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College Football Preview: #25 Fresno State Bulldogs
College football season begins in 17 days. We're rolling through the coaches' poll top 25 with previews from bloggers, fans, and assorted felons. Right now we have only two teams left to pick up, Wake Forest and BYU. So if you want either of these teams, take them now by emailing me [email protected]...
Ohio University Lineman Wins $250k in Lottery
Mike Eynon, a 6'3 305 pound senior lineman, walked into a BP just off campus and emerged with a winning ticket. As befits life as an indentured servant to the NCAA, one of his first telephone calls was to the campus compliance officer to ensure that winning the award didn't violate NCAA rules. He go...
Shocker: Cage-Fighting Alabama Fan's Legal Strategy Fails
Of course the legal strategy was pay a retarded man to take the blame for a fight you started. The fight happened at the 2005 Iron Bowl when an Alabama fan, Joey Barrett, Jr., yelled, "Roll Tide!" at an Auburn fraternity house. Oh, and the Alabama fan happened to be a cage fighter armed with a knife...
The Daily Dicky Comes to Kentucky
In the form of Kentucky's outspoken wide receiver Dicky Lyons, Jr.. You'll recall that Lyons spent SEC Media Days discussing his dreams about Georgia quarterback Matthew Stafford trying to steal away his fiancee. Now he's providing daily video updates as Kentucky prepares for their opening game agai...
University of Colorado Announces Valet Bike Parking For Football Games
Surely you jest. The University of Colorado couldn't really—this has to be made up, right? You can't expect to beat or even compete with five of the top 14 teams in the country if your university community is focused on valet bike parking. Well, you can if you're the crazy uncle of the Big 12. Welc...
Kige Ramsey Slanging SEC Knowledge
You've all been wondering, waiting, dreaming about what Kige thinks of the upcoming slate of SEC football teams. Well, rest easy my friends, the day you've been dreaming of has now arrived. Had you ever before been able to imagine what havoc 12 SEC helmets can wreak when they're handled by a gian...
Jimmy Clausen's Drinking Game Prowess Prompts Investigation By Notre Dame
Jimmy Clausen is the starting quarterback for Notre Dame. Last year he, along with the entire team, had a horrible season. Which was disappointing because Clausen, the nation's consensus top quarterback, committed to Notre Dame in such an understated fashion: By pulling up in a limo to the College ...
Elected Officials in Ohio Have Spent $400k on Buckeyes Tickets
What's more, they're allowed to buy the season tickets with campaign contributions. Wow. I know that many states allow elected officials to purchase seats to the games but I think most of them require them to use their own money. Or at least they should. The Chronicle of Higher Education has the de...
Georgia Football Players Celebrate Number 1 Ranking With Bar Brawl; Public Urination
You could totally see this coming. The Georgia summer semester ends on the same weekend that Georgia gets the number one ranking in the Coaches' Poll. And you expect college football players to behave themselves? Son, when were you born? Two Georgia players were treated at a hospital after being st...
Next time, I'm definitely using UPS for all of my point-guard shipping needs: "Out of 190,000 employees throughout the world, FedEx Express president and CEO David Bronczek, one of the company's most influential executives, had chosen to reach out to an ordinary customer service representative, work...
Oklahoma Kindly Allows Josh Jarboe to Pursue His Rap Career Full-Time
"Used to have a gun, now i'm at Oklahoma. N***a, I graduated from school, so you know I got my diploma...didn't get hit I put his ass in a coma." Those are the lyrics sung (rapped?) by freshman wide receiver Josh Jarboe in a grimy YouTube freestyle. As you might expect, the folks at Oklahoma U didn...
Wow! Top Basketball Recruit's Mom Overcame 190,000-1 Odds to Receive a Call From FedEx's CEO
And FedEx's CEO just happens to be a huge Memphis basketball booster—having donated at least $500k to Memphis athletics. What a happy coincidence! Man, it's amazing how these things work out. This is so shocking. Because prior to this instance Memphis head coach John Calipari has had such a squeaky...
USA Today Coaches' Poll Is Out
Ahh, the Coaches' Poll, when petty grievances come to light via the always democratic method of allowing 61 hated rivals to determine their best team. And who do the coaches anoint with their highly important preseason ranking? The Georgia Bulldogs. Wow. So Georiga is higher ranked by national coac...
Cracker Barrel Robbery: $158 in UNC, Duke Gear the Ill-Gotten Gains
In a move that leaves every person who has ever been to a Cracker Barrel aghast, two people made off with $158 in merchandise from the old country store yet left behind the wheels of cheese, butter churns, and large checker board pieces that you played on a quilt. Instead they filched North Carolin...
College Recruiting Budgets Are As Out of Control as Coaching Salaries
Yet no one mentions how rapidly the cost of competing for top talent is rising. Until, that is, the Chronicle of Higher Education issued this report dated August 1. The key finding is that almost half of colleges doubled or tripled the amount of money they spent on recruiting in the last decade. In ...
Les Miles and Snoop Dogg Are Boyzzzz
In one of the more incongruous pairings of this American life, Snoop Dogg showed up at a rotary club meeting to express his approval of LSU head coach Les Miles. Snoop's move has, no doubt, further ignited the West Coast-Southeast football feud that has claimed so many lives in the past five years....
West Virginia Quarterback Pat White Says WVU Baseball Coach Greg Van Zant Isn't Fond of Black Players
Usually nothing that interesting happens at media days. Sometimes players like Kentucky's Dicky Lyons confess to having dreams about other quarterbacks in the league. A subpoena gets tossed here and there. And, you know, occasionally a top Heisman candidate like Pat White says West Virginia's baseba...
West Virginia Basketball Players Arrested at Pittsburgh Pirates Game
It's almost as if Bob Huggins doesn't have control of his players. Even when they're at Pittsburgh Pirates-Colorado Rockies baseball games. Hey, if you can't get drunk and fight at a baseball game what kind of country do we live in? Joe Mazzula and Cameron Thoroughman face several charges. Cue the ...
Top Party Schools in Country, Shockingly, Correspond With Top Athletic Programs Except For...Randolph-Macon?
Randolph-Macon College is in Ashland, Virginia. Chances are you've never heard of this school prior to the party school listings. Every other school in the top 20 at least plays D-1 sports. Here's the top 20. Yep, slotted right in there with Texas, Florida State, Ole Miss, Penn State, Georgia and We...
The Beer At Gay Bars Must Be Especially Good
Their school already has the gayest of all mascots — not that there's anything wrong with that — so why shouldn't two University of Virginia football players be arrested for stealing beer from a gay bar? Yep, it happened Saturday. But here's the problem: They tried to run and got caught; and then of...