chicago Page 138 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kyle Orton Is Just Getting Warmed Up
Don't worry, folks: Deadspin Hall of Famer Kyle Orton isn't going anywhere: He'll be back in the Bears uniform next year....
It Has Been A Decade Since We Lost Harry Caray
On this slow February sports day, the biggest news today is probably still the saddest: It has been 10 years today since Harry Caray shambled off this mortal coil....
Blackhawks, Brawls And Brewskies
Since tedious analysis is the stuff of "power rankings," each Monday NHL Closer writer Greg Wyshynski uses a form of universal expression: Success in terms of beer. Before we get to the fury of fists that was Oilers/Canucks, welcome to The Brewmeister Ratings......
Ryan Dempster Says ... No Wait ... He Says ... Really ... The Cubs ... Ha ... Sorry, We Just Can't
You'll have to forgive us, considering this happened pretty early in the day yesterday, but, well ... sometimes we just can't help ourselves. We have to point out legendary romantic Ryan Dempster's bold proclamation for the Cubs this season....
The White Sox Are Hunting Wabbit
Home Run Derby points out that the White Sox will be wearing these camo jerseys on July 4 next year....
Bear Down, Barack Obama
We'd completely forgotten about this, even though it's from our home state and followed it pretty closely when it was happening, so we have to thank Sports By Brooks for reminding us: Barack Obama, when he ran for U.S. Senate from Illinois in 2004, was this close to running against ... DITKA!...
Commit To the Indian, Bitches!
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of The FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....
Clearly, The First Cubs' Japanese Player
Because we're hankering for baseball already and need something to get our dander up, here's the new marketing campaign the Cubs have put together for Kosuke Fukudome. Looks great, right? Well ... that image is a rather offensive one for millions of people....
Isiah Passes Grueling Two-Week Evaluation Of Self
Isiah Thomas gave himself two weeks to get his act together, or he would fire himself as coach of the New York Knicks. The two weeks were up on Tuesday, so what's the verdict? Although the Knicks finished 1-4 during that span — including four straight losses — Isiah happily announced on Tuesday that...
When The Saints Go Golfing
It's hard to imagine that less than 12 months ago these two teams were meeting for a chance to play in the Super Bowl. Seriously, they were. I looked it up! Devin Hester (The Jester Molester) returned a 64 yard punt, Neckbeard Orton threw the ball like he was throwing back girly cocktails, and just ...
Scott Skiles' Christmas Present To Bulls Fans
You know it's a bad sign when you're fired on Christmas Eve, and nobody even bothers to give you the obligatory, "aw, the guy got canned right before the holidays" comments. Yeah, it's safe to say Bulls fans aren't going to miss Scott Skiles all that much....
Kyle Orton Takes Step Toward REAL Hall Of Fame
There is some sort of perception that, somehow, we're making fun of Bears quarterback Kyle Orton for his induction in our Hall of Fame. Nothing could be further from the truth. We cheer for Orton full-heartedly and with complete sincerity; it's easy to root for a guy who's obviously having that muc...
Bears Upset Packers, Their Quarterback Sort Of Helped
A cursory look at the 1 o'clock games led one to make a face comparable to sniffing a plate of expired deli meat. But sometimes expired meat is salvageable, which led to the creation of the hot dog. Similarly, this bundle of games gave us a couple of surprises....
And Ladies ... He's Single
No real reason for this post, except to point out that this is possibly the most awesome image of Kyle Orton ever captured....
Purple Jesus And His Pop Warner Buddies
Far be it from us to impugn the reputation of a team that has won five in a row and looks, on paper, to be one of the hottest teams in the NFL, but ... heavens to Betsy, if that's what a playoff team looks like, sheesh, when's baseball season?...
We Still Have Faith
Don't worry, Kyle: You're always a winner in our book....