college Page 386 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
FedEx: When You Absolutely, Positively Need Your Son's Team To Play In A BCS Conference
Memphis, stricken by Realignment Fever, is trying to negotiate their way into a bigger conference or, failing that, find a wealthy benefactor to buy them one. Thankfully, they (and their quarterback) have an international conglomerate at their disposal....
Nebraska Dumps Big 12 As NCAA Apocalypto Machine Continues To Churn
HOLY FUCKING HUSKER DICK. NEBRASKA HAS VACATED THE BIG 12 AND HAS FORMALLY APPLIED TO THE BIG 10, BUT SINCE TWO TEAMS LEFT THE BIG 12, WILL THERE BE TWO BIG 10'S NOW OR TWO BIG 12'S? CHEW ON THAT. [TeamSpeedKills]...
Ten (Fake) Memories Of John Wooden (From Someone Who Never Met Him)
"Coach had these specially designed pants that had holes in the seat. He used to place false teeth in his buttocks and collect loose change from sofas while sitting and talking to parents on recruiting trips." Share your own below. [Johnny America]...
Boise State To Mountain West; Course Of Human Existence, WAC Football Irrevocably Altered
APOCALYPSE! SCHOOL IN IDAHO THAT USED TO PLAY SPORTS AGAINST SMALLISH SCHOOLS IN WESTERN STATES NOW PLAYING SPORTS AGAINST SLIGHTLY LARGER SCHOOLS IN WESTERN STATES! [TheMWC.com]...
Here's A List Of Things That May Or May Not Happen Tomorrow
Sources tells us that all of the following things are true, unless they turn out not to be:...
Report: USC Football Gets 2-Year Bowl Ban
It only took six years, but USC is finally getting called to the NCAA principal's office. Postseason ban, loss of scholarships, games and possibly that 2004 national title. You know, now sounds like an excellent time to join the Pac-10....
College Wrestler Condom Bombs Officer With Puke-Filled Rubbers
The North Central College freshman lured out campus security with a fake call for a female needing an escort, and ambushed the officer with two condoms filled with vomit. I think I saw something similar in a Japanese porno once. [Daily Herald]...
Conference Realignment Will Tear Us All Apart
We're on the verge of the biggest conference realignment in the history of college sports, but if it happens ... will it still be college sports? Or just pro football that happens to take place near schools?...
An Alternate History Of The Miami Sorority Zoo Party Bus Of Doom
Earlier this week, we told you about the Zeta Tau Alpha sorority that was disciplined by Miami University for alleged drunken assaults on a limousine driver. Well, a friend of the Zetas have stepped up to defend their honor....
Today In "Bryce Harper Is A No-Good Hothead"
Bryce Harper is good at baseball and he knows it. He has a reputation as a bit of a whippersnapper, though, and after getting ejected last night for making a gesture at an ump, that rep will continue to grow....
Yet Another Miami Sorority Formal Ends In Drunken, Pukey Anarchy
The Fightin' Zeta Tau Alphas of Miami University became the third sorority at the Ohio school to be placed on probation this semester after a night of messy, over-served lunacy. At the zoo, of all places. Those poor animals....
Watch The Citadel And Elon University Baseball Teams Pound Each Other Mercilessly
Last night, Dash clued you in to the epic brawl between The Citadel and Elon's baseball teams. Here's the video for all of you that were too lazy to click a link. Tuck in that shirt while you're at it....
An Honest-To-Goodness College Baseball Brawl
A ninth-inning play at the plate lead to a ninth-inning brawl between Elon and the Citadel. And not one of those lame "let's come out of the dugout and look concerned" fake brawls you see in the pros....
College Baseball's Going To Fool Around With A Shot Clock
Today the SEC will begin using a scoreboard-mounted clock in an effort to speed up bases-empty situations during its conference tournament. Oh, please let it go off with a thunderous foghorn....
Pi Beta Phi: The Party-Menace Sorority Of The Midwest
Ohio University's branch of Pi Beta Phi held a winter formal and, just like their sisters at Miami University (of Ohio), they abandoned all forms of lady-likeness and terrorized the place where it was held. The Smoking Gun has the gory rundown....
Former Basketball Player Runs For Congress, Crazily
Remember Kevin Millen? The ex-Georgetown hoopster who stalked coach John Thompson and ended up getting two years' probation and a court order to stay away from D.C.? He's running for Congress on a tin-foil-hat platform, with a delightfully lo-fi web site....
Last Night's Winner: The Rest Of The NFC North
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Tarvaris Jackson's chances of starting, which look pretty bright since Brett Favre has hitched his latest comeback to the hopes of a long-shot college baseball team....
UNC Freshmen Start The Summer Off Right By Drinking On A Party Boat
Pictured is UNC freshmore John Henson with two girls who are likely in his statistics study group. At least they appear to be having as much — if not more — fun as stuntman-to-be Tyler Hansbrough. [COED Magazine, via]...
Wolpfack Typo Makes For Efic Pail
NC State issued their baseball media guide last week — then quickly took it down. Study it long enough, and you'll see why. Dyslexics of Raleigh...untie! [StateFansNation]...
Softball Conference Champs Just Want To Dance It Out (WINNER'S UPDATE)
Fresh off winning an Atlantic Sun conference championship, the Lipscomb Lady Bisons debuted a coordinated dance routine. Unfortunately, it brought them neither the replenishing rains that would ensure a bountiful harvest nor a Women's College World Series title....