detroit-lions Page 19 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Shittiest Seven Minutes Of The NFL Season, Condensed To One Shitty Minute
This is the Bears' second drive of the game, reduced to just the play stoppages. The drive lasted seven minutes and featured seven penalty calls in all and ended with Matt Forte getting stuffed on a fourth-and-1 at Detroit's 26. It was horrible. Relive it here....

Semi-Sentient Mammals Of The NFC North: Your <i>Monday Night Football</i> Open Thread
Cutler! Stafford! Suh! Urlacher! And a cast of 102 other players, many of them memorable in their own right. It's Bears/Lions on ESPN, with Detroit trying to keep pace with Green Bay, and Chicago merely trying to stay above water....

Big Lions Fan: Today's Victory Over The "Pathetic, Subpar" Cowboys Wasn't An Upset
From the looks of things, this fella here is so confident in his Detroit Lions's championship destiny that he's worked up a "Lions To The Super Bowl" report video intro heavy on Creedence....

Watch Calvin Johnson Make An Incredible Catch During The Lions Comeback Win Over Dallas
Detroit Lions QB Matthew Stafford didn't have any open receivers. That doesn't matter when you can throw an alley-oop in triple-covered Calvin Johnson's direction....

"We Were Packed In Like Sardines": Two Former Customers Review Detroit's Booty Bus
Soon after we learned about the Booty Lounge, the mobile strip club that's been idling near Detroit's Ford Field during every Lions tailgate for the past decade or so, we heard from a few former patrons. And after finding the priceless Yelp review from a former scorned freelancer for the club that y...

Detroit Police Will Investigate The Ford Field "Booty Bus" That Its Officers Have Informally Investigated For A Year
Detroit police are attending and also investigating the Booty Lounge, a mobile strip club that occupies a spot in a parking lot near Ford Field during Lions home games. The venue is a school bus that has been painted over in black and red paint, with the words "BOOTY LOUNGE" in silver letters on its...

The One Where We're Offered A Tape Of Two NFL Players Humping A Teenage Puerto Rican Prostitute (AUDIO VERSION)
Welcome back to Deleted Scenes. This space is now reserved for those scuzz-money entrepreneurs who've unsuccessfully tried to sell us prurient information. This is also where we'll run notable emails we've received from some of our readers. All emails are [sic]'d. Enjoy....

Feed Me To The Detroit Lions!
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

I Hope Andy Dalton's Head Was Worth $20K To Ndamukong Suh
Ndamukong Suh burst into the NFL by trying to wrench Jake Delhomme's skull from his torso, perhaps to keep on his mantel. Suh seems to be making a habit of thinning the mediocre QB herd in preseason, with this weekend's takedown of Cincinnati's Andy Dalton....

Some Rockets Are Just More Impressive Than Others
Your morning roundup for Aug. 9, the day we decided not to bid on the Marilyn Monroe sex tape. H/T to Gordon for the photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Video Game Addict Quinn Pitcock Attempts Another NFL Comeback
In 2007, the Indianapolis Colts drafted All-American defensive tackle Quinn Pitcock in the third round. But Pitcock retired after just one season in the NFL. His early exit had nothing to do with injury or drugs or guns. Well, actually it did have to do with guns. Pitcock, you see, was addicted to v...

Joey Harrington Hit While On A Bicycle In Portland
Former Lions and Dolphins quarterback Joey Harrington has now reached the nadir of his Portland days. He was hit from behind while biking....

Nobody Wants To Be The Next Rex Ryan
HBO's trying to pick a team to follow for this year's edition of "Hard Knocks," but between the uncertainty of the lockout and the sometimes unwanted publicity generated by recent shows, they can't find their franchise. The Broncos have made clear that they're not interested, and last week the Bucca...

The Detroit Lions Went Ahead And Emailed Their Pre-Draft Player-Visit Plans To Every Team In The League
If Commissioner Roger Goodell takes the stage and says, "With the 13th pick in the draft, the Detroit Lions select...," but nobody is watching, is it still totally embarrassing that everybody in the league already knows how that sentence is about to end? Tough to say. Lions fans are used to being s...

Remember, NFL Players: You're Subject To A Fine If You Tell A Fan To Suck Your Dick
Lions Center Dominic Raiola has a great rapport with Dolphins fans. [PFT]...

The Dougie Is Dead, And Drew Stanton Killed It
After a long illness, The Dougie passed away at 1:40 yesterday afternoon. Drew Stanton was by its side. In lieu of flowers, please send ideas for a new novelty dance....

Surprisingly Congruous When You Think About It Mixtape Theater: Barry Sanders
Welcome to Surprisingly Congruous When You Think About It Mixtape Theater. Today's entry: Lions great Barry Sanders set to Clint Mansell & The Kronos Quartet's overture from the Requiem For A Dream soundtrack....

Depressed Pilgrims Encapsulate The Lions Thanksgiving Tradition
That's seven straight losses for Detroit on Turkey Day, and don't expect them to lose the Thursday slot any time soon. At the very least, maybe the league could schedule them for a high school homecoming game. [Where's Weems]...

Your Annual "I'm Watching This Because I Have Calvin Johnson On My Fantasy Team" Open Thread
This could be one of those 50-10 Thanksgiving blowouts the Lions have semi-traditionally served-up for turkey-banging America, but in this kooky NFL season, Shaun Hill could have the game of his life. Yell about all the pre-feast drama, right here....

One "Worst Player In NFL History" Is Volcanically Pissed About Being A "Worst Player In NFL History"
Jeff Pearlman's massive list of football putridity has provoked an emotional reaction from Detroit Lions' safety, C.C. Brown, who was selected as the 90th worst player. He was not pleased with his ranking. In fact, he went completely berserk. ....