bu Page 617 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Charlie Weis, Unsuccessful In Obese Litigation
Say what you will about Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis, but you can't say he isn't constantly charging forward. Whether it's recruiting, attacking a Cover 2 or, you know, gastric bypass surgery, the guy makes up his mind and just GOES FOR IT, MAN. Suck Off The Fat Like A Champion. Unfortunately, such...

Andrew Bogut, Looking Even Dumber
What you see right here is something that you cannot unsee: It's how Bucks center Andrew Bogut has decided to wear his hair now....

Italics Are Awesome
To keep the comments as fresh and outstanding as they've been up to this point, we've commissioned Commenting Guru Rob Iracane to write a bi-weekly Comment Ombudsman column. It runs every other week. This is that week....

No Bonds For You!
As you may have noticed, Barry Bonds is being held out of the final game of San Francisco's series at Milwaukee (in progress). So it looks like he won't be making any progress towards Henry Aaron's prized record on my watch. Oh well, I'll just have to keep staring at my Arizona State throwback jerse...

Confirmed Family Man Is Having a Good Weekend
Alex Rodriguez tallied his 497th career homerun during a day/night doubleheader curb-stomping of those pesky D-Rays. The Yankees one won the first game by four runs, a fairly respectable margin. Once the sun went down shit got ugly—17-5 ugly. Luis Vizcaino got the win in both games and Shelley Dunca...

The Night Time Is The Right Time
It's been confirmed that David Beckham will not start tonight in his debut with the LA Galaxy, however he has indicated that he will suit up and play. The questions remaining are at what point will he enter the game, and how long will his tender pussy ankle allow him to go on. Blah blah blah. The re...

We're Guess Jack Daniels Will Cost About 12 Bucks
Good news! If Tampa Bay Buccaneers get confused by the 73 quarterbacks they'll have on their team this year, they will be able to douse their pain with the sweet nectar of hard liquor....

Well, Expect The Quality Of Hoops In Italy To Decrease Dramatically
Knicks fans, you're in luck! You've been waiting for someone to ship Stephon Marbury's ass to some other country for years now, and it looks like he's gonna go ahead and do it himself. You're gonna have to wait a couple of years, though....

Adam Laroche Knows Comedy
You know, it's really difficult to find a species of human being with a more refined sense of humor than a professional baseball player. Hell, the Padres all urinate on each other, after all....

About Last Night ...
What you missed while eating 15 million ice-cream treats ... • MLB: Sheff hits an "all the way black" granny in Tigers' 6-3 win. • Cycling: Belgian Tom Boonen takes Tour's 6th stage on a BMX bike. • CFL: Bombers lose to Inuit; Stegall still stuck on history....

This Man Will Teach You How To Hurt
Former Steelers linebacker Greg Lloyd was one of those guys you have to be pleased discovered the game of football. Unchecked aggression in the real world is scary enough; if he hadn't had the outlet of football, who knows what he might have been capable of....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your iPod demands more songs with fiddles ... • Boxing: Junior middleweights, Joel "Meat" Julio vs. Cornelius "Cornholio" Bundrage, at Hollywood, Calif. Who needs sleep? Not us. [ESPN2] • Cycling: Tour de France, Stage 4, Villers-Cotterets to Joigny, France. For all of your previous...

Platt Vs. Turturro, For All The Ham
If you haven't gotten brought up to speed on The Bronx Is Burning just yet, fret not: It's pretty easy to catch up. Oliver Platt yells, John Turturro yells, Sam shoots people, Reggie hits homers. (The Dugout recap sums it up rather well.)...

It's Your All-Star Game Live Blog, Ya'll
We run this picture, not because there's any particular reason to run it, but because it's the All-Star Game tonight, and we will never, ever tire of looking at this picture. It has been five years since the ultimate Bud Selig befuddled moment — honestly, just look at that picture again; doesn't it ...


Worry Not, Everybody: You'll Be Seeing Plenty Of Bud Selig
We know that you, like us, have been on your proverbial pins and your proverbial needles wondering whether or not baseball commissioner Bud Selig would attend the game in which Barry Bonds destroys our collective faith in humanity by breaking Hank Aaron's home run record. Wonder no longer!...

Shockingly, The ESPN Movie Isn't Getting Great Reviews
We will confess, we have been, in spite of ourselves, kind of looking forward to the premiere of The Bronx Is Burning tonight. We know, ESPN's movies have been rather awful, and we are dealing with the guy who directed Benny And Joon....