Tell Mike To Dip My TV Listings In Water

It's college basketball and college basketball alone day on TV. So if you can't stand hoops without an intricate bracket in hand, your required retro video game playing for the day is NES's StarTropics. It's not quite Legend of Zelda, but ... well, it's not quite Legend of Zelda.

• Began at noon — College basketball: Syracuse at Villanova. An epic battle to decide 37th place team in the Big East. [ESPN]

• Also began at noon — College basketball: Maryland at Georgia Tech. I feel like slamming Greivis Vasquez for turning the ball over too much, if only to see what Scott Van Pelt's reaction is. [ESPN2]

• 1 p.m. — College basketball: Kentucky at Georgia. Uga will appear at the game by proxy. The real one has to be at a ribbon-cutting for a new Krystal. [CBS]

• 1 p.m. — Documentary: Third And A Mile: The History Of The Black Quarterback. Adapted from a book by New York Times writer William C. Rhoden, nowhere does it mention Jarious Jackson, Quincy Carter, or Akili Smith. [ESPN Classic]

• 2 p.m. — College basketball: Oklahoma State at Texas Tech. Bring your game faces, OSU. [ESPN]

• 2 p.m. — College basketball: Rider at Siena. Aanother claassic MAAC gaame. [ESPN2]

• 3 p.m. — Track and Field: Millrose Games. I predict gold medals out of Thomas Calabro and Courtney Thorne-Smith. [NBC]

• 3 p.m. — Golf: FBR Open, Scottsdale, Arizona. "Wow, a lot of sportswriters came out to watch us play." [CBS]

• 3:30 p.m. — College Basketball: Teams TBA. When asked about who the teams were, network spokesman Moblin replied, "It's a secret to everyone." [ABC]

• 4 p.m. — College basketball: South Alabama at Louisiana-Monroe. Really, you want ULM to win? Does that mean you hate USA? [ESPN2]

• 4 p.m. — College Football All-Star Challenge. Today's hottest NCAA stars try to run an obstacle course while dodging Yahoo! Sports investigative writers. [ESPN]