dc Page 323 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. MLB Inside Rob Neyer: Is calculating OBP more fun after 2 a.m.? • 2 p.m. NASCAR with Terry Blount: In retrospect, should a pit crew even bother with the rear-window de-fogger? • 4 p.m. NFL with Pro Football Weekly: Is it so wrong...

Vince Carter Reveals Himself Again
Legitimate question: Why would anyone with any sort of hopes for someday winning an NBA championship spring for Vince Carter this offseason? In the most important game of the year for his Nets, Carter dribbled the ball of his foot during the final possession, ultimately shooting 6-for-23 as the Nets...

Last Call To Keep Any Of These Close
The general consensus, to this point, is that the Jazz-Warriors and Pistons-Bulls series are pretty much over: The favorites up 3-1 with two home games to close it out. Well, if the Nets and Suns can't hold serve tonight, they might be well be in the same position....

We Have To Ask
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 10 a.m. Monday's Morning Buzz: Tank Johnson is in a tree in my front yard. Can the Humane Society shoot him with a tranquilizer gun and relocate him further back into the woods? • 1 p.m. AFL w/Rush DB Jeremy Unerti: Is there a more fut...

When They Think About You ...
Last year, MJD told you about the special World Cup vibrators named after German "stars" Michael Ballack and Oliver Kahn, which promised to make women feel "'like you've won the world cup of sex," which hopefully doesn't involve a head butt....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Fantasy league injuries. Ow, my diverticulitis! • 1 p.m. Page 2's D.J. Gallo: Don't you wish that someone would occasionally order you to pick the Pirates? • 2 p.m. NASCAR with David Newton: Didn't I just see Dale Earnhardt Jr....

Please Keep Six Feet Between You And The Cavs Dancers
Currently, in the Ohio (of course) legislature, there's a bill attempting to define what constitutes a strip club and how they should be governed (for example, they're considering not allowing dancers to perform after midnight and instituting a six-foot buffer between dancer and patron). But yesterd...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m. MLB Insider Keith Law: How come no firestorm when David Wells opens his big yap? • 2 p.m. MLS w/Salt Lake's Chris Klein: DeSmet Jesuit High School in St. Louis, Mo.? I loaned you five bucks at the food machines? Pay up, Klein! •...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m. Boxing historian Bert Sugar: Is there anyone on earth older than you? • 3 p.m. College FB with Beano Cook: Oh, never mind. We withdraw the question. • 4 p.m. Golf with Jason Sobel: You're a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wan...

Easy Pickings In The Eastern Conference
We mean no offense to a fan base that has to be ecstatic, but has an NBA team ever won its first six playoff games in less impressive fashion than the Cleveland Cavaliers? The Arenas-less Wizards folded fast, and, last night, the Nets looked like they really weren't up for much more basketball, than...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11:15 a.m. Baseball with Joe Morgan: I'm having trouble sleeping; could you explain the strike zone one more time? • 2 p.m. NASCAR with Terry Blount: What would Jesus endorse? • 4 p.m. Pro Football Weekly: Warren Sapp's fat ... where d...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m. AFL with Rush's Bobby Sippio: Wait; Arena League players have web sites now? • 3 p.m. Fantasy Baseball Focus: No, don't waste a pick on Clemens, you said. Probably won't play this year, you said. Why do I listen to you? • 4 p.m....

Free Darko Playoff Pants Party: Cavaliers Vs. Nets
The second round continues with two more matchups today. We've already previewed Suns-Spurs tonight....

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • Noon. Baseball with Jerry Crasnick: Slip 'n Slide between first and second base ... good idea? Discuss. • 1 p.m. Pro boxer Bernard Hopkins: Looking for a nickname? I have several for sale on eBay. • 2 p.m. Saints' new running back Anto...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m. NCAA Lax w/Quint Kessenich: Do you get extra points for catching butterflies? • 1:30 p.m. NASCAR driver Kurt Busch: Why are the only questions coming from Jimmy Spencer? • 2 p.m. MLS w/Rev's Steve Ralston: Will Randy Moss be req...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 1 p.m. Football draft expert Mel Kiper: As if the anal retentive coverage of the draft itself wasn't enough, now we need further examination of Michael Okwo's Superprep rating? • 2 p.m. Pro boxer Oscar De La Hoya: May 5 is not your nig...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for tonight's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. NBA senior writer Marc Stein: Is that a thunderstick in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me? • 11:15 a.m. Baseball with Joe Morgan: WTF are you talking about? • 4 p.m. Boxer Floyd Mayweather Jr.: Because we haven't s...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. NBA Insider John Hollinger: So is Mark Cuban shitting actual bricks right now, and if so, will they be on eBay? • 2 p.m. Boxer Wladimir Kitschko: How many times have you seen Red Heat? • 3 p.m. Fantasy Injury Focus: Is Griffey's anus o...

The Best Possible Reason To Buy An MLS Jersey
I don't know if I can take another second of NFL Draft coverage. No matter what I look at now, a tree, a drunken hobo, a bag of cocaine, I see a scrolling "team needs" bar underneath it, and I hear Mel Kiper telling me about its ability to explode. So we leave you today with something, hopefully, ki...

We Have To Ask ...
Suggested questions for today's ESPN SportsNation chatters ... • 11 a.m. Fantasy league injuries: Do Griffey's recent problems count? Ow, my anus! • 11 a.m. Olympian J. Joyner-Kersee: Which make better weapons while riding the St. Louis Metrolink; gold or silver medals? • 2 p.m. NASCAR with David Ne...