da Page 1224 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Closer: Exploring The Melky Way
Notes from a day in baseball ......
Only A Matter Of Time Before This Becomes An Olympic Sport, You Know
It is at once Carl Monday's worst nightmare, and everyone else's dream come true. On August 5, hundreds of people will gather in a hall in central London to, um, pleasure themselves for charity. We only wish we were kidding about the UK's first "masturbate-a-thon," in which contestants — both men ...
The Closer: It Hasn't Been A Barry Good Year
Notes from a day in baseball:...
The Headbutt That Will Not Die
If you're tired of hearing about the Zidane World Cup headbutt (or, the "Glasgow Handshake," as such a move is more commonly called), well, sorry. Even as you read this, an army of computer nerds are producing animated gifs of the incident at alarming rates. The French have their version of the co...
One Final Monday-Cooper Explosion ... Be Ready
So if you're like us and you spend your weekends doing everything you can to avoid the computer, you might not know about this yet. So we feel like maybe you should sit down. Take a deep breath. You might not be ready....
Dan Marino May Look Much Different Next Year On CBS
If you're not familiar with PostSecret.com, it's a website that invites the general public to send in their deepest, darkest secrets on a postcard, and then they publish them on their website. It's a popular website. There's a book in publication, and a lot of people, I suppose, find it therapeuatic...
Cowboys Safety Keith Davis Shot
Dallas Cowboys safety Keith Davis is recovering from two gunshot wounds sustained last night during a drive-by shooting on a Dallas highway. His condition is listed as stable, and despite being shot in the head and in the thigh, his injuries aren't considering life-threatening....
It Just Keeps Giving
I'm afraid I gave you only part of the story with the earlier Mike Cooper post. Carl Monday has gotten himself involved again, and where there's Carl Monday, there's more story....
Mike Cooper Avoids Jail Time; Prison Showers
The sentence has come down, once again, courtesy of our man Jimbo. Mike Cooper, he of library-masturbating fame, was found guilty, and was fined $150 plus court costs. That's it. Bail was $500,000, and the fine is $150. All is well that ends well, I suppose. Who among us hasn't paid $150 for an or...
The Mike Cooper Sentencing ... You Are There!
Well, the Mike Cooper sentencing is over, and our man Jimbo was, indeed, there. We're still not sure precisely what Cooper's sentence was — Jimbo didn't make it that far into the proceedings — but he was there, and he even captured Cooper and his parents on his camera phone ... kind of....
Cultural Oddsmaker: Death Becomes Them
A.J. Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Send him all kinds of fan mail....
Do Not Date Flozell Adams, Girls
A Web site we hadn't heard of before called Don't Date Him, Girl purports to list the names and descriptions of guys that girls should, you know, not date, girl. Web sites like this make us nervous, so after we searched for our own name and the names of almost all our friends, we were pointed to t...
It's Judgment Day For Mike Cooper
Today, friends, could be the final chapter in The Most Amazing Story Of Our Time: Mike Cooper himself is due to be sentenced today, at 1:30 p.m. ET, in Berea Municipal Court....
The Closer: Oh, How We've Missed It All!
Notes from a day in baseball:...
You Know, We Hear The Smell Attracts Bears
You know, there are times when it's obvious that we're not covering enough auto racing around these parts....
No Idea Where Zidane Might Have Gotten His Temper From
In a time of heated rhetoric, political grandstanding and continued confusion on the facts, we looked forward to an interview with Zinedine Zidane's ailing mother. Perhaps the woman would provide us with some much-need perspective, give everyone a chance to just cool down and realize that it's jus...
Marco Materazzi Is Apparently A Total Moron
As far as defenses against accusations of making racist remarks go, we have to say, Italian player Marco Materazzi has a particularly good one after being notoriously head-butted by Zinedine Zidane....
Deadspin Field Trip: Tahoe Celebrity Golf Tournament
Ever wonder what goes on behind the scenes at a real celebrity golf tournament? Yeah, neither have we. But because it's right next door to two major casinos, we are proud to report that Deadspin associate editor Rick Chandler, who does more work around here than people realize, is going to attend ...
Dr. Z Is Mad As Hell (Again)
We'll get into an update of all the fun Zinedine Zidane theories a little later today, but we wanted to pause to take a look at Paul Zimmerman's column for SI.com yesterday. We have no shame about this: We love Paul Zimmerman. We know he's old, we know he's cranky, we know he probably spends most ...