bro Page 332 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Weekend Winner: LeBron The "Runaway Slave"
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Jesse Jackson's well-timed statement on LeBron James, which turned a controversy over a poor business decision into a firestorm over anything but....

Spaniard Gets Punched In The Face By Someone Other Than A Dutch Midfielder
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

They've Got High Apple Pie In The Sky Hopes!
Oh, the simple pleasures of a two-and-a-half-sport town. The LeBron shrine is not even entirely ash yet, and this nugget emerges from the Cleveland Browns public-relations machine:...

A LeBron-Jersey-Burning-Video Roundup
Cleveland did not burn itself down last night, but it seems that everyone took to YouTube to document the torching of LeBron jerseys. Here are a few such videos....

The Decision: Reconsidered
As you know, last night's LeBronnukah special on ESPN was THE MOST DRAMATIC HOUR IN THE HISTORY OF TELEVISION. In this video, we crank up the drama to 11. We hope you enjoy....

Counterpoint: LeBron James Is Not A Cocksucker
Yesterday, a guy who spent seven seasons with the team that drafted him announced he wanted to play basketball with his friends and win a lot of games. He wanted this so badly that he was willing to take a pay cut....

Armen Keteyian On A Stool, And Other Strange Scenes From The Greenwich LeBron Stakeout
Our man in Greenwich, Craig Fehrman, describes what it was like to wait for LeBron's Decision under a tree in a tony Connecticut town for hours with hordes of media and curious onlookers....

Cleveland Paper Calls Out King Without A Ring
The Plain Dealer gets the last word on LeBron's reign in Cleveland. This will come back to haunt them in photoshop form if he wins rings with the Heat. Meanwhile, here's a great roundup of various front pages this morning. [Charles Apple]...

Great Moments In Comic Sans History
In light of Dan Gilbert's laudable, laughable open letter to LeBron James, we proudly present an alternate history, in which Comic Sans is the font of choice (complete with needless scare quotes)....

LeBron Watch, Day 50: What ESPN Should Have Asked LeBron James
On a night when LeBron James became the most hated man in basketball, only one network had a chance to ask him tough questions about a decision that will shape the future the NBA. And, of course, they didn't do that....

Art Modell Hated Worse In Cleveland Than LeBron, Says Art Modell
Modell thinks those pansies will get over LeBron, unlike those still bitching and moaning about the original Browns. "I wish the team that gets him well. And as long as I do well, I'm fine." [News-Herald]...

Potential Vandals Beware: There Are Witnesses
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

LeBron's Departure Helps Tea Party, Political Writers In Desperate Need Of LeBron Angle
It's early, but this story on The Atlantic's web site might just be the most inane, half-assed piece of LeBron punditry you'll read today. Here, I'll summarize: LeBron made Ohio angry. Angry people join the Tea Party. The end....

Cavs Owner Channels Crazy Person: "Some People Think They Should Go To Heaven But NOT Have To Die To Get There"
Owner Dan Gilbert has written an open letter to Cavs fans in the sort of prose you normally find wrapped around a brick. Note the font: The guy makes Comic Sans seem sinister....

Fan-Burning-LeBron-Jersey Videos Are The New Fan-Screaming-In-Front-Of-TV Videos
Cleveland is having its very own Guy Fawkes Day right now. If you see any more of these out there, do let us know. [via @TreyKerby]...

IT'S FUCKING OVER: LEBRON TO HEAT SAYS... LEBRON
LeBron James made a decision. Here's video....

THIS SEALS IT: CLEVELAND NOT IN PICTURE SAYS..RANDOM ILLITERATE VANDALISM
Still no official ESPN "DECISION"...yet. (And they were right.)...

The Decision: The Open Thread
The wait is almost over. Use this as your open thread for all LeBronukkah festivities. If you're feeling especially morbid, watch the happenings unfold with the sad sack patrons of a bar in Cleveland. Prediction: The Blazers pull off a coup....

FIST-EXPLOSION: LEBRON STAYING IN CLEVELAND, SAYS..."CUBES"
"Which is exactly why I think he is going back to the Cavs. The sports world is full of uncertainties. When in doubt, go for the love." [BlogMaverick, artwork via 9GAG]...

BREAKING: GREENWICH ABSOLUTELY SWARMING WITH PEOPLE JUST SORT OF MILLING AROUND
Our man in Connecticut, Craig Fehrman, took this photo a couple hours ago across the street from the Greenwich Boys and Girls Club. Craig reports: "The only fans there were that kid and a parental-looking figure [in the Cavs jersey], who was spelling his last name like a pro."...