bs Page 187 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night ...
What you missed while fishing for freshwater Plimpies ... • MLB: Hello, my name is Carlos Zambrano. You killed my father. Now prepare to die. • Tennis: Andy Roddick laps opponent at Indy. • Field hockey: Oh no! Well, now I have lost the will to live....

Remembering Harry Caray's Last Broadcast
The intrepid souls at Joe Sports Fan have dug up tape of the final game Harry Caray every broadcast. The game was September 21, 1997. So much has changed, but Harry was always the same....

True Stars Shine In Los Angeles
Thank God they finally got that out of the way. For weeks we've been inundated with coverage of David Beckham's American debut. Now that those anti-climactic 12 minutes of play have come and gone perhaps everybody will just calm down for a little while. Like any other fan of American soccer I'm glad...

Beware The Tempest That Is The Chicago Cubs
Hey, thanks for reviving me; those smelling salts really did the trick. If you hadn't come along when you did, I would have missed my bus. It's just that something I heard a few minutes ago really shocked me, and I went down like a carp. Passed right out. Yep, just two little sentences, uttered in t...

You Cannot Handle The Truth Of Bill James
We are a longtime admirer of famed baseball thinker Bill James. (We might make fun of Rob Neyer a bit around here, but we — like a lot of you, we suspect — have Neyer to thank for our initial awareness of James' work.) He opened our eyes to so many new concepts in the game we love, and, all told, we...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your cat demands an iPod ... • Golf: American Century Championship, first round, at Lake Tahoe, Nev. At least Berman's not here. [ESPN2] • MLB: Pittsburgh at Atlanta. A more compelling matchup you'd be hard to find. [TBS] • Softball: KFC World Cup of Softball, round robin, USA vs. C...

Who Will Be the Next Sports Figure To Get Gastric Bypass Surgery?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

A Perfectly Appropriate Keepsake
Under normal circumstances, we couldn't imagine a way that we would ever buy our father a birthday present — August 6, everybody; postmark Bryan Leitch, Mattoon, Illinois! — that's a piece of Chicago Cubs memorabilia. But this might just be an exception....

Mark Cuban Could Be Wrigley's Purveyor Of Jocularity
Cubs fans, beware: There's a possibility that Lou Piniella could end up working for Mark Cuban. That would be a calm partnership and in no way combustible....


Richard Gasquet Is Your Not-Gay Semifinalist
Roger Federer, staving off a surprising surge from longtime rival Rafael Nadal, won his fifth consecutive Wimbledon yesterday. (His first Wimbledon win was over that idiot on that dumb NBC reality show, by the way.) But the real winner wasn't Federer, but semifinalist Richard Gasquet, who finally ba...

Who dares challenge Pennsylvania's status as the country's marble-playing powerhouse? Certainly not you, I hope. The Keystone State is home to 66 national marble champions. Here's something else I learned today: One who plays the game of marbles is known as a "mibster." Please discard your Word-of-t...


About Last Night ...
What you missed while doubling down on a pair of tens ... • MLB: Yankees terror alert level raised to whatever color that is in Steinbrenner's face ... • Golf: Cristie Kerr wins U.S. Women's Open, can now afford to fix her first name. • Motor sports: Denny Hamlin makes with the vroom to win at New H...

Hey, Aramis Ramirez Hit A Home—YeeeeeOW!
The high-five being replaced with the prostate-massage ... long, long, overdue. But if this Cubs winning streaks goes much longer, I shudder to think of what's going to start happening in that dugout. Bat boys are going to have to be replaced with jizzmoppers....

Paris Hilton Gets Out Of Jail, This Guy Goes In ... It's The Circle Of Liiiffe ...
We knew that once you begin letting fans vote on the All-Star roster, it's only a matter of time before some of them begin leaping onto the field to make pitching changes. This "numbskull," as the Chicago Sun-Times described him, was just a few feet from reaching Cubs pitcher Bob Howry in the ninth ...

Which Athlete Will Be The Next Gay Blog Obsession?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

And Suddenly That Giant Hog Story Looks So Unimpressive
We like bears. As Robert Klein once said, they are the most helpful of all the animals. "If you have to be stuck in an elevator, it might as well be with a bear. 'Can you reach up there, bear?' 'Well, I think I can try ...' " But when a bear is attacking your six-year-old son, there's only one thing...