d Page 7289 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Kurt Warner: Buzzsaw Savior
We try not to get into the details of what team in particular we root for around here, but this seems an innocuous enough admission: We love the Arizona Cardinals. This is not some kind of postmodern hip anti-conformist persona; Nobody loves the Arizona Cardinals, so we do! We are serious about th...

Blogdom's Best ...
You Waste Your Time With Us, We Waste Our Time With Them ... It's official: Cubs fans can no longer stomach their team. [Ivy Chat] Cardinals fans all a-twitter with the Yadier Molina fever. [The Birdwatch] Mets are now unwatchable. They almost made it to June! [Amazin' Avenue]...

Breaking News: NHL.com Staffers Still Jerking Off
In their imaginary tournament with imaginary teams coached by their imaginary friends, the fine folks at NHL.com have simulated a HUGE COMEBACK by the 1920's All-Stars over the 1960's All-Stars in the Quest for Canada's Best "tournament." They're gonna have to end this lockout soon, or those guys ...

Laughing At Phil Jackson Is Always Fun
We're not as crazy about Onion-esque sports comedy site SportsPickle.com as others are. It's nothing against them; it's just that The Onion does what it does, and everyone else is just trying too hard. That said, we had to laugh at this story: Phil Jackson Narrows Coaching Choices Down to Heat, Pi...

Derek, Meet Barry. Barry, This Is Derek.
It gets lonely out there in cyberspace — even for megamegamegastars. Barry Bonds pioneered the art of the MLB-hosted huckster Web site with , and that trail was blazed for ... Derek Jeter. MLB.com announced late Wednesday night — gotta hit the news cycle! — that Derek Jeter has launched DerekJeter...

Well, There's No Need To Be <em>Smug</em> About It
Thank You, Kobe! [ThankYouKobe.com]...

Colin Powell Set To Be Marginalized Again
This is what President George Bush did to Colin Powell: He saw that he was an extremely popular public figure; gave him an initial high-ranking, visible position (Secretary of State); did all the real maneuvering behind his back (with Dick Cheney); waited until he needed his public persona the mos...

Yes. He'd Be Just Like Donnie Brasco
"Shaq's interest in police work is very real," says Miami Beach Police Chief Don De Lucca. "I've always said law enforcement is a calling, and I believe Shaquille has been called. He'd be a great undercover guy."...

Tampa Does What It Can To Please Bill Simmons
In a surprise announcement yesterday, the city of Tampa was awarded the Super Bowl in 2009. In a nod to the constant, insufferable bitching by everybody's favorite Interweb columnist, SportsFrog.com points out a key factor in the decision:...

Bonds Finally Pees In The Damn Cup
For all the suspicions and assumptions made over the years, they finally did something to Barry Bonds yesterday they've never done before: They tested him for steroids. ESPN's Bonds Groupie Pedro Gomez — realize that this guy has done nothing but follow Bonds around for months — reports that sever...

About Last Night ...
Things you missed after being cast adrift by the mutineers ... Heat evens series with Pistons 1-all: All you've been able to talk about at work today is Dwayne Wade, which is odd, since you were fired from that job in March. Liverpool wins Euro Club Championship. AC Milan loses when Scott Norwood pe...

The Colin Ferguson Of Soccer
Well, it's not quite as bad as defending yourself for murder — though also not quite as entertaining — but it'll do for now. Soccer "star" El-Hadji Diouf has been taking some real heat for using a public defender to represent him against charges of spitting on an 11-year-old last November. (They c...

To Watch Tonight ...
She left me! How can I go on? How can I ... oh, I remember: TV sports. Game 2: Detroit Pistons at Miami Heat. In the time it takes Shaq to run the length of the court, six million pounds of cocaine have been smuggled into the U.S by boat. Houston Astros at Chicago Cubs. Damn you, Red Sox! We were su...

Leftovers: Oh, Put a Cork in it, Sammy.
Sammy Sosa swings at critics who say he dodged White Sox. Makes case by using frantic hand gestures. [Chicago Sun-Times] Your French Open update: Davenport, Venus survive. Now, take a breath and go on with your day. [Tennis-X.com] Mall magnate vows to keep team in Minnesota after Vikings sale approv...

Hire Stuart Scott!
Your career going nowhere? Relationship on the rocks? Feeling generally unmotivated? We know you're all nodding your heads, morose, defeated. Well, cheer up! Stuart Scott is here to motivate you! According to HireSportsSpeakers.com, you can have Stu come speak for a price that's "over $20,000." (...

Some Helpful Advice For Jerry Rice
The official word is in: Jerry Rice will play for the Denver Broncos next season. To help Jerry get around in his new digs, knowing his past proclivities, we helpfully provide him a sampling of area businesses....

Who Knew Olympians Even Understood Money?
According to the Athens (Ga.) Daily Herald (link via WSJ.com's Daily Fix), Olympian shot putter Adam Nelson is selling himself on eBay. For 6,000 clams — the current price, anyway — you can have your name/business/Web site/plea for love plastered across Nelson's jersey at the upcoming World Track...

Sports Illustrated Keeps Finger On The Web Pulse
Featured Web site in Sports Illustrated's "SI Players" section this week: ManuGinobili.com....

AI Gets Gays All Hot And Bothered
From OutSports.com's Daily Blog today:...

McEwing Still Stalking Wright
One of the more amusing subplots of spring training this year was the strange, moderately disturbing friendship that developed between Mets third baseman David Wright and then-Mets-now-Royals utilityman Joe "Gritty, Gutty, Spunky, Fiesty" McEwing. Wright was reportedly in tears when McEwing, tota...