closer Page 26 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Dirk Exorcizes Some Demons
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or wearing skinny ties, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy....
Introducing The College Basketball Closer
Starting today, the College Basketball Closer will be written (more or less) daily by Jonah Keri. Jonah's work has appeared in a bunch of different publications, including ESPN.com, Baseball Prospectus, the New York Times, the New York Sun and YESNetwork.com. E-mail your questions, comments or Clare...
Mother Nature Snowballs Bettman
Today's NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of The FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer. Enjoy....
Hatcher Goes Wacky Time
This is the final NHL Closer (for now) be written by the fine folks at Melt Your Face Off. Enjoy....
Lakers Come Up A Little Short
Ha, nice shorts! It was 1980s retrospective night at the Staples Center on Sunday, the Lakers stylin' with short shorts, assistant coach Kurt Rambis sporting a fake mustache, and the Laker Girls wearing spandex. No word as to whether Nicholson dropped 25 pounds and came dressed as The Joker. (A tre...
Keep Your Motor Runnin'
The NBA Closer is written by Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or talking in the third person, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast....
Closing Time
Due to piss poor time management, today's NHL Closer will once again share a post with college football and basketball. Sorry for the inconvenience. I started playing '1942' on my new Capcom plug-and-play and well ... the red enemy planes kept giving me extra loop power-ups! What was I to do? Not us...
How Do You Like 'Dem Apples, Riley?
My Christmas holiday summed up in five words or less: Clementines, Toblerones and beer. No joke. A million thanks to Alphonso Jackson, Nancy K. Kopp and, of course, Rick Chandler for filling in while I was gone. Your 'Body Shop' gift certificates are in the mail. Now, on to the NBA Closer!...
"You Gotta Support the Meme"
For the rest of 2007, the NHL Closer will be written by the fine folks at Melt Your Face Off. Enjoy....
Blog Fight! Blog Fight!
Skeets, who was horribly trampled by adolescent goats while visiting the petting zoo, is still inactive and will be back next week. Today's Closer is written by Rick Chandler, Submersible Operations Coordinator at the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution ......
Knicks Ready To 'Turn The Page' After Tragic Coach Mauling
Our story so far: Skeets is still under quarantine in a small room at the Canadian border, and will not return to the NBA Closer until next week. Filling in today is Nancy K. Kopp, Chairman of the Board of Trustees of the Maryland Retirement and Pension Agency....
The Joy Division Closer
For the rest of 2007, the NHL Closer will be written by the fine folks at Melt Your Face Off. Enjoy....
Looking Toward January 1 In Buffalo
For the 12 of you back at work, Melt Your Face Off offers this preview of the NHL's Winter Classic to be held one week from now, and why it kicks the ass of the stupid Capital One Bowl....
In Portland, It's All About The Roy-Bot (And ESPN)
Rick Chandler continues to rock the NBA Closer all this week. Skeets will be back next week, though Rick's doing just fine, we think....
ManU's Very High Ankle Sprains
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. This column would have run Monday, but no one was reading the site on Monday....
Today's Episode: Isiah Has An Epiphany
Skeets is off celebrating Christmas Eve the way that all Canadians do; pantsless and migrating with a herd of elk. So your NBA Closer today is being written by United States Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Alphonso Jackson. Do enjoy....
Legace Takes His Puck And Goes Home
For the rest of 2007, the NHL Closer will be written by the fine folks at Melt Your Face Off. Enjoy....
Downsizing Impacts Everything, Even Closers
Due to budgetary setbacks, today's NHL Closer and ... um, whatever the hell we were calling the college basketball thing will share a post. We apologize for the inconvenience, and we fought this thing as far as we could before we thought a Photoshop of a basketball and a hockey puck would look reall...
Pretend It's A Playoff Game, And The Heat Are Suddenly Good Again
Let's see if I got this right. The Miami Heat are still supposed to be good because Shaquille O'Neal is still tall, Dwyane Wade is still making commercials, and Pat Riley's hair gel also doubles as a love potion, or so claimed the highly motivated salesman and his cardboard kiosk. But even after Wad...
Av Mercy
After their 4-3 overtime victory over the Rangers, the Colorado Avalanche said all the right things about how to replace injured comrades Joe Sakic and Ryan Smyth. "You can't," said Wojtek Wolski. "You don't," replied Scott Hannan. "But... you did," said the scoreboard. I mean, Wolski himself scored...