collegefootball Page 221 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ryan Mallett's Scooter Gives SEC Fans A Head Start On Next Season's Taunts
Arkansas quarterback Ryan Mallett is getting around campus on a special scooter designed to keep his left foot off the ground. (Because a Rascal wasn't dorky enough?) I'm sure it won't come up during road games next fall. [Mr.Sec/Arkansas News]...
Ducks 911 Call: 'M-A-S-O-L-I, Like The Football Player'
The best part about Oregon's Jeremiah Masoli and Garrett Embry pleading guilty to second-degree burglary is that police can officially release the 911 call. Here it is, and it's excellent....
Nerds, Catholics And State Schools Vie For Meaningless Honorific
Here's a pretty fascinating look at which programs can lay claim to being the "winningest" of all time. Rich Rodriguez has a good shot at literally ruining UM's legacy. [Detroit Free Press]...
Florida State Has Asterisks Everywhere
FSU's Sod Cemetery contains grass from the sites of important road wins; some of which, according to the NCAA, are no longer wins. One fan of jurisprudence (and the Gators) took it upon himself to update the headstones. [EDSBS]...
Pistol-Whipping An Assistant Coach Does Not Help Citadel QB's Playing Time
Quarterback Miguel Starks shared time in The Citadel's backfield in 2009, but those struggles are in the past ever since he was arrested for robbing and kidnapping one of the team's assistant coaches. No one is questioning his leadership now!...
Football Team Doesn't Like The News, So They Steal The Newspaper
Bad: Texas A&M-Commerce players busted with drugs. Worse: players take every copy on campus of the school newspaper running the story. Worserer: coach is proud of their "team-building exercise."...
Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch: Antichrist Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow False Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence - quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose - that the Florida quarterback is the Beast....
Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Money Changers Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence - quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose - that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....
Slightly Racist Mascot To Be Replaced With Cult Favorite Squid Monster From Space?
The campaign is underway to name Admiral Ackbar, of "It's a trap!" fame, the new mascot at Ole Miss. Assuming Ole Miss's endowment is enough to cover George Lucas's licensing fees. [AJC]...
Oregon Pretty Much Imploding Before Our Very Eyes (UPDATE)
Oregon football is turning into an outlaw program right in front of us. But one Ducks senior has had just about enough of you people making a big deal of it. You "white people," he means....
Jim Harbaugh Knows What The Kids Like
First of all, I'm shocked to find out that they only split two years ago, instead of ten. Jim, you could probably hire them to cut the grass at Stanford Stadium before they play their set. [Twitter]...
NCAA Waits For Tebow To Leave Before Considering Rule That Would Affect Tebow
They're mulling over a rule that would ban words and designs from eye black. So players will now have to "go away by themself, shut the door behind them, and pray to their Father in private." [AP/Matthew 6:6]...
The NCAA Cracks Down On Concussions, Hurt Feelings
Rules Committee proposal time! The two most pressing issues facing college football are, in no particular order, kids risking their health and livelihoods by playing with concussions, and losing teams feeling sad....
Aggravated Assault? Needs More Cowbell
Mississippi State students can rest easy tonight, because police have finally located the man who brutally beat a fellow student at the Egg Bowl with, yes, a cowbell....
Meanwhile, Florida State Oh So Quietly Vacates A Bunch Of Bobby Bowden's Victories
FSU, in a fit of Super Bowl Sunday housecleaning, throws out 12 football victories, 22 men's basketball victories, a track championship, some old Sam Cassell photos, and a bunch of expired Foot Locker coupons. [Orlando Sentinel, Daily Fix]...
Uproar Over 13-Year-Old Recruit Symbolizes The Grim Specter Of Death
It would be easy to say that the verbal commitment of a 13-year-old crystalizes everything that's wrong with college sports. But the real reason there's been so much handwringing is simple: it makes us realize we're old....
Signing Day Was Best Ever, Says Every Coach Everywhere
Now that the first letters of intent have been signed and sealed, one indisputable fact emerges: every single school had its best recruiting class of all time. Let's look at the not-at-all hyperbolic statements from around the country....
Seantrel Henderson Won Signing Day
It's good to be a five-star recruit. The Minnesota product was flown to New York by the CBS College Sports Network to announce his choice. But that pales in comparison to the treatment his suitors gave him....
Demar Dorsey A Perfect Fit For UM
RichRod yesterday: "There's nobody on this football team that we've signed that has a felony conviction. There's nobody on this football team we signed that has a misdemeanor conviction." Today: Dorsey burglarized two homes in one day in 2007. [Freep]...
Alabama Fax Machine Replaces Memphis Door As Inanimate Symbol Of Existential Dread
On this National Signing Day, Alabama is offering a live video feed of a fax machine. The machine periodically spits out a piece of paper. A name goes up on a board. Nothing to be done. [CBSSports.com, via Bourbon Boys]...