dea Page 487 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Listen Only To Those With Expertise
• Woo-hoo, another ESPN Memo! • Stephen A. Smith is so much more qualified than your stupid bloggers. • John Maine wore a dress, and then made it clear that he didn't. • "You Dead, Dawg," Deadwood-style. • The Football Guys. • Illinois in the Rose Bowl. Yipes. • Denny Green, copyrightin'! • Ashley Y...

Which Sports-Related Person Would Engage In A 2Girls1Cup-Type Video?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday ... well, that next five Fridays, anyway. Yes, after more than a year of goodness, Mr. Daulerio is retiring the Cultural Oddsmaker column at the beginning of 2008. There are now FIVE left. Email him to let him know how much you'll miss him....

Don't Feed Them After Midnight
Give him to us. We'll take him to the kennel, they'll put him to sleep. It will be quick and painless compared to what we would do to him. We'll catch the beast ourselves. He'll get what he deserves, a slow painful death. Maybe we'll put him in our spin-drier on high heat....

Uncovering The 19th Century Version Of 'You Dead, Dawg'
Well, this just makes me miss Deadwood all the more: It seems that raunchy language was such a problem in professional baseball in the late 1800s, that the league actually handed out a document telling players to knock it off. It lists several examples of banned expressions, which are absolutely fil...

Fun With Knicks' Math
• R.I.P., Sean Taylor. • Enough, Eli, enough. • We miss Saturday NFL too. • Pau Gasol poops. • The Daily Illini rules. • The Patriots could possibly lose. Possibly. • The Bob Knight Gun Show • God, we love Canada. • Bill Conlin would like you to get off his lawn. • Covering the Knicks is miserable. ...

Where'd You Hide The Alcohol, Danny Ocean?
It's like a three thing... it's, like, ball, dick, ball. It's like a division sign... we just wish you would take those off....

Workin' On Thanksgiving
• Nick Saban is a student of history. • It's funny when sideline reporters are dropped on their head. • The Celtics aren't going undefeated. • Zoooooook. • Isiah somehow survived the week. • Thanksgiving is not that important to Ron Mexico. • We will miss Kaz Tadano. • Frank TV is here! (Briefly.) •...

We'll Be Listening To You
We know that you know, Mr. Caul. For your own sake, don't get involved any further....

Al Davis Is Not At All Insane
We thought you should know that Al Davis stated recently that he will not retire until the Oakland Raiders win two more Super Bowls. We're not saying that it may take a few years, but we did immediately think of this photo. "Al, if you want a two tight end set, beep twice. For a running play, beep o...

If It's November, It Must Be SHOTY Time
• Welcome, 2007 SHOTY! • See Digger Phelps act. • A fun week for Aubrey Huff. • Look, the book has a cover! • Stephon Marbury fever. Catch it. • The Lambeau ... ow! • I - L - L! • Welcome "back," A-Rod. • Marching bands are cool. Really. • Down goes Oregon. • Barry. Barry. Barry....

Mom And Me Versus You And Dad
She's a very risky writer, Lili. Very racy. Exhibiting her c—t in that fashion is very racy. We mean, Lili has her influences in post modern literature, it's a bit derivative of Kafka, but for a student, very racy. Did you get that it was her c—t?...

The Buckeyes And Wolverines Are Still Playing This Weekend
This year's Ohio State-Michigan game, thanks to Illinois' win last week (woo!) and the lack of a legendary coach dying right beforehand, doesn't quite have the inherent drama of last year's. But it's still freaking Ohio State-Michigan....

Tennessee Football Players Have It All
• Josh McNeil is living the American Dream. • Sox tickets are more expensive than they used to be. • Yum yum. • Maverick! • Unsilent did some good work on our day off. • How we missed Chris Henry. • We will never think of Rivers the same way again. • Choo-Choo. • Email aside, be careful of buying th...

All In All, Not A Bad Guy, If Looks, Brains And Personality Don't Count
Nah, it stayed a hat and no, we didn't chase it. Nothing more foolish than a man chasin' his hat....

Peterson Breaks Rushing Record, Transubstantiates
Forget about rookie records, Adrian Peterson is going after bigger game. It's taken Minnesota's first-year wunderkind a mere eight attempts to break the NFL's record for rushing in a game. The 296 yard eruption led the Vikings to a 35-17 flattening of the San Diego Chargers and put Peterson over the...

Your Next Book Club Selection
Yesterday, we introduced the Deadspin Book Club, but it's clear we should have planned better for it, since essentially we were asking you to read a discussion of a book you had not read. We're going to try to improve on that....

Introducing The Deadspin Book Club
We love books. Books are fun. They're so full of booky goodness. And because we don't have time to read and write about every sports book, we've corralled three regular Deadspinners to inaugurate the Deadspin Book Club, discussions of current sports books. Your panelists are Unsilent Majority, Signa...

Boston Now Controls Everything. Beware.
• The Red Sox went to the World Series and then started kicking some ass. • One happy Kentucky fan. • We'll call this an agent screwup. • Heath Shuler, still awesome. • Ack! Jason Taylor robot! • Here comes Dennis Miller. • Larry King explodes. • Channing Crowder is smart. • Sorry: Still not worth i...

Attica! Attica!
We couldn't explain why we did the things we did. So we went to this psychiatrist who explained to us that we were a woman in a man's body. So Sonny right away wanted to get us money for a sex change operation: but where was he to get that? 2500 dollars! God, he's in hock up to his ears already....

Memorial Stadium, Under The Lights
• Wait. You do it with Derek Jeter and some other lady, and you expect free parking too? Sheesh. • This is not the best way to intimidate Josh Beckett. • The Rockies are in the World Series. • See ya, Torre. • Mr. Lloyd, Mr. Aikman is on line two. • Bill Simmons, mo-capped. • Those diligent beat rep...