cog Page 38 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Daily Closer: Big Fun At Needle Park
Notes on the day in baseball:...

Your NL West "Preview"
Whew, last one. We'd like to point out a couple of the pictures above. First, we enjoyed choosing a picture of Tony Clark for the D-Backs one, considering he's the opposite of a Diamondback this year. Second: Steve Finley is on the Rockies? Wow!...

Baseball Season Preview: San Francisco Giants
You might remember, from back at the beginning of the NFL season, when we previewed each team by having a writer we liked write about their favorite team....

Barry Bonds Delivers One Into Your Gap
In the years that I've stopped paying attention, the memorabilia business has gone in directions I couldn't have anticipated... namely, up the ass....

Barry Bonds Never Can Say Goodbye
The most telling exceprt from KGO radio's big interview with Barry Bonds on Tuesday? It wasn't that Bonds has apparently been getting death threats (there's enough nuts out there to make that sadly inevitable). Nor was it that Bonds says he feels "exhausted" (honestly, when hasn't he?). We're not ev...

The Giants Are Obsessed With Paula Abdul
You might remember last year, when Barry Bonds became the only man to ever dress up as Paula Abdul and not need fake breasts. (It was for the yearly Giants' "American Idol" contest, or something.) Well, the Giants pulled off the stunt again this year, and we have to say, this whole Barry Bonds and B...

Bonds Contract: Baseball's Version Of A Constitutional Crisis?
So someone took the time to actually read the contract that Barry Bonds signed with the Giants on Monday, and they made a startling discovery. According to the fine print, Bonds not only must play both ends of any doubleheaders, he must dress as Paula Abdul in the second game. Also, there's this:...

Forever Barry
He's 43, kind of a dick and subject to a variety of ailments, including, if you believe the horse steroids charges, laminitis. But nonetheless, Barry Bonds is officially back in the fold with the San Francisco Giants, ready to tackle Mt. Aaron once again. Whew. We were on pins and needles....

Bonds And The Giants Just Can't Quit Each Other
Yesterday, Barry Bonds did nobody any favors by endorsing Pete Rose and Mark McGwire for the Hall of Fame, inspiring each of them to put their paws over their face like a goldendoodle puppy. But the bigger news might be that the Giants are considering voiding Bonds' contract after the news of his po...

Barry Bonds Unlikely To Stay "Pals" With Mark Sweeney Much Longer
Barry Bonds has been dodging, ducking and weaving the Inspector Javerts of Major League Baseball and the U.S. government for so long that it's almost second nature to him; he has moves that would make LaDainian Tomlinson envious. According to this morning's New York Daily News — which remains three ...

Breaking News! Baseball Player Signs Ridiculous Contract!
I'm so excited to tell you this I might as well just copy and paste the fucker:...

Curse Of The 1980s Giants Infield Continues
We are saddened this morning by reports of the death of former San Francisco Giants third baseman Chris Brown. We don't know what's going on with Giants infielders from the 1980s (Jose Uribe died in a car crash on Dec. 8), but Matt Williams, watch your back. Brown, who was Darryl Strawberry's teamma...

Bonds Back In Only Place That Truly Loves Him
Well, now we can breathe easy over here; Barry Bonds won't be going to St. Louis. (And now that he's not, we'd like to note that we would have never sold out our principles to root for him. Nope! No way! Obviously! Of course not!)...

Bonds In St. Louis, And What It Could Mean For The Human Condition
Part of being a sports fan is making internal deals with yourself. Sure, you might despise, say, Charles Oakley when he's on the other team, but when he's on your team, he's indispensable and the guy you scream for. No matter what he has done in the past, no matter how much he has hurt your team or ...

"Indictment? What Indictment? Let's JAM!"
As it becomes clear that Barry Bonds will indeed not be indicted today, with the possibility it could still happen hanging out there, we can look forward to a few more weeks of will-he or won't-he? The parlor game often distracts from the real story, and the real story, we can proudly say, was Bonds...

The Closer: It Hasn't Been A Barry Good Year
Notes from a day in baseball:...

The Closer: Giants No-Hitter Foiled By Hobbit
Thoughts on a day in baseball:...

Bonds' Anti-Climactic Trip To Shea
We've been fortunate enough, during our time here in New York, to see the Shea Stadium crowd riled up a few times, including our favorite, John Rocker's return to Shea for the first time, in June 2000, since his infamous 7 train remarks. (As was typical at the time, the crowd booed him lustily, an...
