This Man Will Teach You How To Hurt

Former Steelers linebacker Greg Lloyd was one of those guys you have to be pleased discovered the game of football. Unchecked aggression in the real world is scary enough; if he hadn't had the outlet of football, who knows what he might have been capable of.

To run through his rap sheet, he:

• Was charged with aggravated assault for sticking a pistol in his son's mouth. (To be fair, it was for poor grades.) • Pointed another gun at his wife. • Was charged with stalking his wife after stealing her mail as she — amazingly — filed for divorce.

Clearly, this is a guy you want teaching your children martial arts.

The former Steeler linebacker, famous for his "I Wasn't Hired for My Disposition" and "Real Men are Black" t-shirts, is a 4th-degree instructor at Oh Do Kwan Martial Arts, topped only by the one and only Master Joaquin Bonilla (no relation to Bobby) in the Oh Do Kwan hierarchy. According to the always-reliable Wikipedia, Lloyd has a black belt in Tae Kwon Do.

We suspect the job interview was short, and might not have even included words.

Learn From Master Greg Lloyd [Mondesi's House]