da Page 1196 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Phillies Just Sank Mets' Jengajam
As most of you have already seen, Tom Glavine's outing today didn't last too long — maybe he was double parked? — as the Florida Marlins lit up Mr. 300 with seven runs in the first inning en-route to an 8-1 win. With that, they needed Philadelphia to lose and force a tie. They've been counting on Ph...

But Trent Edwards Holds No Touchdown Records
Bills 17, Jets 14 — The J.P. Losman era in Buffalo might go the way of William Henry Harrison after Trent Edwards' surprising 22-for-28, 234-yard performance. Jets fans are dismayed that their team lost, but encouraged that it was Chad Pennington's fault, since his last-ditch effort at the end the g...

Hoo Boy, Those Ravens Are Not Skilled At Football
Son of a Travis Henry, these Week 4 games are starting off boring. Let's check how each game stood at halftime, because that's how the other weekend guys were doing it, I think:...

You'd Think LeBron Would Be Accustomed To Being Surrounded By Nobodies
Like many of you since 1996, I missed Saturday Night Live last night, hosted by LeBron James, and have only the YouTubery offered up by NBC to go on. In this case, the monologue ("LeBronologue!" Oh, what whimsy!) was my favorite. There was also a High School Musical skit that had so much potential, ...

Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo Oklahoma
ESPN enjoys to alliterate Saturdays with "S" words — which are words that begin with the letter "S" — to glorify the weekend's slate of intense games. Separation Saturday comes foremost to mind. But with all the upsets that occurred in the Top 25, perhaps yesterday should be known as "Suck It" Satur...

If There Is An Allah, He'll Permit A Four-Way Tie
Whenever I see a baseball fight late in the season, I picture Colin Mochrie in front of a green screen trying to figure out what's going on, saying "Well, it all started over a bowl of soup! And now ... look at it!"...

Congratulations, Chicago Prepubescent Bears
What happens when Lou Piniella has nothing else to yell about? Does he grumble that the champagne isn't Korbel? If it is Korbel, does he kvetch that it's not another brand name bubbly? Does he still find some way to throw his hat and choke a child? We may never know the answer, because we're too laz...

OJ's Different, More Philly Lawyer
One of the nice things about these new O.J. Simpson charges, for journalists, is that it's a helluva lot easier to get Simpson's attorneys on the phone than it was 12 years ago. This is no high priced dream team; this is a guy named Yale from South Jersey, and now he's chatting with AJ Daulerio....

Taste The Rockies, Losers! Taste Them!
The Colorado Rockies need a theme song! After beating the Dodgers on Thursday for their 11th straight win — the longest winning streak in the majors this season — they are on the verge of making the playoffs for only the second time in their history. The Rockies are one game out in the wild-card rac...

Drew's Guide To The Proper NFL Viewing Position
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....


Free Hope Solo!
David Hirshey writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer....

Hug It Out, Yankees; You're In The Playoffs
OK, who looked more lifelike: Castro in his latest speech; bin Laden in his last taped address; or George Steinbrenner during Wednesday's Yankees game? They dusted off the long-dead owner, propped him up in a luxury box and had him "watch" New York clinch a playoff berth on Wednesday, the Yankees be...

Our Pick For The Worst Football Coach
We've already made fun of Norv Turned today, but, you know, at least he has shown some aptitude as an offensive coordinator in several different locals. If he weren't coaching the Chargers right now, we might not even be thinking about him — even praising him. But there's no excuse for Dave Wannsted...

You Will Believe A Man Can Fly
We are no experts on the art of the dance, but from most accounts, for a guy with a replaced hip, Mark Cuban did all right on "Dancing With The Stars" last evening. But we have absolutely no idea how he got this high in the air. It kind of freaks us out a little bit; DeSagana Diop is seven feet tal...

Every Day Is Father's Day For Prince Fielder
If neither the awesome might of the robotic 12-person beer bong nor the motivational power of free rectal exams are enough to help the Brewers catch the Cubs in the NL Central, then perhaps Prince Fielder's red-hot animosity toward his father is. Fielder The Younger hit home runs No. 49 and 50 on Tu...

Love (And The NL Wild Card) Is A Battlefield
This photo is from Sunday, but it tells you all you need to know about the Padres right now. Milton Bradley being helped off the field, his season ended due to injury after a run-in with an umpire. San Diego had already lost center fielder Mike Cameron to an injury, meaning that two-thirds of their...

MNF Heads Back To New Orleans
We suspect that tonight's "Monday Night Football" telecast from the Superdome will have the electricity and emotion of last year's MNF game, if just because we don't think Bono's gonna make the trip this year. (However: "Cowboy Mouth" will be in the house!_...