chicago Page 134 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bo Knows This Won't End Well
Former Domer pitcher/receiver Jeff "The Shark" Samardzija made his Major League debut yesterday afternoon in a relief appearance for the Chicago Cubs. The 23 year-old rookie struck out a pair of Marlins in the two-inning outing, but he failed to pickup the hold after beginning the seventh inning wi...

Bartman Spurns $25k Autograph Offer
Putting a quick end to the will he or won't he autograph spectacle, Steve Bartman is not going to appear at the National Sports Collectors Convention in Rosemont, Illinois. Interestingly, Bartman issued the response through his friend Frank Murtha. Meaning that Bartman himself remains hidden away i...

Alexei Ramirez Has A Magical Glove
It's not like White Sox second baseman Alexei Ramirez has gone unnoticed for his hustle and defensive prowess thus far, but come on; this is close to supernatural. Look at this play by Ramirez in the seventh against the Rangers on Wednesday; sleight of hand worthy of the Magic Castle. Wizard Cat gra...

Rex Grossman or Kyle Orton? A Coin Flip Shall Decide Chicago's Quarterbacking Fate
It's only July and already Bears fans are terrified. Who's going to start at quarterback: The mediocre bearded guy or the mediocre short guy? Well, even the players themselves can't decide. So they did what any reasonable, competitive football player would do...they flipped a coin. Cue the Chicago T...

Steve Bartman Offered $25k for a Single Autograph
Reclusive Cubs anti-christ Steve Bartman has incentive to come out into the light of day thanks to a $25k autograph offer from a sports collectors show. According to the Orlando Sentinel this would be the most ever paid to a living person for a single autograph. What exactly does Bartman need to do...

Mike Ditka's Balance Is Not What It Used To Be
I've never been to a celebrity roast for anyone but I like to think this happens every time. Paul Hornung takes the stage and welcomes the roastee to the rostrum, roastee is wasted, knocks over his own table when standing, and then crumbles to the ground when shoved by Hornung. See Mr. Bear's finest...

Sammy Sosa Dissed By All-Star Signage
I'm no Cubs fan, but I'm pretty sure that Aramis Ramirez does not in fact own the Cubs' franchise record for home runs with 38. I can think of about eight players off the top of my head who had more; and Big League Stew can come up with even more. But since this is on the scoreboard at the All-Star ...

These Are Clapping Dogs, Rhythmic Dogs, First-Pitching Dogs, House Dogs, Street Dogs
Uno, who I believe was named for the card game I never bothered to learn, continues to blaze trails for doggykind. Back in February, he became the first beagle ever to win the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show (though Snoopy remains the first to be a World War I flying ace). Yesterday, he "threw" ou...

Cubs Fans Drink Early, Die Nearby
The gimlet eyed besuboru fans at Home Run Derby spotted a Cubs fan handing his kid what looks like a beer during yesterday afternoon's game against the Giants at Wrigley. Corey Hart's daughter is jealous that he gets it in a cup. Maybe the dad wants him to get alcohol poisoning to ensure placement i...

On Vincent Gallo, Black Gallagher And Rotten.com Videos
This video has been online for about a year now, but I just saw it for the first time today. It's brutal, punishing and so uncalled for that it should come with a Tipper Gore warning. It's from 2001, when my immortal beloved Rick Ankiel was still struggling with his "control" and some minor leagu...

Sun-Times Guilty Of Blog Swiping?
The Chicago Sun-Times ran a front-page story today about the firing of Chicago State baseball coach Husain Mahmoud for some egregious resume fabricating, but was it their story? It appears the Sun Times' story ran a little late compared to the ones published on June 12th by Babes Love Baseball and C...

Pester Ozzie Guillen Enough On E-mail And He Will Respond Accordingly
White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen's verbal attacks on reporters, general managers, players, fans, and blow-up dolls are somewhat disturbing, if not highly entertaining for those of us who don't have to deal with them directly. But did you know you too can be eviscerated by Ozzie if you type with the a...

We Who Are About To Die Salute You
The Cubs really don't have a reasonable explanation as to why they suck so relatively badly on the road. The White Sox beat the Cubs 5-1 on Sunday to complete a three-game sweep, the North side's eighth loss in the past 12 games. And here we see Mr. Kerry Wood trying to explain it, as you probably s...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while seeing the downside of Spain's title......

Midwestern Brawls Are So Much More Polite
Such a heartening sight, seeing Cubs and White Sox fans come together to stomp the shit out of a bothersome fan in their midst. But what could elicit such solidarity? Busted Coverage had the report and video:...

Windy City Teams On Verge Of Trading Sweeps; Kerry Wood Not Pleased
Despite getting the catchy nickname of "One of the most consistent hitters in the game" by teammate Matt Murton, Aramis Ramirez failed to take advantage of a lead-off double in the 9th by Derrek Lee. With one out and Lee on third, Bobby Jenks forced the Cubbie into grounding out weakly to short when...

About Last Night
What you missed while abusing your new monkey rights......

Welcome To The Battle Of Chicago
Now that's what I'm talking about. This is how you do a rivalry, people. North Side vs. South Side, Ozzie vs. Lou. Plenty of trash talk. Copious amounts of Ryan Dempster. Let's get it on! When Round 1 was over on Sunday the Cubs had done it; swept the White Sox in the Friendly Confines. Round 2 comi...

Cubs Go For the Sweep On the North Side
If the White Sox are going to come out of Wrigley with a win in this series, they'll need a good performance from Javier Vasquez. The Cubs counter with Ryan Dempster, who cannot possibly be this good. I'm going to call it a weekend, but I expect all of you DUANers to play nicely with each other. Whe...

Goodnight, Baseball Hall Of Fame Game
It's a sad day, folks: Today marks the last ever Hall of Fame game in Cooperstown, N.Y. As much fun as it might have been, it does seem like a pain for players, to go all the way to Cooperstown in the middle of the season for an exhibition game, though we do hope it throws the Cubs (who are playing...