defamer, of course, was there), and there was o...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while out enlisting the aid of Mad Max for your village ... • World Series: Carpenter Rules ... Cardinals take 2-1 series lead after 5-0 win over Tigers. • NHL: Penguin Lust ... Malkin leads Pittsburgh over New Jersey 4-2. • Tennis: We hate to be the ones to tell you that top-seeded ...
That'll Be All, Bill
You know, it's funny: The Dallas Cowboys' season appears to be disintegrating, and even though Terrell Owens had to go so far as to try to kill himself to derail the team, he seems to be the least of their problems....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while planning your Halloween costume ... • NFL: ... Tony Romo, not a restaurant chain, charges off bench, leads Cowboys to 36-22 loss to Giants. • NHL: Fools! You can't stop the Buffalo Sabres! • Look, Russian tennis! Jarkko Nieminen downs Janko Tipsarevic in the first round of St. ...
Swiftboat Veterans For Truth In Girls High School Basketball
Welcome to Castro Valley, Calif., home of former MLB All-Star Ed Sprague, Jacksonville Jaguars head coach Jack Del Rio and Lord of the Rings special effects supervisor Randy Cook. If planning to visit, please be advised that many of the adults there are several different kinds of crazy....
Does This Mean The Curse Is Back On?
It's our sad duty to report that Nelson de la Rosa, who was known as the world's smallest actor and who was a friend of pitcher Pedro Martinez, has died at the age of 38, of unknown causes. De la rosa had just arrived in the U.S. from Chile to visit relatives. The 2-foot-4 de la Rosa had become kn...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while licking the highway ... • World Series: It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood ... Mr. Rogers destroys everything in his path, including Pujols and Mr. McFeely. • NFL: The Power of (Fourth and) One ... Bengals somehow beat Panthers 17-14. • NHL: Ducks 3, Kings 2 in shootout. ...
About Last Night...
• World Series: Cardinals 7, Tigers 2. Ronnie Belliard's hair 1, Everyone Else's Hair 0. • College Football: Clemson 31, Georgia Tech 7. Clemson unleases their potent offensive attack on Georgia Tech, as well as a vicious attack on the eyeballs and fashion sense of everyone watching. • NHL. Sabres 6...
Corey Sanders Does Not Fight Any Better Than He Looks
I tried to look around for a more colorful recap of last night's Mike Tyson "fight," but honestly, there was enough in the Associated Press article to amuse me. Fans who were lucky enough to be in attendance for the first stop on "Mike Tyson's World Tour" were treated to twelve golden minutes of M...
About Last Night...
• College Football: WVU 37, UConn 11. Connecticut quarterbacks combined to go 15-of-34 for 115 yards and 2 interceptions. Scouts say they could be the next Harrington and Culpepper. • NBA Preseason: Nets 102, 76ers, 92. And just because I'll probably never get another chance to say it: 76ers leading...
Mike Tyson Would Like To Help You Carry Those Groceries To Your Car
Meet the new Mike Tyson. He's relaxed, he's sweet; he's whistling a happy tune. Frankly, we'd be less surprised if Kim Jong Ill suddenly began a tour of the U.S. singing old Bobby Sherman hits, but there you have it. There's a bluebird on his shoulder. Are we as a nation ready for this? Tyson appe...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while cracking under the pressure in the bottom of the eighth and running out into the night, pantless ... • MLB: National League Championship Series ... it seems like only yesterday, or 1968, that Cardinals played Tigers in a World Series. • College football: Our Tar Heels football ...
Tommy Morrison's Confusing Confusion
Far be it from us to deny a guy the opportunity to make a living, and we consider ourselves open-minded ... but we had to say, when there's open debate as to whether or not are HIV-positive, we kind of think maybe you shouldn't be boxing....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while wondering if your son will ever grow up to be a Chunky Soup All-Star ... • MLB: National League Championship Series, Game 6 ... You know, all told, Maine's a nice state. • NHL: Cruelty to Penguins ... Brodeur's milestone lifts Devils, 2-1. • Soccer: Even if we were soccer exper...
Five Tiny Tidbits On: The Charlotte Bobcats
It's hard to believe, but the NBA season is just around the corner. So come with us now as we present five tiny tidbits on each team, just to get you in the mood. Today we continue with the Southeast Division, so do us a favor and send your tips to [email protected]....
Mike Tyson Would Like You To Pay Him So He Can Have Sex With You
Think you guys can handle one more Mike Tyson bit? Sure, why not, right?...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while constructing your four-can beer hat ... • MLB: NLCS, Game 5. Cardinals 4, Mets 2 ... Albert Pujols has a very strange way of showing us that he's injured. • NBA: Well, apparently it's time to start talking about LeBron James again. • NHL: Sabrematic! There's trouncing an oppone...
Come Watch Mike Tyson Fight A Kangaroo
So, it's come to this. You thought Mike Tyson had hit bottom? You know nothing of the bottom, my friend. You can't handle the bottom! As part of Mike Tyson's World Tour which launches on Friday, the 40-year-old announced that some of his opponents may be women....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while waiting for your crutches to be released from the Miami-Dade Police Department evidence room ... • NFL: We hate to point this out, but Charles Barkley correctly predicted this one just before halftime. • NHL: Gotta support the team ... Rangers beat Devils 4-2 to the chagrin of ...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while falling into a burnin' ring of fire ... • MLB: National League Championship Series ... Hello, I'm Carlos, and I'll be your waiter this evening. Tonight our special is battered Cardinal. Our series is tied 2-2, so enjoy. • NFL: Denver's defense reaches milestone, but then it was...