d Page 7316 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Today In Oddjack
What you're missing over at Oddjack, the site for both the discerning speculator and the degenerate gambler ... • No pressure or anything, but what's your next move, Jerry Rice? (We've got "lion tamer" at 50/1). • NFL betting: Those crazy bastards at Covers have completely lost it this time. • Going...

Advantage: Navratilova
Legitimate belly laughs from our pals at Onion-esque satirical site SportsPickle this morning: Martina Navratilova Toting Around a Battery-Powered Maria Sharapova Bobblehead Doll. Best part:...

The Surprising Sincerity of Stephon Marbury
We feel like you're expecting us to somehow poke fun at Knicks guard Stephon Marbury's emotional breakdown when discussing Hurricane Katrina, but we really can't. The guy was legitimately devastated, and he's also avoiding one of our pet peeves: Attaching charitable donations to some sort of athle...

In Case You Haven't Heard, Bill Simmons Has a Book Coming Out
Well, word is finally out: The Bill Simmons book is public knowledge, now that Our Boy Bill has announced it on his site. (At least Page 2 will let some external links go out.)...

Mike Tyson, Loose In Moscow
Hey, it's a story about Mike Tyson, and he's not beating the crap out of someone or forcing them to do drugs. Though he's in Moscow, so it could just be a matter of time....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. NFL with Chris Mortensen: Our dream is to fight crime as an ESPN Insider. How can we join your elite ranks? • 1 p.m. FB with Mel Kiper: OK, at this point your credibility is so low you may as well work for FEMA. • 4 p.m. U.S. O...

Alberts Crosses Almighty ESPN, Pays Price
Hell hath no fury like a college football analyst scorned, apparently. ESPN college football analyst Trev Alberts was canned yesterday after refusing to come into work on Sunday, which, on Labor Day Weekend, is kind of a key day for college football analysts to work. Apparently Alberts was frustra...

About Last Night ...
Well, once again you've thrown a boot at the TV and pointed the remote at the cat ... • MLB: Pedro, Mets lose again, consider reality series. • MLB: Ortiz, you stud! Red Sox shock Angels. • Talk about steroids, ever take a close look at Kim Clijsters? Er, we mean, Venus ousted in U.S. Open semis....

A Full Report on Marvin Jones' Weekend of Sex
Some pure gold from NFL Wives Club Yahoo Group today: A discussion of former Jets linebacker Marvin Jones, pictured above with his family. Apparently, someone had a weekend fling with the very married Jones and wrote into the group asking for info. The poster "Gata Negro," after reading a bio abou...

Raffy To Apply His Cream Back Home, Alone, Sans Earplugs
He's tried earplugs, he's tried refusing interviews, he's even tried shaving the mustache (OK, wishful thinking there), but since none of that worked, Rafael Palmeiro is taking his burgeoning erection and going home. He's officially "rehabbing his knee," in the same way that Jimmy Hoffa was "garde...

Today In Oddjack
What you're missing over at Oddjack, the site for both the discerning speculator and the degenerate gambler ... • We do believe in Angels, we do, we do, we do! • "I counted on Lee Suggs to have a huge season for my NFL fantasy team, but then he was comically flattened when that grain silo fell on hi...

Ahman Green, Pleader
For anyone who might have forgotten, Packers running back Ahman Green had some trouble with the law early this year; namely, he and his wife had a scuffle that started with a bunch of hollering and ended with some broken plaster and a visit from the 5-0. (Three days after the incident, Green filed...

A Bad Way For Your Party To End
On the list of "Things That Are Not Smart To Do," we'd have to say that "Drunkenly Plowing Into Shaquille O'Neal's Wife" has to be pretty high up there. But that's what happened to some poor soul at the Video Music Awards last week, and, perhaps not surprisingly, the dude ended up on the floor in ...

Today In MLB Blogs
If you've never been there, we can pretty much sum up the bulk of MLB Blogs in three words: Vacuous pap. Hmm — actually, it only took two words....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. Mary Jo Fernandez: Oh, I'm sorry. I wanted to chat with Gigi Fernandez. • 1 p.m. MLB with Rob Neyer: We hardly ever quote Truman Capote, but after reading your book we have to say it: That's not writing, it's typing. • 3 p.m. NEX...

Sayonara, Sammy
It would be safe to say that it has been a difficult year for Orioles outfielder Sammy Sosa. He had that somewhat inexplicable testimony before Congress, where he apparently forgot that he knew how to speak English quite well. The Cubs ran him out of town, and he showed up in Baltimore just in tim...

Suddenly Charitable Bonds Could Return Tonight
We were all set to make fun of Barry Bonds today. ESPN's Pedro Gomez, who has pretty much been sitting outside Bonds' house and sifting through his garbage for months now, finally got the scoop he was waiting for by reporting that Bonds could return from the DL today. We were going to mock Bonds' ...

Jerry Rice Deep-Tissues His Way Into the Sunset
We would like to say "happy trails" to future Hall of Fame receiver Jerry Rice, who retired yesterday after realizing the Broncos actually expected him to run routes, catch passes and occassionally block this season. We salute Rice on his long career, particularly the work he did while hiding in a...

About Last Night ...
• What you missed while shaving profanities onto your dog ... • Florida State beats Miami in football ... wait, that can't be right. • Jerry Rice decides to retire after Broncos clean out his locker, paint over his parking space and refuse to let him back into the building. • White Sox grind Curt Sc...

Week In Deadspin: Anybody Watching Sports This Week?
• Matt Leinart is hitting the books hard this year. • The NFL Network hates stoners, but doesn't mind wife-beaters. • Hey, speaking of wife beaters! • Oliver Stone and Jose Canseco, together at last. • Stat nerds are apparently chopping their penises off. • The trophy wife as cheerleader. • As a pat...