bu Page 389 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
MLS Player Gets His Dick Grabbed, Gets A Yellow Card For Flopping
It's really hard to say who comes off worse here. On the one hand, we've got New York Red Bulls defender Jamison Olave clearly grabbing a handful of Real Salt Lake forward Olmes Garcia's dick and balls. On the other hand, we've got Garcia shamelessly diving and trying to sell the idea that Olave lit...
There Are Just Two Real Bids For The Bills, But They're Big Money
The deadline for preliminary bids to purchase the Buffalo Bills has passed, and according to reports, a surprisingly low number of bids came in: of the 15 groups that have signed non-disclosure agreements, only three submitted formal bids, and only two of them appear to be serious. But even if it's ...
Home Run Explodes In Woman's Beer Cup
At least three people tried to catch this home run—although "tried" might be a stretch for the guy in orange—and it eluded all of them. With all the hands in front of her face, this poor woman made no attempt whatsoever to catch the ball, and probably assumed at least one of the dudes around her w...
The Rangers Brought Out George W. Bush During Jeter Farewell Ceremony
Since everyone knows this is Derek Jeter's last season, teams are putting on special ceremonies (like they did with Mariano Rivera) for Jeets, where they give him gifts and make donations to his charity. Tonight is the last time Derek Jeter will be playing a regular season game in Texas (hey, you ...
The Pirates Couldn't Have Made Two Sadder Outs Than These
How do you turn getting walked to load the bases into getting picked off for a double-play? A good way to start is to be the Pirates....
Andre Reed Says "Fuck Bon Jovi" And Anyone Who Wants To Move The Bills
Andre Reed wants to tell you how he feels, how he really feels. And it probably will involve copious amounts of "fuck" and one drop of "motherfucker." ...
The Real Negrodamus: On Chris Rock's Hilariously Prescient <em>Born Suspect</em>
Chris Rock said white people would never let it happen. A plan would be devised....
Josh Harrison Overshoots Second Base, Somehow Escapes Rundown
Pirates utility man Josh Harrison overshot second base on his steal attempt in Sunday's game against the Rockies, so he took his only option left and kept going to third. It worked!...
Dodgers And Diamondbacks AAA Teams In Sprawling, Benches-Clearing Brawl
Tempers flared in the second inning with the first pitch of the at bat between Reno Aces (AZ) pitcher Mike Bolsinger and Albuquerque Isotopes (LA) shortstop Erisbel Arruebarrena. Bolsinger threw up and in and Arruebarrena had to duck out of the way, as the pitch hit his bat for a foul ball. Arrueb...
The Bucs' MRSA Outbreak Appears To Have Ended Carl Nicks's Career
The Buccaneers and Carl Nicks are "mutually" parting ways, and according to the press release, which quotes Nicks as saying he's going to "step away from the game," it sure sounds like the guard is done with football. A MRSA infection will do that to you....
Bulldog Mascots Are Doomed, Flatulent, And Beloved
Excerpted from Travels With Casey: My Journey Through Our Dog-Crazy Country....
25 Years Ago Today...
...couple of classic Hip Hop Records were released. ...
Prospective Bills Ownership Group Studied Toronto Stadiums
Fans in Western New York need not panic over the fact that the Bon Jovi/Rogers/Tanenbaum group bidding on the Bills has identified three potential stadium sites in Ontario should they purchase the team. So what if a group with more money than god and strong ties to Toronto has reportedly conducted a...
Ryan Raburn Defensive Meltdown Leads To Easiest Inside-The-Parker Ever
We've seen bad defense from Ryan Raburn before, but this is really something....
Madison Bumgarner Can Dominate Without You Even Noticing
Last night's game between the Giants and Phillies was interrupted by a rain delay in the 4th inning that lasted nearly an hour. Under normal circumstances, this would have been a good time to just abandon watching the game altogether, but Madison Bumgarner was on the mound for the Giants, and that...
Naked Burger Thieves On The Lam In Florida Beach Town
Listen. Sometimes it's 3:06 in the morning, you and a couple of your buddies are wandering around a beach town in various states of undress, and suddenly you have need of 60 hamburgers, three pounds of bacon, three red peppers, and, uh, a paddleboard. Immediately! And the grocery stores are cl...
Bills WR Sammy Watkins Trips, Recovers, Makes Terrific One-Handed Catch
There aren't many interesting happenings in the training camp period of the NFL season, but Sammy Watkins's catch in practice today is a nice little highlight....
Don't Cut Your Hamburgers In Half
Before we get to the Funbag, you should know that very soon, it's going to be time for the 32-part satanic incantation of our WHY YOUR TEAM SUCKS NFL previews. So much sucking to do! So if your team sucks (and I do mean your team; don't be the asshole Redskins fan who writes in to bitch about the ...
Watch Arsenal Players Try And Fail To Talk Like New Yorkers
We've all had one too many drinks and suddenly decided it was a great time to impress people with our spot-on English accent. Right? Right?!? ...