dad Page 29 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Point Afters Only Belong In Back Issues Of SI
Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo previews the upcoming weekend of the NFL every, well, every Thursday afternoon....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you try and watch "Honk If You're Horny" in peace:...

NFL Pants Party: Super Bowl XLII
We're five long months away from the Super Bowl, and a lot can happen each week to change the complexion of the league. Still, it's worth trying to pick your Super Bowl teams now, because if your picks do turn out to be correct, you can be that one fuckface that runs around bragging about how you pr...

College GameDay: An Appreciation
Drew wrote a thoughtful piece about ESPN's traveling band of college football analysts that we probably should have run yesterday. I still think it's semi-pertinent since these guys are the exact opposite of the professional counterparts that we'll be tolerating today, who seem to excel at nothing e...

For Your Sunday Afternoon Viewing Pleasure
Last year, MJD provided you with regional coverage maps for the NFL, and we're happy to have located them once again. Click on the links to find the game in your area, plus the assigned announcing team:...

May Pete Rose Live Long And Die Out
Perhaps you've heard of the new book The World Without Us, Alan Weisman's blow-by-blow account of what would happen on Earth if all human beings suddenly disappeared. But if you think this book is just some environmentalist's wet dream, you're wrong. Dead wrong. People, I give you The Voluntary Huma...

College Games You'd Wade Through A Pile Of $#!+ To See
Only two games this weekend feature ranked opponents going head-to-head. But there are still plenty of intriguing non-conference matchups on the schedule. And you never know when a highly ranked team will shit the bed against an unworthy foe. Could Florida lose to Troy? Anything's possible now....

Introducing Big Daddy Drew's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo
We are extremely excited to introduce Kissing Suzy Kolber's Big Daddy Drew's brand new column, which will run every Thursday during the NFL season. It'll preview the weekend's action, occasionally digress and mostly revel in the joy and anticipation we all feel at the end of every week, knowing th...

More Proof That You Should Ride Your Kids HARD
You might remember old Southern California quarterback Todd Marinovich as the guy who was absolutely ruined by his hard-driving father. Once considered the "robo QB," Marinovich's dad famously didn't allow his son fast food and claimed he wanted to produce the "perfect" quarterback. As kids tend to ...

Tom Brady has eight more bastard children to go if he wants to catch up to Travis Henry. The Denver Broncos running back "fathered" nine children scattered about the southern United States, using nine different mommies. Somehow that $25 million contract wasn't enough to write off his unpaid child su...

Back When The Fielders Got Along
This might have something to do with it:...

You Are Up For Adoption
As Will told you yesterday, Weekend Daddy no longer wants custody of you. I've got this weekend, and one more. I had planned to just surprise everyone with my last post, and throw up a full-frontal picture of Jeff Reed's genitalia, but I guess that's not necessary now. Of course, it seems like it's ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wishing a happy birthday to the legend that is unsilent majority ... • MLB: Cleveland at Boston [ESPN2]; Florida at Chicago Cubs. Red Sox's magic number is 90. [WGN] • NBA: Western Conference finals, Utah at San Antonio, Game 5. Let's point the t-shirt cannon toward the court thi...

Nothing Better Than A Sports Dad
Sports dads creep us out, generally speaking, and yeah: Dads of world-class female athletes actually do creep us out more, whether that's fair or not. We have no children, but if we did, we think we would discourage them to play sports, or at least discouraging them to do so around us. We think, lik...

Super Bowl XLI, The Loo, And You
Thinking of using the bathroom during Super Bowl halftime? Well, OK ... if you must. But please heed these important guidelines as laid down by the Miami-Dade Sewer Department....

Who's The Mysterious Extorted St. Louis Athlete?
The Smoking Gun just posted an amusing report about a St. Louis athlete being extorted for supposedly impregnating some guy's daughter. (Those are usually who are impregnated.) The code name for the player is "P.A."...

Son, This In No Way Reflects On My Own Past Athletic Frustrations
In the grand tradition of the egg fertilizers of Mary Pierce and Todd Marinovich, we present Frank Colavecchia, the father of Rocco Colavecchia, a quarterback for Shenango High School in New Castle, Penn. Last week, Frank posed as a scout from Ohio University — to get into character, we suspect he...

Drew Henson, Man Of Many Ugly Hats
Has there ever been an athlete more consistently overconsidered, for such an extended period of time, as Drew Henson? The guy has been all potential, zero performance; he's Ryan Leaf, except he did it in two sports ... and he wasn't very good in college either....

Live Blog: Paraguay Vs. Trinidad & Tobago
Paraguay has been a big disappointment, losing two games 1-0 and already having been eliminated. Meanwhile, the plucky Trinidadians — Toboggans? — look unlikely to make the next round; they need a convincing victory and a blowout loss by Sweden against England. But that's more than perhaps they ex...

Live Blog: England Vs. Trinidad & Tobago
Hey, everybody, it's England! America, Sr.! This is the first weekday game for the Brits, but despite an opening victory over Paraguay that was much-maligned, a win here sends them into the Round of 16. Will we see that Rooney fellow? Will Crouch do the robot? Is Beckham wearing a sarong? All kinds ...