bo Page 999 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Why Your Hometown Columnist Sucks: Bob Ryan
By all accounts, Bob Ryan was once a good writer. But then something happened. The molten lava, burning his features. The painful reconstruction. The cryptic words: "Rise, Lord Vader." Yes, Bob Ryan's journey to the dark side is now complete. With his ubiquitous presence on Around the Horn and Par...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while wrapping Christmas pres ... hey, where's the cat? • Monday Night Football: Seahawks stomp Eagles 42-0. If this is parity, we'd like to see the alternative. • NBA: Brand's 37 points lead first-place Clippers over Heat. Yes, we said "first-place Clippers." We know. Odd. Now let's...
Gotta Support The Team
When we were a kid, we would always stay in the stadium hours after Illinois football games ended so we could watch the players and press meet by the tunnel to the locker rooms; something about balding paunchy men interviewing people 30 years their junior fascinated us even then. We never quite ha...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while proposing ... • NFL: Giants beat Cowboys 17-10, unrealistically rasing your expectations once again. • NBA: Kobe clinches win with free throws as Lakers beat adorably named Bobcats. • College Basketball: It's in the hole! Dockery's 40-foot heave cleans Virginia Tech's clock....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while watching Dave and Oprah make out ... • NBA: Kobe fouls out, Lakers still beat Jazz in OT. There's a new sheriff in town. Say it with us: Sasha Vujacic. • College Basketball: Nick Fazekas leads Nevada over Kansas. The sentence you thought you might go your whole life without rea...
Beleaguered "NFL Countdown" Closed Captioning Typists Get One-Week Reprieve
We were on a very slow-moving piece of public transportation and therefore are just hitting the late news: Michael Irvin has been suspended for one week following his arrest last Friday for having a "pipe" in his car. This is only two days after handsomely named ESPN exec Norby Williamson said "Ri...
Bret Boone's Dangerous Golf Cart Exploits
We love the Las Vegas Review-Journal's gossip column, because it's excellent about disproving that whole what-happens-in-Vegas-stays-in-Vegas bunk. Their big get today is totally-not-a-guy-whose-career-collapsed-once-he-got-off-steroids former All-Star Bret Boone, who went a little crazy at the Wy...
Holyfield Eager To Be Pummeled Again
If you were thinking that "Dancing With The Stars" hoofer Evander Holyfield was actually retiring, like, seriously this time, well, you're wrong again. Holyfield, who is 43 years old, has said as soon as he gets out of his contract with Don King, he will continue his quixotic attempt to regain his...
Solich Party Photos!
In case you were wondering if Ohio coach Frank Solich's drunk driving arrest incident was an entirely isolated incident, here's some photos of the coach chilling at an Ohio bar with some students, posing, having some fun. Anyone, of course, should feel free to go out and have some drinks. But som...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while assembling the plastic tree (it'll be the merriest Christmas ever!) ... • Killingsworth Softly With His Song: Duke barely survives against Indiana in college hoops. • NBA: Knicks beat Bulls by nine — those 45 free throws they made may have played a role. • NHL: Sharks suffer 10...
Buy Manny's Apartment!
As speculation continues that Manny Ramirez will be long gone from Boston by the end of the season, it's now official that he's selling his condo at the primo Ritz Carlton Penthouse building....
Michael Irvin's Selective Memory
Yesterday, we were wondering when, exactly, ESPN found out about "analyst" Michael Irvin's arrest last week. Well, USA Today's intrepid Michael Hiestand talked to Bristol brass for today's paper, and it turns out, they found out Sunday, two days after the arrest ... but not from Irvin....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while playing "Zathura" ... • College Basketball: Illinois wins at North Carolina to avenge title-game loss. It's all downhill from here. • NBA: McGrady (we refuse to call him T-Mac) scores 25 to help Rockets end seven-game losing streak. • NHL: Lemieux returns, but Flightless Arctic...
Fun With Trade Rumors
We like it when the Internet has something before the Jayson Starks of the world do, so we're gonna run with this, because it's the end of November and not much is more fun than a good trade rumor. According to MLB Trade Rumors, the St. Louis Cardinals are "close" to a "major" move, with sources s...
A Day In The Life Of The "New" Michael Irvin
Well, it's the day after Michael Irvin's endless string of mea culpas following his arrest on Friday, and if Irvin's appearances had anything in common, it was their high proportion of "mea" to "culpa." Let's look back at Irvin's trip through the ESPN empire:...
Sleepless In Athens, Ohio
You wake up to the light in your eyes. Blinking, you try to adjust. The man with the light is very authoritative, and more than a little pissed. You must have been asleep for a while. Jesus, what time is it?...
About Last Night ...
What you missed while playing with the brand new sonogram you bought ... • NFL: Colts trample Steelers 26-7 to go 11-0, setting up everyone for ultimate disappointment at some point in the near future. • NBA: Nuggets lose to Nets, Carmelo injured — is there really a reason to go on? • NHL: Jimmy How...
Analyzing Irvin's Explanation, Matlock Style
All right, so we know we've harped on this quite a bit already, but we don't want to be all flippant and blog-like on you here: We have to delve into this Michael Irvin business a little bit more. You see, we want to dig down deep into Mr. Irvin's explanation of why there was a pipe in his car, ex...
Michael Irvin's Curious Company
OK, time for a Michael Irvin update. On Friday, Irvin was cited for having drug paraphernalia in his automobile — wouldn't it be great if Irvin drove a Cooper Mini, by the way? — and yesterday (and today) he's defending himself....
About Last Night ...
What you missed while writing your Kill Bill death list ... • NFL: Seahawks beat Giants in thrilling field goal display. • NBA: Lakers lose to Nets in OT. But Kobe gets his touches, and that's all that really matters, right? • NHL: Modin's two power-play goals lead Lightning over Flightless Sea Crea...